Dating for 3 months. Met on the app. We have not had penetrative sex (been open that I'm waiting for marriage/ exclusivity) but have done other things and he says that he is "pleased" in that department.
Signs it's casual
- No labels/ discussion of exclusivity
- He used to text A LOT more frequently; he will still text daily but response time varies between 3 - 24 hours
- He's still active on the apps
Signs he's interested
- Introduced me to his family (parents and brothers) at 2 months
- Consistently hanging out once per week on weekends
- He's referred to it as a relationship, uses "we", made references to plans months from now (concerts etc.)
- Seems to get upset if other men show me attention
- Has never flaked on plans or been late. Very affectionate. Plans are mixed of dinners, lunches, activities (aka not just at his place or my place). He pays for pretty much everything.
Obviously, he is keeping his options open. The massive spaces in between texting really bother me; I don't know if I am demanding too much, to expect exclusivity now or at least more frequent hangouts and texting.
I really like him, and want a committed relationship with him. Should I give a little more time to feel things out? Should I also take hours to respond, or would that become a tit-for-tat? Really unsure what to do, please help :(
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
1Opinion
After 3 months it’s a long time. Ask him what you guys are
Any advice for how to bring this up without scaring him off?
You can ask him when you guys are laying next to each other or sitting next to each other. Grab his hand and ask something like “so what are we” or “are we exclude”
Exclusive *
He’s not going to commit to anyone that wants to “hold out” until marriage. Find a Mormon.
What is it you wish he would do differently?
Define the relationship (i. e. exclusivity, or if he DOESN'T see this working) and/or text back in a more reasonable time frame. He will double-text if he notices me pulling away, and he gets upset if other men flirt with me, so why is it okay for him to still be on the apps?
I feel like I am getting mixed signals and I'm not sure what to do
That's fair. Is he still actively using the app or has he just not removed it?
He is actively using the app
Ah. Yah prob a goof idea to ditch him then. Still worth asking him about it though