So I went back to the guy who took my vCard. It’s only been a month and it’s been terrible. I hate him all over again. I tried to tell him I needed boundaries because we were not friends with benefits but he never listens. He never cares. He literally said the most disrespectful thing to me after I cried my eyes out over text. I was hoping he would respond in a healthy way. He tells me hours later after my vent session that he didn’t read, he didn’t want to respond or answer anything. And then proceeds to ask me to come to him for sex. In his words “come s*** me” I was devastated. Cried until my eyes were swollen. He never engaged with it. So I left a very strong message to knock him down a peg. I made him think that sex with him was soo amazing that I had no sense so I told him he wasn’t that great. Of all the things that’s what made him unadd me. I felt sad because I still wanted us to get over it eventually be friends maybe but I don’t think he’ll ever talk to me again. Should I try and make amends? Is it too soon? I just want him in my life but I know having sex with him is no good for me. Should I ask if we can be friends? Should I just let things play out let it go? I don't know I need some advice?
2 mo
Should I still try to be his friends?
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
2Opinion
Oh girl, I'm so sorry you had to go through all that with him again. You did NOT deserve the way he treated you, especially after opening up about feeling hurt. Huge red flag that he only seems interested when sex is involved, and completely disregards your feelings.
Honestly, I don't think trying to be friends would be healthy for you right now. You said it yourself - sleeping with him isn't good for you. And someone who respects you as a person would never talk to you the way he did, or make you cry like that.
I think you need to take some space from him to heal your heart. Reach out to your real friends who build you up instead of tear you down. Work on loving yourself without needing validation from dudebros.
In time, once the hurt isn't so fresh, maybe you could be casual acquaintances if paths cross. But for now, I say let it be - don't message him trying to "make amends." You did nothing wrong girl! Prioritize your wellbeing and happiness without him. Okay? *hugs* You deserve so much more sis!
Why do u feel the need to be friends with him?
I’m not sure. I think that being friends with him would make things easier for me in a way. I know anything more can’t work but I do care about him and the not knowing what’s happening in his life even if it’s not mutual
Yet u don't actually like the person he is because he is a asshole he is not the person u imagine him to be in your mind u need 2 move on as even the reason u give won't help u when he gets into a relationship u will be happy?
I know you’re right I just wanted to feel like I still had access I think. It’s just hard to accept that he was really that shitty of a person when I cared soo much I don't know
U do know u are trying to live a dream and not reality move on you pick a shit first love he ain't the man in your head he is some loser that just wants sex
not worth it