To get a pretty girl. Because of social media.
Girls now no longer have realistic expectations. They expect men that are too good for her, the most handsome, the tallest, the most status and most money.
All that comes before being a good person.
The number 1️⃣ thing is being really handsome, because then the girls fight for you, all the other things are bonuses.
Men are becoming increasingly invisible to women.
dating is the same, you just see your pov and not woman's. If you are a pretty guy you can expect a pretty girl, but if you are not than its shooting above your weight. Of course all the things you mentioned are desirable in anyone. And men as well want a model but look like trolls or have nothing really to offer. There are pretty girls that care about money, there are pretty girls that care about looks so everyone just gotta find their match.
Women swipe less right cause they actually take it more seriously than men. Men just swipe on any girl that is ok looking in hope of a match. Women dont care about matches, we care about picking the right person, so your pics, your profile needs to say about you. Yes we get matches and most of those men only want sex or are not mature and dont take dating seriously. Those bad experiences make us even less likely to swipe and rather search for someone who seems to ft criteria that we won't get ghosted or hurt again. Men think zero about that, they usually think she is hot and only about woman liking them on app, what comes next most dont think about one bit so often they get owerwhelmed and ghost.
If you are frustrated cause you have no luck in love and dating, well join the club. Im a 34 year old female, I am good looking, have master's degree, I'm financially and career sucessful, was never married, have no kids... and am incredibly unlucky about love. Yes, I may be considered picky, but I dont ask for anything I dont offer myself. Men have texted me, liked me, added me but they also really for no reason on my part ghosted me and been rude and very unpleasant to me. Online or in RL. So dating is hard, for everyone, unless you are less emotional and more lucky.
I would also like to add that unlike your average woman, I have actually liked, added, texted, approached men first in order to go on a date with them, be it online or in RL. This has also been unsuccessful to me, be it I rejecte them at some point or they rejected me. I had to add this so you dont wine you men need to do everything. Approaching/liking is not dping everything, actually consistanly trying and trying is what matters and maintain a relationship and putting an effort in the long run. Approaching isn't easy but it's not everything, it's just one thing that needs to be done in order to find love, among million others that women do as well.
Here’s the thing, most women that I know only want and accept men who treat them how they feel they deserve to be treated. They couldn’t give a damn and a half what that guy looks like so long as he treats them well and makes them laugh. Now of course I realize that’s not all women, but it’s the majority of the women I know. I also realize that the expectations of men and how they treat women has risen, but it hasn’t risen by much.
Most women I know only expect guys to be gentlemanly, kind and respectful to the people around them (including the woman they’re with), self-sufficient (meaning they don’t have to act like the guy’s mother), and to make them laugh. I believe more and more women are starting to expect no less then that. Now of course, this is just from my perspective.
Sex is a naturally competitive process. You're competing for the survival of your genes. I completely understand and agree with you about women having superficial and unrealistic expectations these days, but I would say that really simplifies dating as long as you approach dating with a positive attitude and don't think with your dick.
First off, lots of men are becoming discouraged by the modern dating scene and dropping out entirely - so that's less competition there. Second, thanks to social media and feminism women are very open about being the miserable superficial whores that they are so it's easy to eliminate them from your consideration. Obviously both these things are not good at all from a societal standpoint and hint at increasingly bad times on the horizon, but at least dating has now drastically simplified.
So if you approach things with the right attitude like I've outlined, dating is extremely easy for men. Cast as large a net as you possibly can with dating apps, cold approaching, and meeting through friends or social groups - and then weed out all the bad women. They'll make it easy for you to identify them as well because there are zero social repercussions at all for women acting slutty/bitchy etc. Most will be proud of their poor behavior and flaunt it. Eliminate them and pursue the women who have a moral compass.
I wouldn't call that to competitive, dating has always been competitive although at a lower scale. But you are absolutely right on the unrealistic expectations part because very high quality men are willing to fuck a 6 when they just want to get laid that night and are nearby. So women can have sex way out of their league and will get guys way out of their league to chase them on apps. That inflates confidence by a lot, to where if a guy who is actually a great match for her approaches she thinks she's above him.
Obviously its not all girls (Haven't been on dating apps yet so I don't know the percentage, I just heard this from people who do use those apps and it makes total sense), and luckily for the men at their level there will always be girls smart and self-aware enough to know he is a great match for her instead of pursuing someone who is obviously going to cheat or dump her at some point.
I think it would be the same for men if the situation was reverse and we offered relationships while they offer sex in abundance. If you could sleep with models on a reasonably regular basis would you settle for a 6 looking girlfriend even if in reality you are a 6?
Opinion
28Opinion
It is…
As soon as I got on my feet, already a lot of guys asking me out.
They asked me out even when I had a broken leg.
u You must be a member of that informal group, MFTOCEM (Men Fixin' Their Own Coffee Every Morning.)
With respect, the fact that you said "zero matches" is the fundamental flaw in your argument. I'm a better than average looking guy, but I'm not Chad Hemsworth or something like that. I've had probably 10 different women ask me out or give me their number or ask for mine this year, and I've been laid up in the house for two weeks so you can't even count that time. None of that involves online dating. Just going out in the real world and talking to real people at real places. "That's not how it's done now"... okay... well that's why the college girls are flirting with me every time I'm on campus and people are at home in the dark complaining they only get swiped the wrong direction. That IS how it's done, because I'm experiencing it regularly and I don't even approach women 9 times out of 10 just for lack of time.
Think about it... if everybody is at home complaining how hard dating is so they aren't out there dating, who do you think is cleaning up because they're the only person on the field? It's not like women are just going to stop dating because the men stayed home to mope.
You're only looking at online stuff, maybe stats. Go out. You'll see PLENTY of ordinary looking, even horrid looking men , with decent women. Even old dudes, married with children.
I feel like it's actually the other way around... there's probably MORE women than men so women have to compete against other women for men.. Some women even STAY with bad men because they think they can't do better. Sad but true. Go out like I said, and come back here and tell me/us what you've observed. Watch people.
I would say dating has always been a competition. I don´t think the issue is that it has become too competitive for guys because women have unrealistic expectations I think the problem is rather that rules and circumstances have changed. In my opinion the problem is rather that the circumstances a guy lives in have changed. The problem is that in a day and age where there is porn, video games and junk food it has become even harder to find a date.
Yes it has become harder but I don´t think it´s too competitive by now.
What's the definition of insanity? Doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result?
Try something different. Keep switching up the approach. But still within the realm of being yourself.
Reality.. dating.. meeting people. You are at the beginning process of wanting to merge a life with another. That is give and take. You both have to make sacrifices. Including looking stupid.
If people don't like your form of stupid along with theirs it's never going to work. It's not just the other persons issues of high standards. You are half of it.
You are never going to be perfect for everyone.
Just realize it and move on yo try the next.
Do yourself a favour and log off. Speak to people in the real world. The internet tricks us into believing small minorities are massive and big beliefs are forgotten. Transgender people are rare, Trump has a huge following, and women today don't have unrealistic expectations.
@wiltingrosepetal Why speak to people in the real world when I find online interaction to be more enjoyable?
@Shiningtempest Well you can't complain about having problems dating if you can't bother to log off long enough to meet someone to date. I know you aren't the OP, but still applies. I meet far more women in real life than I meet online and guess which one it's easier to catfish in?
@JHAYES317 Is it wrong to have standards for a person's physical appearance? I know men who aren't attracted to taller, overweight or older women. People are allowed to have preferences 😭
Oh so you're one of those guys 😃 the argument that women aren't allowed to reject short guys because they can't change their height is mindless. Yes, it's wrong to belittle or mock people based on factors they can't control but you can't help what you're attracted to. It's personally very uncomfortable for me to date a shorter guy. Been on dates like that, it feels like there's an elephant in the room. He's gotta be 6ft or higher, that's my preference, doesn't mean women have sky high standards 😭
That’s not a preference you are just afraid of society judging you. Because if it was really just about the height…then it would just be “taller than you”. The moment a girl puts “6 ft or higher” I know that they just want the social status of dating a guy in the 6 ft club. You’re attracted to social validation…not tall guys lol
Aight
@BoopBoopBeep I don't care if I get catfished. I get more pleasure from online interaction than in the real world. If that means higher chance of getting catfished, that's fine with me. :)
@Shiningtempest I dunno. I mean you do you, of course, but I enjoy sex more than typing, and the former only happens in person.
"He's gotta be 6ft or higher, that's my preference, doesn't mean women have sky high standards"
You are a clueless bimbo. 6ft.+ all ready eliminates 80-85% of men from your consideration.
I don't want to date a guy shorter than me, my dude. I've been on dates like that, I dated a guy like that for a year. It's uncomfortable and I'm not attracted to him if I have to lean down to kiss him 😐 am I not allowed to have this standard?
So you're saying you're 5'11" then? You are allowed to have whatever standards you want, but you also should get a clue and live in reality. Like I said 6'+ eliminates 80%+ of all men from your dating pool and that's before considering whatever other unrealistic standards you naively hold and think aren't "sky high".
Yeah, I'm 5'11. I'm completely fine discarding half of the dating pool because, like I said, I wouldn't feel comfortable dating them. 60% of the citizens in my country are overweight and I constantly hear guys saying they'd never date a woman who was fat. Ah, but that standard is completely fair, isn't it? They don't have sky high expectations, do they? 😒
Geez, you really are a bimbo. On what planet does 80%=half? You're discarding 4/5 of the dating pool. Half would be 5'9" not 6 feet lmao.
Like another guy said and you blew off, fat is at least changeable. A woman can lose weight. And how does other people's unrealistic expectations affect you? Are you trying to tell me that you are unwilling to date 80% of men out of spite because they make stupid decisions as well?
@wiltingrosepetal yeah fat is changeable, and also you are refusing to date shorter because god forbid you have to look down? lol. Grow up
I've never had problems attracting gorgeous women.
I'm not tall, I'm not buff, I don't talk to anyone about my income (nor do these women ask), I don't have a car, and I'm the split bills and eating out 50/50 type, yet very attractive women hit on me fairly often.
If I were not so picky about things like her having to share all my hobbies and interests, her having never drank alcohol or smoked or did any other drugs, her needing to be an atheist, etc, I'd already be married.
In my experience, most attractive women are too easy.
Maybe you just aren't being nice.
Sure, but I’d go a step further and say that it isn’t just competitive.
Men are demonized in society and yet men are forced to still love and empower women? Court them and take them out on dates where he has to pay for everything? Unsure if there will even be a second date? Should there even be a second date when men are demonized yet still forced to love and empower women?
Stop living under the boot of women. It’s not selfish to think about yourself as a man when clearly women think about themselves all of the time
It depends. If you look at a lot of these passport bros when they go overseas to Europe showing off money and status they usually get scammed or robbed. If you're trying to do is show off money and status then yes you're going to get women who only look for money.
But for me I enjoy learning languages as a hobby and I like traveling and studying other cultures. I don't show off any money in places like Norway, Poland, South Korea, Japan, France and I still get women easy. And I am fat too. Why? Because I am showing that actually interested in their culture and not paying money to go overseas hoping to get easy sex because of money or my passport from a western country.
It's the same with women in the US if you just show off money and status you are just going to get women who don't want attract to use you for money and abuse you.
Pick yourself one that doesn't use it. My partner is a stunner, has social media, but she hasn't posted anything in years. None of the posts were attention grabs either. So she isn't one of the spoiled women you speak of, she's got both feet on the ground.
Yes. You got lucky. I didn’t say men can’t get lucky. But you wouldn’t be able to find another girl like her
Depends on where. I can tell you that in the U. S., such as everything else in American culture, it's either one extreme or the other. Trust fund Chad, famous athlete/celebrity/musician? Then you'll get women creaming themselves to get within your area code. Everyone knows that... what people outside the U. S. WOULDN'T expect, is they ALSO go ga ga over deadbeat, small time drug dealer/addict, 5 kids from 4 women, ex con, non child support paying, no job having, ebonics talking, wannabe gangster douchebags. If you're somewhere in between though, which is what most are? You're invisible. Don't even try. Ironically, go across the border to Mexico though, and because their culture is the opposite of the U. S., the in between guys are EXACTLY who they want.
Your still young, wait till your mid 30's. You should be focsing on getting the best body and making $. A lot of women your age just want older men because they bring skills to the table in many different ways. Build your skill set and find a decent career so you can support your self.
Yes because u are competing against a wider range if people but equally have access to view a much higher range of women also then their is the other issue the the numbers for men to women on dating sites are somthing silly like 10-1 so by default their wouldn't be enough women to men even if everyone found a perfect match
Look, there are these girls you mentioned, yes you are right, social media triggered these and increased the number of such people but Not every person is the same, not every woman is the same, that is, there are women who do not believe only what they see on social media, who do not only focus on appearance, who focus on character and search. If you find one of them, your relationship will be fine.
It is competitive for both genders. Everyone these days thinks they deserve those filtered, non existent photoshopped people on instagram. It is pathetic. Whenever they find someone attractive in real life, they don’t pursue because they think “oh I have seen better on ig”
I'd say so. Back in the day we would only have to compete with one guy named Joe a city away. Nowadays we have to compete with every Joe named Joe right there on her phone.
It's so hard to maintain a girl's attention nowadays. They get bored easily knowing they get all the attention.
Dating overall is one sworded mess. Men are checking out because of women's unrealistic expectations pure and simple.
All men want from relationship partners are these 3 things:
1. Respect 🙏
2. Acknowledgement
3. Personal space and understanding boundaries.
From my own perspective, a massive turn off for me is when a guy turns anything into something sexual.
No matter how handsome I consider someone, if things head into a sexual direction too soon, I'm out. I'd much rather continue with someone I can have a nice, valuable and respectful conversation with.
Obviously.
If you look here at 8:52 you can see, that rich men are stealing the available girls from us.
https://www.youtube.com/embed/yMROoi8wigsAndrew Tate also mentions how average boys are invisible to the opposite sex.
https://www.youtube.com/embed/eptW-e6okLg.
Being a single average man is a default standard now.
Depends on what perspective one looks at this. On one hand this will have negative societal consequences like lower birth rates.
On the other women don't have any obligation not to share a single fuckboy and to spread their legs and think about USA for some guy wanting a long term relationship.
Nah otherwise my slighty above average smug face wouldn't get me any likes on apps.
Thinking that only men with a shovel as a jaw are getting dates is wrong.
I’d say you can reverse this and it’s too competitive for women. Men constantly see photoshopped women with plastic surgery and a ton of makeup on social media and compare girls irl to them. Most of us don’t have the money for the surgery they get to look that way. Women used to be more natural looking even the most attractive ones like Marilyn Monroe looked realistic and achievable.
Wrong wrong wrong. Men have such low standards. How can women come up with these petty arguments. What you should say is women feel insecure because all they see is women with perfect bodies
@Peridot25 men go crazy for girls with small breasts you know that even though we like big ones
@Peridot25, Make a poll on here, most men don’t like plastic surgery and would prefer if women were natural. Just because simps like pictures of unrealistic women on Instagram doesn’t mean men as a whole want women to all look the same and fake. I think much of the pressure to have work done is impressed on women from other women.
Read the comments and quote tweets on this:
x.com/.../1759835113137811676
I experienced the reverse of this before where someone accused me of this kind of comparison. In reality I just compared to the kind of people i'd see on an average swimming pool day and still found her super attractive. Sugery makes people look unattractive, I desire a natural beauty.
Its competitive for everyone. If you aren't hot guys skip over you for the typical IG hoes. So I dropped out lol.
Dating Is and has never been a competition. People are not a prize to be won. The sooner you stop thinking like that the better.
Now? Its always been competitive if you're going have pretty girls. Everyone wants them. Its less competitive if you go after girls that aren't pretty. Duh.
Hoeflation is real and the data from dating apps bears that out: 20% of men get 80% of the women. This is a threat to civilization but you fools want to pretend it isn't because you don't want hurt some skanks' feelings.
It ain't hard. There's more single women than ever
No, it is easier than ever. People have so many options now. A guy I work with just met a girl on Facebook.
I went on a dating site and I got turned down and ignored, too. People consider me attractive and nice, too.
I'm average and I have little problem, but I also have no fear of approaching or of rejection. I do not care if I strike out 20 or more times because I know I will get a yes eventually.
If you think it's too competitive then you're probably not very confident and have lower self-esteem.
I'm a short dude and I never really have issues dating, the issue is finding someone that meshes well enough to continue to date.
Competitive is not the first word that comes to my mind when it comes to dating today.
It's not.
I never had problems to find a promising contact, although it can be tedious.
Hoeflation has made dating less attractive to men.
Yeah but you can't give up or you've automatically lost the competition
You want a pretty woman.
Women want a pretty man.
Both have their preferences and definitions.
What's wrong with that
It’s still way easier for a man to find a pretty woman than vice versa
It's not, but the rewards are dropping like a rock.
They have realistic expectations you're just wanting women who are out of your league.
Maybe you should date unattractive women?
Or maybe you should get a better personality?
Do you want help?
It's always been that way if you're a guy
What’s a realistic expectation for a female?
But good for me no?
Too complecated and very shallow now.
I don’t know 💀
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