Is it a big deal that my boyfriend follows bikini girls on instagram?

[Anonymous]

Hi! at first it was liking bikini pictures and he says he stopped but I don't know if it’s true. now he follows them and im still so insecure about it. i’ve told him to stop and he says he’s still going to do it because i can’t control him. i told him it’s a respect thing not controlling him. anyway, I don't know if i am making a big deal that he is following girls it is disrespectful? thank you in advance for your advice.

[Bethany22]

As long as he's spending his time and money on you, then you shouldn't be worried about that. Men need variety in their sexual partners, but most men can fulfill that need simply by looking at pictures of other women, and not actually cheating. As it sounds like he's someone who's really sensitive to being controlled, you now know that the key to him being loyal to you is to let him do whatever he wants, and be loyal to him regardless of the activities he chooses to do. Actually give him lots of options to consider, such as restaurants, etc, so that he never feels restricted in any other part of your lives either.

[MsProsperity]

You’re right

[Apple1996]

Men do not "need" sexual variety 🙄 if they do then they shouldn't be in a serious relationship

[IslaTheWitch]

You can't deny him the right to like or dislike something. You can't tell him what he can or can't do. He is not your kid.

If you feel insecure, don't cast it on him; you have to work on your insecurities. If you want him to consider your feelings, present them properly to him without blaming or demanding. Describe the situation and what emotions it triggers in you. Propose your solution and be ready for negotiations and compromise.

You are not a boss in this relationship. If you want or need something, learn how to ask and negotiate.

[MsProsperity]

Very true. Have you been there?

[IslaTheWitch]

@MsProsperity I'm a free spirit in my relationships, so if my man can't stand that I have male friends, my inner circle of people I knew long before him, that I have no problem with sizing up an attractive man in the suit on the street... he simply won't be my man :D

[MsProsperity]

Give me tips😅😅😅

[IslaTheWitch]

@MsProsperity I have only one - 100% trust, honesty and transparency and a man without insecurities...

[Sevenpointfive]

i see these questions and wonder how the girl knows he's doing it? is spying on his activities any more of a cheating behavior? probably not, but both are deceptive people

[jahaims]

It's up to you to set your own boundaries based on your own morals/values

[MsProsperity]

All men do that, you just need accept it. I’ve been there there’s nothing you can do to change him. If you feel like it’s affecting you, dump him and work on yourself. Though there’s nothing wrong with you, it shows you love him and you want him to focus on you only

[Apple1996]

He's being pathetic. If he already has a girlfriend he shouldn't be wasting time looking at random women in bikinis online. Personally I would have left him

[In_Trance]

no it isn't