Why am I not interested in GIrls?

[GoGetitGio]

I just turned 19 and im a virgin. I had a prom date last year and it almost happened but she decided she didn't want to. I really don't care other than people tease me. I am not really that interested in sex or dating. I work full time at a stock brokage firm I work 10 yours a day mon-thursday. Friday i get to stay at home to study for my test. I study all day Friday and half day saturdays then i have soccer games too. Sunday is my day off. I really have no interest in dating. No im not gay, i find chicks hot I just have not interst in dating or anything? I haven't been on a date or even really talked to a girl since prom last year.. Whats wrong with me?

[Oliverlogan263]

Dude don't stress too much about it. Some guys just aren't into the dating/hookup scene as much when they're younger. Nothing wrong with that. With your busy schedule between work and studying, it makes sense you don't have tons of free time or energy for relationships. Focusing on your career and future is smart at your age.

A few things that may be going on - one, you sound like a loyal, focused guy. Once you commit to something, you really commit. Maybe girls seem like a distraction. Two, you're still young - your priorities will likely shift as you get older and more comfortable in your own skin. Three, you could just be slow to warm up to romance and that's fine.

Instead of labeling yourself or worrying what people think, I'd say keep an open mind but don't force it. Work on being a good friend to girls, get comfortable talking to them without expectations. The right person will come along when you're really ready. In the meantime, own who you are - not being into hookup culture doesn't mean there's something wrong with you, bro!

[GoGetitGio]

I like girls like I find them hot!! I just suck at talking to them I get so nervous

[Oliverlogan263]

Ah man, I feel your nerves. Talking to hot girls is intimidating! But don't sweat it so much - chicks can sense when a dude is nervous and it's not a huge turn off if you own it. Here's some tips:

- Smile and make eye contact. Looking confident even if you don't feel it goes a long way.

- Comment on something context-appropriate, like what she's wearing or what's going on around you. Just a simple "I like your shirt" breaks the ice.

- Ask questions to get to know her. People love talking about themselves so steer convo that way at first until you relax.

- Relax your posture - don't look all tense. Stand up straight but keep it loose and don't cross your arms.

- Listen when she talks and ask follow ups. Nothing's sexier than a guy who seems interested in what she says.

- Have fun with it! Flirt a little and tease her back if she teases you. Laugh at yourself too if you mess up - shows you don't take yourself too seriously.

- Exchange numbers if the convo goes well. Text her later about something you talked about as an excuse to see her again.

The more you put yourself out there, the less nervous you'll get. Fake the confidence at first if needed - these tips will make you seem cooler than you think. You got this bro, just go for it!

[GoGetitGio]

That’s awesome thanks so much! I’m the one with the crazy mom from the other thread and I’m like I can’t even talk to a chick without getting super nervous I definitely can’t get a date lol how are these guys banging my mom on day one. Like how do they impress a girl so quickly, ya know?

[Oliverlogan263]

Ugh dude I feel ya, that situation with your mom is beyond messed up. As for how guys get with girls so fast, here are some guesses:

- Confidence is key - even if it's fake. Act like you know what you're doing and you own the room. Girls eat that up.

- Compliment them genuinely but keep it casual. "Love your smile" not "nice tits". Make her feel good without coming on strong.

- Listen to what she says and ask follow up questions. Girls love a dude who actually listens when they talk.

- Have a sense of humor. Tease her a little, make jokes, and laugh easily. Light and fun vibes are attractive.

- Touch her arm when you laugh together. Small physical clues you're into her but not creepy. Eases the tension.

- Invite her out ASAP. To grab a drink that night if you vibe, not a multi-week "date". Seals the deal faster.

You'll get there bro, just fake it till you make it. And PLEASE don't let your mom situation mess with your head - that's on her, not you. You seem like a great guy, you'll find an awesome girl one day, I know it!

[GoGetitGio]

Thank you soo much. I’m not even that stressed about lot getting chicks. I just don’t like being teased about it ya know? Like I honestly don’t care I don’t like being the bittvof jokes like gio can’t get a chicks Gio is gonna be 40Year old virgin. Like I’m not concerned about it but the teading is sooo annoying

[Oliverlogan263]

Yeah man I totally get that. Being teased all the time would get annoying as hell. Your friends busting your balls is one thing, but if people who barely know you are getting in on it too, that's just lame.

Next time someone cracks a virgin joke, just be like "haha very original" and roll your eyes. Or hit them with a comeback like "at least I'm not desperate like you losers".

Flip it around on them and don't let them see it bugs you. Once the teasing stops getting a reaction, they'll probably lose interest.

And don't sweat what other people think - what matters is living your life for you. You do you bro, and the right girl will come along when the time is right.

Till then, keep doing your thing and tuning out the haters. You got this! Don't let em bring you down over something so trivial. Stay strong!

[Truthatanycost]

You could be Asexual. In any case my advice to you is to completely ignore what others think, say or do. Only focus on what you want to do and your life purpose and your eternal purpose. When you live truthfully, life is peaceful.

[GoGetitGio]

Thank you that’s solid advice

[DishLady]

It’s not your time yet, bud. You’re only 19. Be patient with yourself.

[GoGetitGio]

Thanks! Most of my friends are girl crazy tho 🤷‍♂️

[DishLady]

Let them do them. You do you.

[GoGetitGio]

Good idea.. how you doing?

[DishLady]

👍🏼

[Shedzij567]

Dude someone will come your way

[GoGetitGio]

Are you single?

[Nikki1989]

You are overthinking this far too much. If things are going to happen, they will.

This is a NON ChatGPT opinion.

[GoGetitGio]

Agreed. You look nice! Do you have a boyfriend?

[BarryLiverstone]

You are lacking friends

[GoGetitGio]

I have a few friends. What?

[BarryLiverstone]

And make more friends. The more social contacts you have the better your chances

[GoGetitGio]

Why?

[BarryLiverstone]

It comes down to experience and comfort. Right now you are nervous around girls because you don’t have many friends. Adding more friends (some of which are girls) and you have more opportunities to talk to them and relax. Also the girls see you as a good guy who can make friends and see value in that.

Why don’t you want to make new friends?

[GoGetitGio]

I have friends at work and Al from high school/soccer! Why do you keep saying I have no friends

[BarryLiverstone]

I’ve never said you have no friends. I said to add friends and expand your social network.

The very fact you are reacting to my advice as if I am somehow attacking you is troubling. Better to step back and see that more friends would be helpful in your life.

[GoGetitGio]

How did I react like you were attacking me?

[BarryLiverstone]

“I have friends at work and Al from high school/soccer! Why do you keep saying I have no friends”

You used an exclamation point which indicates anger. You assumed that I was implying you had no friends. Overall it felt very defensive and not thankful

[BarryLiverstone]

If that wasn’t how you felt. Then I am giving you feedback that’s how it was perceived.

[GoGetitGio]

No it doesn’t indicates emphasis

[BarryLiverstone]

God Bless

[GoGetitGio]

Thanks you too