On the first date, does the man pay the bill or do they pay the bill together? ?

Question

The man must pay

MrOracle · Accepted Answer

You are expecting traditional treatment. Are you a traditional woman? If so, then you absolutely qualify for traditional treatment, but if not, then you don't.

Men paying for dates became a social expectation at a time when most women didn't work outside the home. They weren't out competing with men in the job market and diluting the job market, which meant that wages were higher because they needed to support an entire family on a single wage.

It was also a time when women married in their late teens or early 20s and gave their husbands children, and stayed at home to raise them and take care of the home, husband, and kids while he earned all the money for the family. Of course, many women would go back to school or started a career once the youngest kid was in school full time

If this sounds like you (any woman reading this), then you probably are traditional and qualify for traditional treatment. If, however, you are a career-first Feminist who is demanding equality and think you are going to put off a serious relationship and kids until your mid 30s, then you should expect to pay your own way, even on a first date, because that's what equality looks like.

PapaJedi · Accepted Answer

Long time I last dated but I always pay the bill and a gift after the date :) feels good on both sides

Sunnysunny123 · Accepted Answer

I think the man should pay but i always let them chose a place and if they insist on me choosing i always go for a casual cafe whith normal prices also i ALWAYS offer to pay for both but it has never happened.
I am also someone that when in a relationship i don't split the bill either i pay the bill or he does (we split rent and bills).

I don't think there is a point in going to fancy expensive places on the first date.

Apple1996 · Accepted Answer

I'm a feminine women so I'll leave the man to pay

OlderAndWiser · Answer

When you say that the man "must" pay, there is no legal requirement for that and many people of your generation expect to pay their own way on a first date. Saying that the guy "must" pay makes you sound entitled, and that is not a good image to project.

For my generation, we have traditions that are quite old fashioned but they work very well. A guy pays for dates. When they get married, she takes care of the babies and he earns the money. She cooks and he takes care of the cars and carries out the garbage. These traditional roles have always worked very well with us. Your generation could have followed our example, but you have chosen to do things your way. How is that working out for you?

V_Injector · Answer

women must pay... always. I won't go out at all unless you offer to pay for everything.

I mean I don't even want to go out with you... make it worth it. Convince me that spending time with you out and about is worth it.

Otherwise, I'm just fine without going out. You can suck my dick while I watch Netflix.

ItsaMeMaik · Answer

Phew, that question. Well, if a woman doesn't assume that I'll pay for everything and that everything will be OK, then I'm happy to pay. But if a woman insists because she thinks it's her right as a woman, then I'll pay not on principle. For me, it's nothing to do with the cost, but with mutual respect.

msc545 · Answer

The man pays as expected unless he never wants to see her again and doesn't care what she says about him to others.

Some men make the terrible mistake of believing a woman's "let me help with that" offer. That offer is a trap that is only a trap if a man accepts it. He is *expected* to politely decline it and men accept it only at their own peril.

BullShark · Answer

If it's a romantic date which could possibly lead to something more, he's the one who suggested it, they're both interested in each other and he wants to impress her, then yes, it's polite if he pays the bill.

If they're just friends, there's nothing going on between them and they're platonic, they should split the bill equally, and he isn't entitled to pay for her. It's just two friends hanging out for breakfast/lunch/dinner. Why should he pay for her like that unless she's broke?

GoodGuyBreakingBad · Answer

I have no problem paying for a girl on a date, all my ex-gfs I paid for them when we went on a date.

Anonymous · Answer

traditional men pay for traditional women. that's it feminists can go the equality route

Fireguy17 · Answer

I will usually pay, but some women insist on paying which I am fine with, or we each pay for half.
No use in starting a range war over it.
If you discuss it beforehand that helps avoid the awkwardness when the bill comes.

Bklynbadboy12 · Answer

I always pay so if your going out with me be prepared to be treated the was a woman should be treated

Gerard567890 · Answer

I am old fashioned. I love to pay for my girl.

idonotlikeyou · Answer

We live in the 21st century. Women get an education and have jobs, everyone pays for themselves, and there are no misunderstandings.

summiter · Answer

Whoever took the initiative and asked the other one out should pay the first time.

Fistiklidondurma27 · Answer

Definitely the man if he wants a second date

Serkee · Answer

Men being expected pay for dates is an outdated custom from before women entered the workforce. Don't expect your man to be traditional if you're not traditional yourself.

LiamJHayden · Answer

The question gets asked a lot on here. I always answer the same way: The  asker  should at least offer to pay.

Jennz6 · Answer

If a man asks me to go on a date with him then he pays

HelpfulWoman · Answer

split equally. anything else (unless previously discussed and agreed) is just dodgy trash humans being gold diggers

DrPepper12 · Answer

Man should pay but if she insists on dutch and is adamant, fine! If that was a "test" then fuck her. Nobody's got time for that scene!

andreasderjuengere · Answer

Man ''must'' nothing. But when (some) women feel better to get paid for services (company, or more) then let it be.

Reijen · Answer

I typically pay first, unless she is super insistent on going Dutch.

anonguys · Answer

I’ve always paid, but I guess the person who asked should probably be the one to do so. In most cases that would be the guy for the most part.

dragoblack · Answer

Pay separate, unless he offers to pay for the entire date. Every date should be gone into with the intent of paying for yourself, otherwise it will come off as a yellow or red flag.

jojouzumaki · Answer

Definitely split. If it’s my idea to meet I’m paying.

bowenw · Answer

Whoever asked the other one out on the date.

llorando · Answer

Ideally both pay for their own meal, or the very least, who ever did the asking out pays.

sawno · Answer

Pay together unless the man wants to pay.

tpskchats · Answer

Well I paid for my date not as formality but as a gesture of good will... Does that qualify?

itsannalee · Answer

My man always pays bills until now.

Nikki1989 · Answer

Generally, the man should pay.

Astarlessnightsky · Answer

Whatever, just talk about it before you order.

sirderpsalot123 · Answer

I think men should pay

eagle1951 · Answer

in my days the Man always payed

mandyfire98 · Answer

Always split

Hispanic-Cool-Guy · Answer

Speaking for myself I'll pay.

BarryLiverstone · Answer

I’ll pay the first date

OtterMan68 · Answer

If the man asked the woman out, he pays.

Jackson2005 · Answer

I’m gay, so it gets split 🤪

Update_Available · Answer

Depends on date's quality

LunarEclipse433 · Answer

I always pay

Anonymous · Answer

Guy obv

paledreams · Answer

Must split bill 💵💸

jahaims · Answer

Why should he pay?

chocolatetwopointo · Answer

they both pay

On the first date, does the man pay the bill or do they pay the bill together? ?

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What Girls & Guys Said

I have no problem paying for a girl on a date, all my ex-gfs I paid for them when we went on a date.

On the first date should man and women split the bills or man pay the bills?

On the first date, does the man pay the bill or do they pay the bill together? ?

Most Helpful Opinions

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

I have no problem paying for a girl on a date, all my ex-gfs I paid for them when we went on a date.

On the first date should man and women split the bills or man pay the bills?

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