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Poll Result
Voted 37 times in total
Honestly you should stop dating her , it happened to me a few times with girls’ that made it seem like she was single with no kids , and then when you start to get closer to her , she finally confesses she has a kid , I’m sorry , if she can’t be honest with you from the very beginning , think about other things she won’t be honest about as well with you , if you choose to continue dating her. That right there is a huge red flag that you shouldn’t ignore because it shows what kind of person she truly is , if she can’t be honest about having a child from the beginning? that means she won’t be honest about other things as well, do yourself a favor and stay clear of that shit man. She is trying to hook line and sink you. I dated a girl for a few weeks , we were having so much fun together , and we’re having tons of sex , out of nowhere she tells me she has something to confess , she said I have a kid and I’m sorry I didn’t tell you , I just really liked you and didn’t want to lose my chance with you. I said you wouldn’t of , if you told me the truth from the very beginning , but you clearly lied to me , because I asked you this question before we started dating, and you told me you didn’t have kids ‘ but now you do? Hmmmm so You are a liar and I’m sorry I don’t stick with liars. I told her the next guy she meets , she should be honest about it from the very beginning , she then tried convincing me it wouldn’t be an issue , that the Dad was still in the picture and she has split custody , I said your child isn’t the issue , you are , I can’t stand lying selfish girls’ and sadly man there are a lot of them out there.
Depends on multiple factors.
1. Did we bring up the talk about having/wanting kids and she lied me in the face and said she doesn't have one? -> bye
2. We never talked about it and I dont really want to date a woman who has kids -> bye
3. We never talked about it and I dont mind beeing with a women who has kids -> its allright.
In the end I think you're saving a lot of time for yourself and the guy you date if you mention having kids right away either during texting or on the first date. And feel way more secure too if you know the guy you date doesn't mind.
Wow! The options to choose from... tell her bye or accept the deception. Like really? Is being a single mom a crime? There ain't nothing wrong witholding that information until further in the dating process. U expect someone to lay everything on the table on the first date? And their ain't nothing wrong dating a single mom. Accept the woman for who she is.
I don't see any issue with this. It's best for women to not share to much info on the first few dates. Like most people would never share their address on the first date for safety reasons so why not do the same for kids? She wants the man dating her for who she is. Not for her kids, where she lives or anything else like that
Whether you have kids is not a specific identifiable piece of information like an address. And she should want to know whether the guy she is on a date with is going to be OK with her being a single mom so she doesn't waste her time or his. Besides, I'm not sure how long you can cover something like that up without a guy figuring it out.
Whether you deceived someone and withheld an important piece of info people use in deciding whether to date someone isn’t going to matter if there’s only one or two dates, but if your goal is a relationship, you will torpedo that with a person you really like and want to go exclusive with when they find out.
Your last name is a personally identifiable piece of information that someone doesn’t need to know initially and it is not information that decides whether you’d date someone.
In short, you’re probably going to miss out on that special person if you deceive them about having kids. He’s generally going to believe you deceived him because you knew most guys wouldn’t want to date a single mom and he’s going to wonder what else you would lie about.
Well, what I would take out of that is that there trust issues, communication issues, and a lack of candor. All of those things are relationship dealbreakers as far as I’m concerned.
If she can’t at least tell me she has kids (she doesn’t need to tell me how many, their ages, and their gender) will reasonably conclude she’s not an honest person. And that’s a total dealbreaker.
Apparently you’ve never heard of lying by omission. But you didn’t answer the question- would you refuse to answer that you have kids if directly asked, would you lie and say you don‘t, or would you tell the truth?
I’m not worried I’ll be dating my cousins, LOL. What kind of tiny rural area do you come from?
I simply would not answer any personal questions. If I'm dating someone they should want my soul and get to know that before getting to know random information about me.
And wtf no you know I've moved around my whole life. Where I live now is a bit small but I haven't even been here a year yet 😅
I think your social circle is quite a bit different than mine. I am around a lot more people your age and even younger than you assume.
And that friend of yours that dated multiple men while pregnant isn’t relationship material, to put it politely. The fact she did what she did tells me all I need to know.
Being worried you might be dating a cousin of yours- seriously, Apple?
It doesn't matter who you hang around. You are talking about dating like my dad would lol
And my friend is engaged so it worked out for her 🤷♀️
My family is big this is a worry. Thankfully with my husband race being completely different than mine this was easily identifiable that he was not related 🤣
Lol, no one’s family is so big that would be a concern in anything but the most remote rural and provincial places.
You make the mistaken and provincial assumption everyone is like you and your social circle. The dysfunction you describe is nothing to
aspire to and encourage.
When I was in the military, women like your friend were a dime a dozen, hoping to get some simp to marry them. Never happened, though- they did, however, get run through to the point they were standard issue for new arrivals to the unit.
I met my friend at church. She would never be ran through lol wtf 😂 also she isn't military or anything like that.
And jeez I can tell you are old military. Most of these guys don't sleep around like that anymore. Imagine the incel basement dweller type but they acutally have a job 😂
Opinion
14Opinion
u Did she lie to you or was the subject not discussed?
This didn't happen to me. This question was derived from a comment made by another GAGer, who said she wouldn't tell a guy she had kids until the fifth date.
I have dated single mothers and had no big problems, but I would not date any girl who thought she had a sufficient justification for lying to me.
Well what am I supposed to do then if I want to be her number one but she already has a kid? That kid is going to be her number one, not me. No matter how much I sacrifice or love her, she will always value and love that kid more than me.
And I'm supposed to just be content with that? When I want to give myself fully and have somebody else return the favor?
Wonder why she did not tell me earlier. I have dated single moms and they were great experiences.
Let's put this back on you.
Did you ever bother to ask her at any time on those 5 dates when you were going through what I did on my summer vacation history if she had kids?
It's not a bad question to ask if things like that are important to you.
Since you never asked she didn't think it was a big deal.
If you did ask and she lied now it is a big deal.
This question wasn't derived from any experience I have had. It was derived from a discussion on another thread where a female GAGer said she wouldn't tell a guy she had kids until the fifth date.
Depends on what you are looking for, keeping it a secret for 5 dates would be the red flag for me not the being a single mom
I think it would depend why she didn't disclose that to begin with. It's kind of an important fact about her don't you think. Most women would want you to know that up front I'd think to avoid wasting eachother's time.
I'd learn to ask better questions on the first four dates
I'd wonder why I was learning this on the fifth date.
I'm happy to date a single mom, but she can't hide it.
I know a beautiful and wholesome young woman who is a single mom and loves it
Damn...
What if a guy waited until the fifth date to mention that he is a felon and lost his drivers license?
Women wouldn’t just say “well I didn’t ask so it’s okay..”
That sounds like a lie by omission...
I would still date her
ha. no.
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