Apparently he doesn't like our friends anymore?

[Anonymous]

I asked my boyfriend if he wanted to eat after work. When I listed who was going he cringed at our friends name and said he'd pass because she was going. He said it's because she's been negative work wise but I think the negativity is reasonable.

I won't credit her for us being together but she do think she did have a hand in us initially meeting and she played wing-woman for me prior to our first date.

Is this something I should ignore or should I tried to mend the issue.

He's refered to her as a friend, fairly recently. They've been able to sit and carry a conversation when I leave the room and have enough in common to maintain a friendship without my presence.

[SteveSmith1985]

I don't think there's anything you can do. He can stop liking her, while you don't feel that way.

It's not something to control. There is nothing to mend (that you included here anyway). So, you have to allow him to feel however he feels. You'll have to come to compromises about how often he's forced to see her to allow you and her to maintain your friendship. But... it's going to strain your friendship, or your relationship. (or both).

I don't know how long, or close either the friendship or relationship might be. But you can't fix this. You're going to have to accommodate to it as best as you're able. Trying to fix this is liable to cause more problems than it solves.

It's a shitty situation for sure. But it's out of your control. He's gonna feel how he's gonna feel. The history getting you two together isn't going to have any affect on how he feels.

[Nikki1989]

Try to understand his specific reasons without immediately dismissing them. What exactly about her negativity bothers him?

[Asker]

She is trained in several departments. They keep putting her in his department. It happens to be the one she dislikes the most. It's also over staffed. And it's the most physical. She's told management she'd rather not work the department unless they really need her. And the typically don't actually need her, they send people home early daily because they're overstaffed and still hiring.