My friends called me a traitor when I’m starting to go out with another guy when I knew our guy friends liked me for year. Am I wrong for this?

[Anonymous]

We’ll I started my new job about two months ago and it’s going okay. I met this guy during lunch break and we just started talking. Then for the next couple weeks we’ve been chatting. He asked me out in a date and I thought about it and then said yes why not. So that Friday night we went out for dinner and it was great. A week later we had our second date. I didn’t tell my friends yet because I wanted to see how things go. He said he would like to go on more dates with me. We’re planning a third date. I finally decided to tell my besties about it.

My best friends (let’s call them Anna and Alexa) was like shocked. Anna said, “Wow that’s very cool. You didn’t tell us you were seeing someone.”
I told her we’ll I wanted to wait until the right time and they both asked what he what he was like and what he does.
Alexa asked, “Is he special needs like we are?” I said I don’t even know.
We’re all autistic but high functioning. My besties have boyfriends but they’re also special needs.
Anyways one of them asked, “Wait a minute how does (our guy friend) feel about this. Did you tell HIM about you’re seeing another guy?”

I froze. Then I said, “Um…. I’ll tell him soon but I’m sure he doesn’t feel anyway about this and we’re just friends. Why would he know?”

They both looked at me and said, “Are you kidding us! Come on! He OBVIOUSLY likes you. And he even said you were his “girlfriend” when your dad asked if he had a girlfriend. I told him he was joking around. We’re just friends.
Anna said, “Well did you tell him that you don’t feel the same way because he’s going to be REALLY hurt.” He knows we’re just friends and I told him straight. Alexa said, “Traitor! This boy likes you for YEARS and you took him for granted and NOW you’re seeing another man? You stringed him along. He’s going to be really hurt you know. You need to tell him and let the guy you’re dating know.”

Why would I tell my date? Am I wrong for dating?

Updates

1 y

Plus if my guy friend still likes me for years, he would have made a move and asked me out on real dates by now or call or text a lot? I know we went to dances together twice but as friends. Even my parents know he likes me.

[ohsheeT]

I don't even know you and I call you smart. A leader and someone that knows what she wants

[Asker]

What’s that supposed to mean?

[HighValue]

You knew he liked you and that is why you didn't tell him when you told your other friends. Just do him a favor and end the friendship instead of keeping him around as a backup option like many bad women do.

[Asker]

He’s not a back up option! I’m not even a traitor! Why would you say he’s a back up option? So you agree that my friends said k a traitor? My guy friend hasn’t done anything to show that he likes me. He never asks me for it on dates, calls or texts me everyday so what does that tell you? I mean he texts me sometimes. I’m allowed to date whoever want. My best friend told me sternly that doesn’t even matter. I knew he likes me for years and I stringed him along and I’m seeing another guy behind his back. We’re not even dating!!!

[HighValue]

End the friendship. It will be better for him in the long run. Many women keep guy "friends" because it makes them feel better knowing they are an option if nobody else wants them. He probably limes likes you a lot and is too worried about being hurt emotionally if you reject him and that is why he hasn't asked you on a date.
Just make a decision. Either date your friend, or date the new guy and end the friendship.

[Asker]

I mean I understand but I shouldn’t have to hold off dating or keep rejecting guys because of my guy friend. I would never string him along. But my friends say I do

[slatyb]

No, date whoever you like. Make new friends. Yours are weird

[Asker]

Thank you! I did NOT betray my guy friend. He didn’t make a move so….. he can’t get mad. Plus I only like him as a friend.