How soon can I ask her out? Her boyfriend just died.

anabur
This is such a tricky situation...

I'd been thinking about this girl I hadn't seen in a few years, we worked together and I always really liked just being around her. At the time we got along really good and I thought there was something there but she had a bf. Well I mentioned her to a mutual friend this week and found out her boyfriend just killed himself within the last few weeks.

I had already intended to go home and find her on Facebook or Myspace, and still did but I didn't mention that I'd heard what happened. She wrote me that she was really glad I found her, and that she was okay but had been better. I told her I'd heard about it, and then just kind of told her a few funny stories about people she knows, assuming she needs someone around who isn't trying to make her talk about it. I've told her I'm there if she needs someone to talk to, and then I left it at that.

She's an amazing girl and like I said, she'd been on my mind because I'd been thinking "I really want this girl back in my life." Obviously I wouldn't be trying to get myself into this mess if it was just a casual "She's pretty cool, I'd date her" situation.

I know it's inappropriate to think about asking her to do something with me now (even just as friends), and I respect that, but I still know I like her and at some point it'll be okay to ask her out. But when? I feel like a jerk to even be asking it, but I want to know what girls (or guys) say.

I'm really NOT trying to be disrespectful about what happened. I'm trying to just be honest with myself (and you), and it's one of those situations where I'm too caught up on it to see clearly. To be honest, I'm willing to give her all the time she needs and even just be friends at first...but I'd hate to be SO respectful that it backfires...

So yeah, I'd appreciate hearing what anyone thinks
Updates
+1 y
I sent her a message that we should go to the zoo. She wrote back sounding excited because she hasn't been to the zoo in forever. She said she works a lot and doesn't really have money (usually excuses not to do something) but "we can work around it."
Updates
+1 y
She moved, no need to answer the question
How soon can I ask her out? Her boyfriend just died.
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