My boyfriend had sex with his ex the night we broke up; he didn't tell me until after we got back together?

I love my boyfriend very much and we broke up for 5 days anyway the day we broke up his ex girlfriend called him for a ride and he went to her house and had sex with her.He told me a month after we made up.I feel stupid and I can't seem to get over it I don't know what to do he didn't cheta but I feel he showed no respect for me by having sex with her just hours after we broke up.She is friends with some of his friends while most of his friends hate her.Is this something to forgive or do you think I should just walk away from it.I love him so much but when I look at him now that's all I think about is him having sex with her.

  • Work it out with him
    Vote A
  • Leave him because he may still hook up with her
    Vote B
  • Leave and forget it
    Vote C
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Updates:
I just found out his best friend since they were 3 years old is getting married to her best friend so there is going to be plenty of times when him and his ex will see each other I don't think I can work this out it sucks but if she wants him back she has help from her best friend and his. :(

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Most Helpful Guy

  • If you don't have trust in a relationship, then you are missing the important benefit of being in a relationship, which is the feeling of security. I think that you should take things very slow with your boyfriend until you are over this and feel that he can be trusted again. Easily accepting that he cheated and forgiving him could be to the detriment of him losing respect for you, because it may make you appear gullible or have low self worth. Look out for yourself first by slowing things down to take precautionary measures to avoid being hurt again.

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What Guys Said 13

  • Technically, he didn't cheat, but if he is capable of having sex just hours after he broke up with you, it says that his feelings for you wee not that deep. Also, he told you one month later for one of two possible reasons: either he told you because he felt guilty (meaning he told you so you can feel worse but he can feel better) or he is hoping that you will break up with him so that he need not feel guilty about hurting you (twisted logic, I know.)

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  • He didn't cheat, but it didn't take him long. Meaning he probably had her on his mind even while he was with you.

    If I broke up my girlfriend and that very same night, she slept with an ex then she probably was never really over him and had him on her mind more often than not. I would cut all ties with her and not look back.

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  • Oh! My! God! (Janice reference)

    Have you seen Friends (the TV series)? This guy is exactly like Ross Geller and the famous quote "We were on a break". I have nothing to say to help your situation, but I'm currently watching the series and reading this was a great coincidence.

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  • Better to work it out with him if it's a problem for you. But you were broken up, so ya... but it is stupid for a guy to jump right to someone that fast.. but it might be him trying to deal with grief then? I dunno. I don't think I'd be able to forgive a girl if she did that though... it does seem disrespectful and ya... immature.

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  • Um... you two were broken up, and he was probably feeling emotionally down.

    He didn't cheat! Be sensible.

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What Girls Said 16

  • From this day forward, as long as he shows Proof in your own sweet pudding, tha the can Be trusted and is not going back for second helpings with the ghost from his past, then Work it out in your own head, to put this to bed And... Forgive and try hard to Forget.
    It is You whom he is back in the saddle with now. And as difficult as it is to try and put this behind you, Annie, do not get your guns until you would see a smoking gun that he is riding bareback with her again.
    Good luck. xx

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  • He sounds emotionally and verbally abusive. You don't have to put up with it. Yes, he is playing mind games. Get out unless you want this type of things to continue.

    He will blow up at you then act super nice and things will be find for a while, then he'll blow up again, cheat on you etc etc...

    I hope you get wise before you suffer too much.

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  • Well he did not cheat. You broke up. So The ex is always the old toy. And in genereal ex bitches is the easiest way to get a vagina support so, don't freak out about her. She has beeing used. If you love him, tell him that this will never happens again, If it does is gonna be the worse act of his life because He is going to loose you ;)

    Hope you be fine

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    • "ex bitches is the easiest way to get a vagina support"

      What kind of sentence is that? lol

  • You broke up for 5 days? Lol and he got straight with her the day you guys broke up? What are you in high school?
    Leave him, he obviously had the hook up in mind before hand

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  • you need to let him go "for now" tel him you have to let him go b.c of what he did and you need time for YOU no text,no calls, no Facebook no communication if he calls keep it short hey I'm fine then I have to go OK bye. That's it! If he loves you HE WILL COME BACK TO YOU AND SAY HOW HE REALLY FEELS AND WHY HE DID WHAT HE DID!

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