Is he testing me by doing this? acts like nothing happened.

[Anonymous]

I just met this guy (29) and we have met up only a few times, but the dates were great, and he recently kissed me for the first time- it was soft slow kissing, not just a peck, but he wasn't all over me either.

The next day, he initiates conversation through text, but acts like the kiss never happened and randomly said that on NYE I should kiss so-and-so (this other guy who he knows is into me) for being really sweet to me. I was taken aback, and probably didn't answer it correctly (I gave him a stiff-ish answer like, I'll do what I want with my kisses, thank you). After which he replied "fair enough" and when we ended our conversation shortly after, he was so nonchalant, saying "talk to you later, see ya".

His attitude seems so distant and it sounds like he's not even interested in me. I don't know if he was trying to get a rise out of me, or what? Why talk to me at all then, if he didn't have anything else to say but these things that make me feel like he's disinterested?

[Anonymous]

Um okay...

I hate to say this, but that's not a good sign. No guy who was really into you would ever play it like that, even as a test, because there's just too much on the line.

The only kind of guys who play those kind of mind games are players. And a player wouldn't be testing you to actually find out how you feel, because he probably had a good enough idea before the kiss. He's just messing with you at this point to draw you into his game.

If he's not a player, then I suppose there's also the possibility that the guy is actually really good friends with the guy he wants you to kiss on NYE, and he feels he messed up the guy code by kissing you because he never wanted to get serious with you to begin with.

Finally, there's the possibility that the kiss really didn't mean anything to him. Some guys just randomly kiss girls without it meaning anything. Or maybe he didn't think it meant anything but then he realized that you might think it does, and so now he's trying to make you forget about it. He's just trying to move past it and go back to the way things were before he kissed you.

Eh...in short, either he's a player or you're in the friendzone.

[bassplayerguy]

Perhaps he was embarrassed that he kissed you? You don't say how you responded to his kiss. Perhaps he was suggesting that you kiss the other guy, hoping you'd say something like, "why would I kiss him, when I know what a great kisser you are!"

Perhaps he was testing you... It's in your court now.

[csa27]

Do you try to hide your interest in him? He may have gotten the feeling that you weren't all that into him from the time you kissed so he is starting to move on. Maybe mention sometime that you enjoyed the kiss and want some more.