Is it smart to not take on manager/leader type responsibilities when you are a subordinate?

[Anonymous]

So i wanna be promoted... For the check and to learn and grow. I am a very hardworker. Its retail. I dont give a damn if i was sweeping a floor id likely put in more effort than most if not all the people i currently work with including the bosses 😂. It is what it is. I like working. I like growing. Period. A lot of people seem to be lazy and content sliding by doing as little as humanly possible to perform the tasks they are hired for.
Even one who did the job well was simultaneously sexually harassing all and sundry because he is a top tier multitasking psychopath. He got promoted recently to a position totally unrelated to his previous one.

Now I work with a girl who acts like the defactor manager. She takes on more responsibility than our managers do for the team getting their work done successfully. I would like to spend a day in one of my managers shoes to see why this has occurred. Bottom topping/role reversal.. Is strange to me. I actually respect my superiors and do not try to take on tasks i was not assigned. Now yes this might end up getting Defacto promoted before me. Sure. These leaders are not all working with a full deck. Lazy, don't care; the possible reasons are probably a long list.

[SteveSmith1985]

My first question is what country you're in?

Because... yea... the girl who seems to be the 'defacto' manager because she's taking on responsabilities beyond those usually assigned without anyone asking her to WILL get promoted over the "super-hard-worker" who stays in her lane. Every time! That's definitely true.

Either I'm misunderstanding this situation, or... you've got the completely wrong idea of "how to get promoted to management". This girl WILL get promoted over you. She is demonstrating her MANAGEMENT skills (as opposed to "ability and willingness to work hard and to work well").

[Asker]

I feel like leaders should chose to cultivate people who have traits like willingness to learn and hardworking. Not people who are taking on things other than their role. I would feel odd going up to the boss saying Ok we need to do XYZ so the team can work better. Like thats the LEADERS job.

[Asker]

I mean what kind of leader is sitting back waiting for someone else to lead? That is illogical to me.

[SteveSmith1985]

Your logic is very much NOT the way anyone else sees it. That's the logic of "the good worker" . The other girl is going to be successful according to the logic that is used to promote workers to management positions. They want to see initiative, that you can think on your feet and that you are flexible enough, and intelligent enough to figure out what needs to be done and get it done.

I feel really badly for you because you clearly work very hard, and are clearly dedicated to doing your work well. But... unless you're able to re-examine your (in this case) faulty logic... your hard work is going to be eclipsed by people who do what this other girl is doing--SHOWING that she can DO the management job... by defacto DOING it. I'm afraid you're just dead wrong on this.

[Asker]

My boss recently said i take pride in my work and that we need more people like me. I appreciated it but actions show otherwise. Ms Defacto gets all the tasks that move her up (this time I am talking about actually being assigned higher tasks) and I get what? Some pat on the back. I am calm in stressful fast pace times and do the work. I don't call out. The other girl is a huge gossip, sexually flirts with everyone, is always talking (its very irritating)... I mean... If i saw that as a leader, it wouldn't matter that she can perform tasks well. Nonetheless i have seen a sexual and emotional harasser (of me) get promoted quickly. I briefly mentioned him in the original question description.
To me it is shameful that it seems like its not doing hard work or being flexible etc that gets rewarded. Its that PLUS being a selfish sexual harasser who is loud and charming and fills every room with hot air.

[Asker]

To me its about whats right. A leader doesn't sit back waiting for others to do their job. I'm also not an ass kisser. I dont go to work to hit on everyone.

[SteveSmith1985]

Now I wasn't in any way trying to justify the sexual harassment aspect. That to me is a whole other, separate issue. That is wrong in every way, and it's unjustifiable. That is just plain wrong, and I'm sorry you had to watch the guy who treated you that way get promoted. I'm not trying to say that's ok. It's not.

WHat I was taking issue with was that you seemed to be thinking "If I stay in my lane, and do the work within that lane exceptionally well, then that should lead to promotion".

What I'm taking issue with, specifically, is the "staying in your lane" part of it. It seemed to me that you were saying that this other girl was actually taking on roles and responsabilities beyond what she was assigned or beyond her 'usual' job. In other words she was NOT 'staying in her lane.' she was showing her management skills BY DOING parts of the management job on her own initiative. That is true. That girl will get promoted over someone who does an exceptional job but shows no willingness/initiative to take on more responsabilities BEYOND that.

It's not that willigness to learn and being hard-working are not going to be valued. They are. But they are, again, WORKER skills rather than management skills. Your boss ends up thinking of you as "a great worker who works hard" more than they think "this girl would be a good manager". It's like you're missing the other half of the equasion, you've shown them you are hardworking, willinig to learn, take pride in your job etc etc. I have no doubt that they've noticed this. But what makes someone stand out as "management material" is... when they seem to naturally have the leadership skills to essentially "start managing" things beyond their official job description or authority.

If there was an emergency and your bosses all had to leave things in the employees hands. You want to be the OBVIOUS choice for who they leave in charge while they're gone. Like if it was a split-second decision your bosses had to make.

[SteveSmith1985]

Every boss is going to leave the person in charge, who seems like they're best at BEING 'in charge'. That person might not work hard, they may be a little more popular than hard working... but they ARE the person who people are willing to LET 'be in charge'. The person who is able to manage the overall situation. Delegate and direct all the other employees. The big picture stuff. There is always someone who is 'the natural' choice for that role in an emergency. In any workplace.

The boss is going to leave the flirty bimbo in charge if people seem to be ok with her TAKING charge beyond her job description. You are more likely to be someone who can be directed, (and will do a phenomenal job at whatever you're asked to do). Your skills are going to be super valueable. For the hard work you're sure to do well. But nothing suggests that you would be the best person to "be in charge" of the whole store in the absense of the big bosses. You working hard doesn't translate to the ability to succeed in a management role. Showing those management skills (many of them inter-personal rather than simply working hard) before you have any official right to... AND PEOPLE ACCEPTING THAT eventhough you don't have any official management title is going to be chosen every time.

[Asker]

Ok i think you explained it better this time. I get what you are saying. I guess i just have a feeling like I could be a good leader at work. I think to be a good leader you also have to serve others including subordinates. Its not about charming everyone and making yourself look hot to others by hitting on them and being bossy even if they do accept it from you. Thats just childs play. I see that girl as, yes skilled in taking on extra tasks, but a little ignorant girl child. I have seen her character and she is just so immature. Character matters in life. Its not just a little section of life and work and everything else has nothing to do with it.

Thats why people who sexually harass others even if they are amazing workers or people listen to them... Should not be rewarded. Psychopaths get people listening to them. So what? They still are extremely selfish individuals who are there to make themselves look good and use underhanded techniques to get what THEY WANT in every situation at everyone's expense. They aren't there to do work genuinely. Its about rising over others. Power.

I have leadership qualities. And they may be quiet qualities. But they are valuable because they come from a genuine place... at least far more genuine than that of a loud mouth gossipping slut (she calls herself a slut).

[SteveSmith1985]

I'm glad I explained what I meant more clearly. 🙂

I have no doubt you WOULD be a great leader at work. That's the whole reason I replied to this in the first place. I just think that the "stay in your lane" mentality will lead to you being overlooked. People willing to "break-out of their lane" and take on more management-type roles are going to outshine you EVENTHOUGH they may lack character.

So I agree that character is important. But it's a matter of "what character makes someone a good manager". Unfortunately the reality is, that it is not NECESSARILY someone with a good character who has a "good character to be a manager". THAT is why so many people work for bosses they think are idiots or assholes.

The people who succeed in the system. Whether you're talking about retail middle-management or CEOs of big companies. A good character is by no means a pre-requisite for success. The two are NOT linked in the way you might want them to be in an ideal world. There are a disproportionately high number of psychopathic personalities among CEOs. (google it!) That's no coincidence.

I think you WOULD be a great leader because your skills are valuable. You just were going about it with the wrong way of looking at it.