Is it bad to always tell your boyfriend about family problems and how you feel and cry?

[pink_and_inlove]

Besides my boyfriend I don’t really have any friends he’s my only love and friend for me and I don’t really have a lot of people that I could speak to. I always tell him about my mom and how awful she treats me and yesterday she called him claiming that I didn’t tell her that I was going out to go grocery shopping but I did she just didn’t hear me and I was upset and said that she’s always looking for problems and my parents sat down and talked with him about this even though I have asked my dad the day before and I just started crying because I’m tired of getting in trouble for everything and I was upset because I kept telling her that I told her that I was going to the grocery store which I did but she kept saying that I didn’t and seeemed to be looking for problems every week and every day there’s something today she was arguing with me about how I was in my room with him (with the door open doing his makeup I didn’t tell him about this ) and about when I asked if he could sleep that was a problem for her too she’s always arguing and she told me “you just want to fuck” and this made me feel sad and upset because I just wanted to be able to do what other couples do and I just wanted to do it because I thought it was cute. He also has an ex with family problems too but she actually ran away and didn’t get along with both of them I just struggle getting along with my mom I don’t want to remind him of that ex though.

Updates

+1 y

She started this argument right before a job interview too

Updates

+1 y

I can’t even lie down on the couch with him because that’s disrespectful, he can’t be in my room, he can’t sleep over etc., if my mom doesn’t know about where I’m going I can’t go and everything is a problem

[JHwong]

It shouldn't be bad at all! You are there for him and he is there for you. I have cried about my personal and even academic stress to my boyfriend more than I'd like to admit honestly and it is super normal because he is your man and he is there to emotionally support you just like you are his support too. There is a big difference between being toxic and being a strict parent, and I'm sorry but your mother sounds toxic. To make such a big deal out of something so small is SO unnecessary. Is she going through anything in her life that she is acting like that towards you? This is not normal for someone to do honestly. Again I'm very sorry 🙏 but calling your boyfriend to complain about something this small was very childish of her.

[Berethor]

Well if he is both your only love and your only friend it's okay. Does having sex with your boyfriend relieve some of the stress from arguing with your mom? your mom knows that you got pills and that you plan to have sex with your boyfriend, but maybe she didn't know that you already lost your virginity to him, even without the pills. I think that you should confess to your mom that you had sex with your boyfriend, maybe then she would stop arguing with you about that issue, though she going to continue arguing with you about other issues.

[pink_and_inlove]

That is a horrible idea. My mom is very hot tempered and will ban me from going to her house I also don’t really trust her that much

[Berethor]

You really think that your mom would do that? and can't you go live in your boyfriend house?

[pink_and_inlove]

I think that’s what his ex tried to do. He already has too many problems and there are already 5 people in that house

[Berethor]

How long you known about that story? and yea look like that situation might happen again.

tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/HistoryRepeats

[pink_and_inlove]

Im trying to work and get my own apartment in the future

[pink_and_inlove]

I dont want to be a burden to him so im trying to get a job

[Berethor]

Looks like you don't have much choice at this point, I actually feel bad for his ex, that he left her in such situation, yea your boyfriend don't like being with girl that become too much of a burden, it's not very chivalrous of him but that's how it is, you already know to not expect a rescue romance from him.

tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/RescueRomance

[Jjpayne]

It depends on how consistant it is...

There is nothing wrong with using your boyfriend as a shoulder to cry on.

But a relationship is give and take. You might need to find a permanent solution for your family matters. Rather than this back and forth.

Overtime it can wear on a person.

You both want to share with each other.

Overall, it's not a bad thing to cry on his shoulder. I'd say to just not aim to have it happen frequently.

Hopefully that makes sense...

[Jjpayne]

Thank you for the MHO! :)

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

Well, your Mom is a very toxic person and if she really loves you she should be treating you better and I believe you do more then your best to make this work and I don't see your Mom getting any better and she could be jealous cause your dad doesn't show her the attention she's seeking and I hate to say this your Mom could throw you in a heart attack or severe mental illness or try to poison you to get rid of you well my suggestion this sounds so bizarre but when she starts arguments get on the phone call 911 and have them solve the matters and tell them your scared your mother might harm you one time I've heard an argument with you and your Mom speaking in a different language she sounds very angry and toxic horrible person I'm sorry If I'm offending you but you deserve a better life with your boyfriend :) Hugs

[DreamCatchcer]

I think your mother is being over protective. Even though you are 19.

She's probably afraid that you might get pregnant.

Your father sounds more understanding. Maybe take some time to talk to him alone.

[pink_and_inlove]

I’m on birth control

[DreamCatchcer]

Is the guy good to you?

Your mother sounds screwed in the head. Who tells their daughter "you just want to get fucked".

[pink_and_inlove]

He is a very good guy. She probably said that because I told her a while back to please let me get some birth control pills

[pink_and_inlove]

I always protect myself with sex and use condoms

[DexWest]

As your partner, his job is to be the shoulder you cry on, the one to comfort you when you need it, and the one to put a boot up your ass even it’s needed. That’s his job. If he doesn’t like it, he should be with someone

[pink_and_inlove]

Yesterday when I cried he told me many times taht it’s okay and he held my hand/ gave me a hug. I just worry because I don’t want to remind him of his ex and my mom says that he will treat me differently if I tell him about my family problems

[pink_and_inlove]

He left his ex because of family problems that he was being blamed for

[Berethor]

His ex really sounds similar to you, but maybe it's the kind of girls that he is attracted to. :)

tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/HasAType

[pink_and_inlove]

@Berethor she wasn’t I’m the first shy girl that he’s dated

[Berethor]

@pink_and_inlove so you hope that he has more protective feelings for you because of that?

tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/TheIngenue

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

Once or twice is ok, but cut it out after that. Nobody wants constant drama and problems thrown at them.

[pink_and_inlove]

I agree I think I’ll just keep writing on here

[Sevenpointfive]

you're still a baby and you shouldn't be doing things that could lead to a baby. it's time for you to grow up (meaning get a job, a car and out of her hair)

[pink_and_inlove]

I’m actually trying really hard to get a job right now just had an interview today

[Sevenpointfive]

i know. i'm very proud of you for that

[pink_and_inlove]

Had to decline though because it wasn’t convenient to me but I’m going to another interview tomorrow

[Sevenpointfive]

don't give up. there's nothing like earning your own money to change things. unfortunately mothers like her will charge you rent now

[pink_and_inlove]

I won’t give up and I don’t think she’ll charge me rent lol

[Sevenpointfive]

mark my words jay! she's gonna have to control something now that you will soon be making money. don't hide your money in the house. i've dealt with people like your mother

[888theGreat]

You would like to have sex with him , right? So, they are being protective. Remember, they have been there , probably did that. You see?

Solutions:
Get married
Move out on your own

[andy530]

Nope that’s called getting emotional support it is generally assumed that is something you can seek from a partner

[COMMODOREII]

Who can you talk to if you can't talk to your boyfriend or girlfriend? 😄

[knight2468]

I don’t remember one girl in my life don’t talk about her family problems so don’t worry it’s a common thing

[Anonymous]

I wonder how ugly you look even without makeup because even with it you ain’t all that

[pink_and_inlove]

Wow you stalk my question just to say that what low life

[Snowman666]

If your putting out, he can put up with it.

[Gwenhwyfar]

Not bad at all