He's always angry. Granted I get into grumpy moods but then he won't forgive me when I try to make up. I can't say I'm sorry, I can't try to make it up, I can't do anything because he'll shame me for even trying. He's dealing with a low form of cancer right now and he's retiring. He's always been an incredibly stressful person and thinks of himself as if he's relaxed when he isn't. What he likes is working. He thinks that money is the answer to everything. Granted, he gives me everything: money, a nice house, school, everything. His dad did the same with him. I mean it's nice, but I never feel a sense of independence. He doesn't want me to work on my own because he thinks that part times are for losers. I had a part time for a month and he shamed me out of it. All I want is a dad. All I want is to be able to hang out with my dad. But all he wants is praise that he gives me everything. And I don't want that to sound like I'm ungrateful, I am. It's just I'm spoiled by my dad but he doesn't seem to want a relationship out of me praising him for that and I don't know why. I want to help people, and support myself, and follow my dreams, but I'm stuck in this "daddys girl" role because I'm his only kid. My mom just lets him yell at me. I struggle grately with my mental health but when I talk about anything inferior to his liking in this respect, it's like I'm nothing to him. I always have emotional problems with people because I can never actually express myself to anyone. If I talk about something I'm anxious about, I'm desperate for attention to him. If I cry I'm a bad person to him. All I want is a hug and an "everything's gonna be alright," that's all. He talks about how he's gonna die one day all of the time and how he wishes we spent more time together but won't take the opportunity to actually try to have a relationship with me. He shits on everyone for everything and I can't argue with it, I just have to sit there and be positive all of the time.
How do I improve my relationship with my dad?
