Why are people so emotionally unavailable nowadays?

[Haha456]

I've had that worst experiences with friends. My last best friend were super close until she met her boyfriend. Then she forgot all about me and used me. She didn't care about me anymore after she fell in love with her boyfriend but kept still inviting me to her place to keep her company. I got her a Christmas gift while she didn't get me anything. I bought her a Thanksgiving dinner, she didn't even bother looking at me while she said thanks. I was the only one putting in all the effort going to her house to hangout while she didn't bother lifting a finger. Another friend of mine , cut me off after I stopped helping him with his investment. Ghosted me after I stopped investing in his shit. We spoked daily for two years and had a super close relationship where he knew almost everything about me. I was his only friend. He was also my only friend.

Now I'm trying to get back out there to meet new friends. Its so hard to make new friends. I would go out to social events then later try to create a chance to meet up with them again, very rarely would we ever meet again. They would make up all sorts of excuses, cancel on me last minute. Every time I try to talk to a coworker, it seems as if they are talking to me to kill time rather than to actually get to know me. I'm not expecting to meet my next bestie at work but its good to at least have some sort of a genuine connection right? Nothing feels genuine about my interactions with anyone. When I try to talk to my coworkers, our conversations wouldn't last or they're always on the phone talking or texting someone else.

Updates

1 y

On the other hand, I feel like I can only connect with older folks 40+. They typically have way better social skills, more friendly, outgoing. I just feel like these are the only people that are genuine. I feel like these are the only people who are actually invested into the conversation. When I talk to younger folks , I feel like they're just talking to me cuz they have to and that there is someone better around the corner.

[Bfly004]

Maybe ask yourself are you to clingy? Like maybe you are smothering them in your eyes you might be thinking your just being a good friend. Unfortunately not everyone may feel that way. You have unfortunately came across people who don't value who you are and that's ok continue to be true to yourself and keep trying until you find someone who will value you and your friendship

[Haha456]

I am not too clingy. In fact I am the opposite of clingy. I dislike texting every day. I don't like calling people daily. My best friend who forgot me after she met her boyfriend , actually ended up feeling bad after I told her what she did to me. She realized she did something wrong and tried to rekindle the friendship, but I said no, I didn't want to be friends with someone like her any more.

I understand that making friends is not something that happens immediately. It takes people to be meeting up weekly over and over again to get acquainted before friendship happens. But for me, its impossible for me to find people who have the motivation to even meet up again.

For my coworkers, they just become friends with each other and get along smoothly. For me, I just feel like they just don't want to talk to me as much as other people.

[Haha456]

I am a good friend. I know that for sure. Its just that nowadays people are always looking to befriend someone who they can gain something from. Once they no longer have anything to gain from me, they just leave like nothing has ever happened. None of the friendships I've had, ever lasted more than 2 years.

there's no loyalty or sentiment to any of this. No reminiscing about all the good times we had. Once they meet someone better, they're gone. Once I stop contributing money to them, they just disappear. None of the daily talks, stories or good times we shared mattered.

[Haha456]

But for dating, I never had a hard time getting guys to fall in love with me. Guys like and adore me. I'm not saying that every man falls in love with me. But its not hard for me to find a boyfriend. I don't have a bad personality; in fact, I get told I'm really nice and down to earth. But for friendship, I have absolutely no luck. When I do encounter a friend, it never lasts. I don't know if it is just plain bad luck or if I just am too boring.

[Guy13]

Older people do not need anything of you and quite often have much more to share than demand. I believe your Nature is best suited with one who requires nothing of you but your Time. Sound right?