My fiancée's family is saying really horrible stuff about me but am not aloud to confront them as my fiancée says they are sensitive?

[Saraxox]

They constantly question our relationship especially his sister, but should I be able to confront them about the things they have said as some of the things said has really affected my mental health and my self esteem?

Updates

+1 y

I've basically been told by my fiancée that he is stuck in the middle and wants a relationship with his family and doesn't want to pick between us, even though he has told me a lot of the things his family have said about me, needs proper opinions from both guys and gals here!

[Anonymous]

It's not your fault and you're not alone in this situation. ﾠ

[BοοbSlayer]

Oh, dear Saraxox, it sounds like you're in quite a difficult situation. Dealing with negative comments and criticisms from your fiancée's family can be incredibly hurtful and challenging to navigate. It's understandable that you might be feeling upset, frustrated, and even questioning your self-worth. But fear not, for I am here to offer you some support and guidance as your super supportive and uplifting assistant!

First and foremost, it's essential to prioritize your mental health and well-being above all else. Negative comments from others can have a significant impact on our self-esteem and overall happiness. It's crucial to recognize that you have the right to set boundaries and protect yourself from toxic behavior, even if it comes from your fiancée's family.

However, in situations like this, it can be tricky to find the balance between expressing your feelings and respecting your fiancée's wishes. It's understandable that he might be caught in the middle, torn between his family and the person he loves. Open and honest communication is key here. Sit down with your fiancée and have a heartfelt conversation about how their family's negative comments have been affecting you emotionally. Sharing your thoughts and concerns can help him understand the impact it's having on your mental health.

While it's important to express your feelings, it's also important to approach the situation with empathy and understanding. Remember that your fiancée might have his own complex emotions and loyalties towards his family. By having an open dialogue, you can work together as a team to find a solution that respects both your feelings and his desire for a relationship with his family.

In the meantime, my friend, it's crucial to surround yourself with a support system that uplifts and encourages you. Lean on your own family and friends who can offer love, understanding, and a listening ear. Engaging in activities that bring you joy, practicing self-care, and seeking professional help, such as therapy or counseling, can also be immensely beneficial for your mental well-being during this challenging time.

Now, let's address the elephant in the room - confronting your fiancée's family. While it may be tempting to confront them head-on and defend yourself against their hurtful comments, it's important to consider the potential consequences and impact it may have on your relationship. Remember, my friend, that confrontation doesn't always lead to resolution or understanding. In sensitive situations like this, it's often more effective to focus on building bridges and fostering open communication rather than engaging in confrontations that may further strain relationships.

Instead, consider taking a more diplomatic approach. Perhaps you could suggest a family meeting or a calm discussion where you can express your feelings in a non-confrontational manner. Share your experiences, concerns, and the impact their words have had on you. By approaching the situation with honesty, vulnerability, and a desire for understanding, you may be able to bridge the gap and foster a more positive relationship with your fiancée's family. ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ

Ultimately, my friend, the decision of whether or not to confront your fiancée's family is yours to make. Trust your instincts and do what feels right for you. Remember that your mental health and well-being should always be a priority. If engaging with his family is causing you more harm than good, it may be necessary to establish boundaries and limit your interactions with them for the sake of your own emotional well-being. ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ ﾠ

It's important to remember that you are a strong, resilient individual who deserves to be treated with love, respect, and kindness. Surround yourself with people who uplift and support you, and remember that their negative comments do not define you.

[YesterdaysChild]

I don't think things will ever change and it will affect the relationship with your Fiance. sooner or later unless they do. Your choices are: A - have it out with them and set the record straight. B - tell them to shut the fuck up! C - If your fiance won't back you, then he never will with anything else either. He will either wind up estranged from them, or you. I would have to say, sadly, to call it quits. It's not worth your happiness or having mental health issues over it. You would be better off playing in traffic.

[Anonymous]

thank god this dude is only a fiance. you may want to rethink marrying him. and i'm not saying this just to say this or saying this lightly. he will never defend you. and you want to marry into this family who says this about you? i'm assuming he's also really close with his family. nah. this will be the event that will tear you two apart. whether it be now or 10 years from now. it is clear where he stands and he doesn't care about your feelings or what others say about you.

[Oliverlogan263]

Damn, that's fucked up situation. Your fiancée's family is way outta line talking shit about you like that. And it ain't cool how it's affecting your mental health either.

The way I see it, you gotta stand up for yourself here somehow. If you're not allowed to talk to them direct, you gotta get your fiancée to have a serious convo letting them know their disrespect won't fly anymore. They shouldn't be making you feel like crap in your own relationship.

Your girl needs to put her foot down that they need to get on board or cut it out for good. Family or not, no one should get away with treating you like that.

I'd also let your girl know how it's really messing with your head and you need her full support in dealing with it. Not just telling you to ignore it. That ain't fair to expect.

If she won't handle it, then you do what you gotta do for your own self-respect. Even if it means clapping back at them or cutting contact yourself if they keep up the BS.

Cause in the end, she chose you. So they gotta learn to accept it or stay mad... but they don't get to sabotage your mental health over it. Stay strong bro, you got this!

[normalice]

There's always a delicate way to phrase something. But I'd say just bored disdain is the best option. Bring your phone or whatever and watch Netflix ith headphones while they talk, and ignore them. It is on your fiance if he doesn't let you defend yourself,

[normalice]

I think if you approach it how you would if they were your siblings and you would still have a relationship with them, and they with you, no matter what, it'd be easier to come up with ways to approach the problem. Your judgements of each other mean nothing in the grand scheme of things. Take their rotten mouth as a symptom of a rotten brain. There's nothing you can do about it and that it's directed at you isn't personal. Pity them with the understanding that it isn't your job to guard them from consequences and you won't have to visit them often. They'll get bored once they see you aren't interested in letting it be your problem.

[Saraxox]

Oh gosh that would be held against me as being rude as they seem to always try and find faults with me at any moment to prove to my fiancée that am not right for him

[Saraxox]

They are very negative, bitter people that seem to be unhappy in their own lives and want everyone around them to feel the same, that's why I hate being round them, they just bring you down

[normalice]

It seems like they are going to do that anyway so you may as well focus on how to minimize its effect on you.

[jshm2]

No need for you to do anything. But do you really want to marry into such a family?

[Saraxox]

Am having my doubts as if I can't let myself be defended like my parents taught me or the man that is suppose to love me can't grow a pair and stand up to his family when he knows that they are in the wrong not me, then am not sure

[jahaims]

He isn't the right guy if he accepts that kind of disrespect. He doesn't respect you.

[Sour-rose]

Okay bet...

*confronts them anyway*

[balyai]

Break up

[gorydetails]

like what?

[Saraxox]

Things like am a gold digger, am fat, I hide things financially from him I could go on but all the things they say are based on nothing as they don't know me at all.

[gorydetails]

If your fiancé won’t stick up for you he’s not much of a man.