Was my reply good towards a negative person in the past?

[Anonymous]

Someone contacted me after 10 years of not hearing from her. We were then 14 year-olds (in 8th grade) the last time I saw her. But for whatever reason she decided to be hateful since 6th grade and had her small group of followers. I had a couple friends too.

The apology note felt as if she was in some type of 12 step program or something. Then she asked if we could meet up, along with a FB friend request. I declined it and this was my reply:

I have no hard feelings but honestly have no interest in building any type of connection with you. Friendships take time to build. You had your chance back then but chose not to be my friend. Since you weren't interest in a friendship at that moment, I don't want it now, all of the sudden just because you now feel sorry. Please don't ever contact me again. I have my own friends. You're not welcome in my present life.

Updates

1 y

She had the choice of being a normal, nice person back then and we would've had a long-time friendship by now. Instead she acted like a hateful, jerk, bully and so lost her chance of being in my life, in getting to know me better.

[Danielle93]

Not really. If someone has been a bully in the past, then they don't get to decide anymore how the person they bullied will react nor if a friendship will even be welcome. Not everything in life is magically solved with an apology where all if forgive and forgotten and you welcome them with open arms. That's Hollywood movie endings.

[SteveSmith1985]

Well I'm inclined to think this wasn't the best way to go. But then again I'm extremely biased.

Maladroit Mid-Life-Musings: Bullying, Bystanders and Regret (25 years later)

-that being said, you are entitled to feel however you feel. Every situation is different.

🙂

[Anonymous]

Seems a little harsh, but it is your call.