The "little sister" type never gets the guy?

Question

Well I'm 18 and apparently if you look at my face you would think I'm 14. (I don't like to wear make up, so I don't)

I look a lot younger also because I'm 5'1 and I pretty much have a flat chest. I'm shy,(although confident), humble, honest and really friendly with strangers who also seem shy, I try to help them out a bit. I've been told that when I talk it seems like I'm my age if not older.

I'm always overlooked when it comes to guys and everybody thinks of me as the "little sister that need protecting" type, even my new and old friends. The people I like never like me in that way, so I've never had a boyfriend.

Is it because I look so young that boys my age won't date me?

Folklore · Accepted Answer

I feel that the way you describe yourself seems very attractive. You sound like you have a positive attitude and you know who you are. Some people have left advice saying that you should try to put on a little make up to make yourself look a little older. Others have said that you needn't worry about it and that you should simply wait for the right guy. Well, putting on make up will probably work. Wearing make up might catch men's eyes more often but by wearing make up you may have to be more careful as you might get unwanted attention. And as far as waiting goes, that could work but it could take longer than you want it to. I mean, wait it out and you're bound to meet the right guy, but when? But from what I gather, you don't seem to be big on the make up thing and you probably don't want to wait for Mr. Right.

Now since you seem to have an idea of who you are and you talk comfortably about yourself in a positive way, I think you should try to work harder with what you've got.

"I'm 5'1 and I pretty much have a flat chest. I'm shy,(although confident), humble, honest and really friendly"

Although you're 5'1 I feel that would not be a problem for men since a lot (not all)of men find really tall women too much. From numerous studies, it's been concluded that majority of men tend to find women that are shorter than themselves more attractive than women that are taller.

Breast size also does not matter. Sure there are plenty of men who enjoy larger breasts but there are just as many who prefer them smaller. Either way this does not matter because that argument is more for sexual attraction and sex itself. So the traditional A cups or D cups argument is irrelevant (in my humble opinion) on the subject of dating.

Being shy, humble, honest and friendly is (again in my opinion) one of the most attractive set of personality traits a woman can have. So since you have an attractive personality there's one topic left on attracting men. Weight. Now since you're 5'1 with breasts on the smaller size, I assume that a healthy and attractive weight you should be ranges between 100 and 135 depending on muscle tone and amount of body fat. Assuming that you are healthy and happily within this range, here's what I advise:

Be a bit more flirtatious. You said you are comfortable with yourself so show it. It's cute for a girl to be shy but being too shy can be simply annoying. Try asking new guys you meet (or guys that you've known for a while) out on dates. From what you've described, it sounds as though you're more likely attracting shy guys instead of more forward guys. So if that's the case which I believe it to be (I could be wrong) then I think you should try breaking the shy guys out of their shell. You might be surprised at who will say yes if you were to ask them out.

Anyways I hope this helped out somewhat. Whichever you decide between make up, waiting, or being more forward with men, I hope it works out for you.

bobair · Accepted Answer

At 18 all guys want are the girls other guys will be jealousy of - thin chicks with big t*ts. At 25 guys start to mature and shift to women with personalities, humor, love, passion, etc. So things may seem sh*tty now but when you hit 25 you'll be the girl all the guys are dying to meet.

I really think you sound pretty awesome so I doubt it's how you look. The best thing you can do is meet the types of guys you'd want to date. I think your problem is that you're still hanging out with dudes your own age who are too immature to see past your superficial appearance.

Take the next few years to meet as many nice guys as possible while focusing on your future - school, career, friends and family.

The right guy will show up if you create the space for him to show up.

Be social. As much as possible. This doesn't mean going out to get drunk at the clubs because that's the wrong space.

Stay young, stay cute, and stay awesome!

~ Robby

My Blog ( link )

sosara21 · Accepted Answer

i have the exact same problem except I'm 5'2 and don't have a flat chest (but my face looks really young  because I don't wear make up and it just has this little girl look to it) but I'm actually really mature and act just like my friends who are the same age and older. For me I only had one real boyfriend and he kinda looked at me as the "needs protecting" type but after he got to know me he started to like me and we went out. the point of this is basically most guys will be like that towards you but the few guys that look passed the exterior are usually worth the wait. so yeah to some guys its a bit of a turn off because you look young (therefore really innocent but not in the sexy way more like in the cute way) so they end up just not being able to look at you like that but when the right guy comes you'll be perfect for each other :)...on a side note I noticed most guys that like me are at least 5'10- 6'2 lol but ya lol I don't know bout you but that's how it is for me XD well I hope I helped :)

blazyblazerson2 · Accepted Answer

Hmm I know what you mean. I'm 17 going on 18 and some say I look 14 or 15. But others say I look my age. I have an older brother 26 to be exact and he is 6 4 lol I'm only 5 3 so yeah big difference there. I got looked at and even known as the little sister cause my brother was a hot shot musician and surfer. My guy friends think I'm cute in that way like you said and want to protect me but then they shift and act totally different. I do wear make up though. Not too much though. Plus I make sure what I wear is age appropriate but then again I live in a beach city so it's bikinis short shorts and tanks and flip flops like reefs lol but I don't know I changed their looks on me somehow but I'm not sure how and now most of my friends are in college and I've only dated college guys. But I do work at it. I've gained back my 6pack, smile a lot, be confident, I just became care free and I don't know exactly but it changed even though I didn't really change I don't think

littlegirl · Accepted Answer

You will be thankful for your youthful looks when you are older! I'm 39 and to some people I look like I'm in my late 20's to early 30's (and I even wear makeup). I even took a pic recently and I looked 14! (I had my hair in pigtails) LoL...I'm 5'2", thin and small chested and I get picked up on all the time lately (divorced a year). A friend says it's because of my virginal face (LoL). I think it's because I'm little and guys think it's "cute".

Maybe put on mascara, open your eyes up a little if you don't want to put on a lot of make up...but in the end it's going to be about your personality. I just think you haven't found the right guy. You have your youth in your favor - there is no hurry! Good luck!

thompson75 · Answer

You should wear make up every once in a while and "Va Va Voom" it up. Your friends, though I'm sure they love you, probably don't need you taking attention away from them by bringing yourself into "the game" (not maliciously, it's just pretty natural).

I'm glad you asked this question, because I know a girl that is EXXXAAACCCTTTLLYY as you describe yourself, except she's 22. When I first met her, I liked her, and she seemed to like me... but after a month or so.. I'm just like totally protective of her, and I do treat her like a little sister. (I must say "awwww" at least 3 times every time I see her)

I think if you, every once in a while, put on some make up, deck yourself out, you can remind folks that you are, indeed, a big girl. Cheers!

somedude555 · Answer

its likely that guys just overlook you because like you said, you don't wear makeup and appear young.

i don't want to encourage you to do something you don't want to, but it sounds like you might want to do just a little bit of the "makeup thing" and possibly get some clothes that more appropriately show your age(im just guessing that you dress young as well, which might not be the case).

now I'm NOT saying to pile on makeup and dress like a hooker to get mens attention, because that's not the kind of attention you want. I'm just saying maybe just a liittle bit of eyeliner or something like that and an outfit that shows off (not flaunts) your feminine attributes in a flattering manner.

Riksounds · Answer

I sympathize! I was the nice guy! I used to get, "Your so cute! Your just like a brother! I hated that! I watched all the "Bad Boys" get the girls, use them, dump them and then the girls looked for other "Bad Boys" who did it again! It wasn't until I was out of college that I met a gorgeous woman who had enough of that crap and wanted a nice guy with brass balls like I had! the reason is, I can be a nice guy that won't put up with "Bad Boys" attitudes and I have given a taste of that to quite a few "Bad Boys" over the years!

Anonymous · Answer

I feel the same way when it comes to looking younger than what I am, and seeing how most girls (not all) won't bother dating a guy who is younger than them I get younger girls who don't know me, to be not interested in me because of how old I look. When they get to know me they thought of me as a younger brother, and even though they now know old I really am now, since they had that first impression that I was younger it sticks to them that I am like a "brother" to them.There's been a few that say they would have dated me if they knew right off the bat what my age is. I'm 19 and I seriously look like I am 15 when I shave my face. And seeing how I don't like having facial hair, that is quite often.

ginamarie391 · Answer

I use to have the same exact problem. I grew up with 4 older brothers and my best friend is a guy and has been my best friend for 19yrs. So I was also use to guys protection because that's all I was ever around growing up. I finally had to tell myself that the next guy I meet, I will make him casual and see if He shows interest in me. I was always famous for putting myself out there first and becoming His friend. I finally decided to let him become mine and see if he really was willing to make an effort for me. That's how I found out that there are guys out there that will like you and eventually love you

TimeAndTimeAgain · Answer

Naw it's got nothing to do with that. It just means you haven't found the right person yet.

Keep trying to talk to the people you like, and eventually you'll find someone who will also like you back. =p The "little sister" thing is more to do with how you act, than the way you look.

Anonymous · Answer

Put makeup on for a sexier and more attractive look. You're probably cute but don't inspire any sexual attraction or desire from a guy. Wearing makeup and changing your clothes won't make you a poser, it will give you a more attractive look that guys respond to. Your friends probably tell you not to change your look so you won't be hot or any real competition to them. Sometimes women can be catty like that.

Jon364 · Answer

When I think of little sister types, I think of attention seeking, and for me that's a turn off. There is a point when it's cute, and there's another point where it's "enough already".

You didn't mention that though. You mentioned "little sister that needs protecting". It's hard to say. You don't sound bad at all.. nothing really sticks out. Maybe it's the "seem young" thing, but it's hard to say.

confused4now · Answer

A short young LEGAL girl who looks even younger...Most guys find that... to use a girly word, HOT!  Oh, grow up!  Before the progressives took over kids use to get married at 14 instead of like... 30! Rush Limbaugh just married a hot girl in her 30s.  You may have the opposite problem.  A lot of guys might look at you and think you're so sexy you must already have a boyfriend.  Quit your whining and GO GET ONE!

AkilJoseph · Answer

Personally I've been the even as a guy.Wanting the girls that everyone else had the sexy hot type,because I was looking younger  girls never paid attention to me.See I know something now,things are never the way they appear and that mislead a lot of people.Personally all I can tell you just do what you wanna do,what ever makes you look older and more attractive.just play it cool and they guys will want you.

Anonymous · Answer

Not to sound like a perv/pedophile but cutesy, innocent looking girls are a HUGE turn of for me. I actually prefer woman who are petite and little smaller up top.

I'm 28 and I often date younger women (but never ever anybody under 18). As long as I'm being respectful I feel like it should be that big of a deal.

TastyPie · Answer

First of all, be yourself. Stop worrying about what you perceive to be happening. The right guy will come along, there is plenty of time. None of us can give you the answer you are looking for without seeing you and getting to know you first. Keep your chin up!

jacquesvol · Answer

When I was 16, the sister of my best (guy) friend) was 13-14, looking like 11-12.

Nice kid, very interested in me, we met and talked, I liked her but I was happy when one of my friends fell in love with her. Happy for her and happy for me (because that gave me a clear conscience) the idea of dating/ being seen dating someone that young made me uneasy.

Nothing to do with her cup size or so, the girl I really liked wasn't very wel endowed either.

Lockjawx27 · Answer

why would a guy even risk it? If you get charged with sex with a minor, your in prison and ur pic and adress are online forever on the sexregistry site

Men all over are scared to do many things because of the anti-male laws out there...we are scared to talk to women at work, because if she cries sexual harrassment, its over for us and we have no say.

same with this. no point in risking ridicule and inprisonment with a girl that looks like a lolita

Mel549 · Answer

My best friend is just like you! Honestly, when something is meant to happen, it will. Be confident, flirt it up, be yourself. I swear, you'll find someone when the timing is right because even little sister-types can find a romantic involvement :]

Meetmeonthequinox · Answer

Thats weird...I know a lot of guys that are really into the "little sister" type, for me its not really like that's the only kinda girl I want..but I do find it attractive. I'm kinda baffled.

katrinasanchez · Answer

Yeah I think that's it.  Even if a guy was my age but looked 4 years younger, I wouldn't go out with him.  It willl just feel like I'm dating a kid.

PlumPudding · Answer

Dude, you are pretty much describing me! :O I am EXACTLY the same way, 5'1", flat-chested, and shy.   And yes, I'm overlooked by guys most of the time. . .

pezzonovante88 · Answer

You sound like my female counterpart!  I would love to give some advice but, you sound pretty attractive to me ;)

EddyMetal · Answer

Based on your profile picture you already know. If you go to Japan the guys will be all over a loli like you.

SeriousBlack · Answer

I honestly like your type, you sound like a girl I would like to date. To answer your question I would assume that your appearance is part of the reason, not the whole reason but part of it.

dreamishobby · Answer

damn...just have patience wait 4 some time... you will start getting matured naturally and will get someone...dont be so bothered at the moment...u are just 18...

Anonymous · Answer

You'd get me. You sound like a vision and with no make-up, major kudos for that.

I have the same sort of problem with looking younger, but added to that is the fact that I also act like I'm 14 sometimes, so girls lose their patience with me occaisionally, hehe. So girls older don't bother with me and younger girls love me, but I'm forbidden to love them, haha. It's a terrible tragedy.

smallbrownman · Answer

Yeah you have to exude a F me kinda sexy and guys will be all over you... And if you do it wrong, you'll just make a complete fool of yourself so do it right!

cjwright79 · Answer

Short answer: yes. Long, convoluted answer: uh huh.

Anonymous · Answer

Lots of people think of the little sister as the cute one, like girl next door type. Haha I get a lot more guys that my older sister.

sazzy18 · Answer

ive been experiencing this all my life with 3 older brothers, all 6ft+ and play rugby :( every guy is always to scared to make a move.

iXenomorph · Answer

Damn it where ya been all my life?

wellshii · Answer

judging from your pic ,u look youunger than 14

chiefnavarro · Answer

damn. I be after that real fast. on the quickness

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Why does my friend who calls me her “sister” told me I’ll never find a good guy?

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Why does my friend who calls me her “sister” told me I’ll never find a good guy?

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