Guys what kind of pressures do you face from society?

Question

We women and girls are expected to have big boobs, flat stomach, big butts (unrealistic hourglass body is the new trend) and to be skinny but that’s not possible unless she has plastic surgery to achieve those looks since skinny women don’t have enough fats in their boobs and ass. We are also expected to be body hair free (more in the West but not so much in Asia), have a cyborgian face (which can be achieve by plastic surgery you can Google it if you want to know what that face is supposed to look), no imperfections, have an attractive face. I think that’s all the pressures we girls and women have to face and deal with sadly. 😓 If we don’t have all those we are considered unattractive by society, also I had no idea who set those standards do they come from men or women or maybe both

KlinkyCoder · Accepted Answer

Maybe guys don't need to be as pressured concerned about looks-wise, but then you are just trading it in for different pressures. Men are considered the expendable sex in the social and romantic/sex area because men are expected to take the initiation and face more rejection thus they are more lonely than women, more men are homeless and are killing themselves than women, I can list even more. I don't put stock in what the mainstream news and opinions say, they only present a surface-level facade of many things that are really going on.

Ryfyle · Accepted Answer

@rosabelle65 You can tell "society" to get fucked. Seriously stop falling for the shit they put in Ads and what not.

MrOracle · Answer

Men are expected to take on responsibility, not only for ourselves, but for our dates and family. Let me explain the actual depths of this: there are virtually no "safety nets" for men. Few homeless programs target men, and many don't allow men, despite men being 90% of the homeless. There are hundreds of mental health programs and dozens of physical clinics for needy women - there was a single clinic for men, and it got shut down for daring to cater to men. If a woman moves back in with her parents or other relative, it's no big deal, but if a man does so, he's ridiculed and seen as a failure and "less of a man."

Men are expected to do all of the dangerous, deadly, life-shortening jobs. We are the ones expected to investigate noises in the night, and to stand between danger and our loved ones. "Women and children first" means that men are expected to die in order that women and kids can live. Men do the vast majority of the war-fighting, and are the vast majority of those maimed, killed, or psychologically damaged for life by war.

Men are also expected to take almost total responsibility for dating and the overwhelming responsibility in relationships. Men have to approach women and face rejection. Men have to pay for dates - and this isn't just for your meal or movie ticket, but men also are expected to have their own place, and a car, etc. Women can live at home and have no car and it's fine, but men must have a car and a place before he can date in most cases. Men are looked to to pay most of the bills, and just about always, are expected to loan the woman money if she gets into financial trouble - yet it's incredibly rare that women would do the same, and even more rare that her loaning him money wouldn't destroy all respect she had for him.

Men are not expected to show their emotions in public, unless they are "happy" or "angry" - just about anything else is supposed to be suppressed. Many women are quite vocal about losing all attraction for a man who shows any kind of weakness, and society in general expects men to "man up" or "walk it off" or "deal with it." Most men have no one to talk to if they have a problem, because no one cares if we have a problem. We're expected to solve it ourselves - and we're also expected to solve most problems that women have as well.

Just to be clear, I'm not denying that women have pressures of their own, and I'm not really complaining about the pressures that men face. I long ago figured out how to deal with these things, and I manage to handle things on my own. But many men really struggle, and no one cares when they do. In fact, if groups of men want to get together to support each other, or a group starts a support system to take care of men, other people actively work to shut it down - attacking sponsors and donors and those who need services. It's happened many times.

JSmuve · Answer

We face similar body image issues. We have to be a certain height to be considered desirable, certain facial aesthetics, muscular, large penis. We have to be able to maintain an erection, which isn't always possible and know our way around a woman's body and how to fuck even if we have little experience.

We have to have a lot of different skills inside and outside the bedroom, even if no one is around to teach us, which means we're either always have to be learning new skills or it's our fault if we can't do something that we're "supposed" to know. The burden of performance rests heavy on our shoulders.

Everything is our fault and we have to be responsible for a lot of things, even if we don't know what we're doing. If the relationship fails, it's our fault. If she cheats, it's our fault. If we lose our job, it's our fault. If the sex is bad, it's our fault. If we can't provide, it's our fault. If something bad happens, it's our fault and our responsibility to deal with it.

We're expected to be good with women; funny, charismatic, and know how to win one over and bed one when we have to. Those that don't are labelled 'incels'. We're expected to do the approaching and deal with all the rejection, which some women aren't very nice about, even if our personalities try to keep us to ourselves. We have to make all of the moves, organize and pay for all of the dates, which can be really taxing to come up with new and exciting ideas as well as taxing on the wallet.

We have to be stoic and suppress any negative emotions we might have. The only two emotions that are socially acceptable for us are anger and happiness. We're not privileged to the same emotional support that women are because we're discouraged from being vulnerable.

We also feel pressure to be successful early on. Lots of women want a guy who earns at least the same as her and I read somewhere that a lot of women want a guy who earns 50% more than her. Thus, there's a pressure on us to get a high-paying job to provide, but in this day-and-age where the pay gap is shrinking and a lot of women out-earn guys, there's a certain financial standard that many guys can't live up to.

Anonymous · Answer

Around here, where I live you'd better be earning upper 50K a year, and to play with the big boys, you'd better at least pull in 110K. They will NOT let you in the door just for being cool or chill. You'd better have a name and influence and money. Creatives are losers, unless they're famous (and bring their "screw you money" back to Michigan). That's mostly people in general who seem to think that - not just women.

Women aren't interested in young guys for long term relationships unless they're earning upper 50K at least, and usually I'd estimate around 70K to be on the "ok" side.

Past that, if you're older with some influence and power, you might eke out something decent with people, and you don't have to be a model. But we are expected to look as good as we can.

The general accepted unofficial rule is that for everything that a woman would deem "unfortunate," you'd better make up for it in some "useful" way. (I've heard at least by 25% better than your local average). Being exceptionally good at art, or music... not good enough, unless it earns you good money and sounds fancy.

You can maybe get away with kinda ugly, if you have a cool or respectable sounding job and money, or you have a lot of influence and power, or you're well endowed/amazing in bed, or you're brilliant in some useful way (something that she can brag about to friends). And the more you can check off the boxes, the better you'll do statistically.

Men are expected to do just about everything financially and we should probably be pretty handy around the house - fixing things, at least. You'd better not live with anyone other than a roommate at 25 - you'd better have a high end apartment at the least by 24, screw the economy. A guy living at home, even those who pay rent, if it's to the parents, they are complete losers.

Preferably provide emotionally, without being a "sissy." We're not supposed to show much emotion. If we do, or we talk about things bothering us, then we're overly sensitive losers... and we'd better be manly, but not a super creep pig about it. Angry is ok, as long as it isn't abusive (even then... you can get away with more if you're successful, but otherwise, you ALWAYS have to keep everything in check. Talkative as a guy? Loser. Show excitement over something "nerdy" - loser. Better be the stereotypical frat type stuff (without the same level of misogyny) and anything past that... no. Just. No.

TheSpaceGnome · Answer

Women with attractive faces, naturally big, perky boobs, a slim hourglass figure, a bubble butt, and micro sized body hair that never needs a shave, actually do exist quite often with no surgery involved, as all of that (except maybe the weight) is the result of female hormones, which women usually have a lot of.

I've met a lot of women like that, and thus far I didn't like any of them short of a few cosplayers and professional gamers who would never give me the time of day, because finding attractive bodies is easy, finding attractive minds? Now thats hard, at least for me, so hard that at 35 I still can't find someone I want.

Not sure what a "cyborgian" face is. So Imma just leave that one alone.

None of these are pressures though, no one expects you or anyone else to morph into any of that. And society does not have a singular taste in sexual preferences, people actually do like different things.

My biggest pressure as a guy is time, I feel like most women can spend zero time looking for a partner and get flooded with messages on dating sites, and even good looking guys who are funny, smart, and loving, have to make finding "the one" a full time job..

ChrisMaster69 · Answer

The pressures for guys start as young kids, we must be good at sports, if not you are not really taken seriously, you must be good at woodwork / metalwork etc.
School sports day, you must come in the top 3 runners etc in each event.
get in a fight you win, get hurt then you live with it and don’t show emotion.
You don’t do fashion but you must stick to the guys dress code on colours etc.
you most be able to climb a rope, a tree, be able to swim

then as you get older, must go to gym, must have a 6 pack, must play a team sport.
must have lost virginity by 16.
We must also have good qualifications, get good degrees in blokes subjects
heaven forbid a guy wants to be a Nurse…

you get the idea, there are a lot of things expected of a guy, invariably from other guys such as their father, brothers and male friends.

we are also our own worst enemies, how many times have you seen words such as alpha and Beta thrown around, only guys really use them (US guys mainly it seems), this is another society expectation being thrust on to guys to comply with ideals set by other guys.

Never mind expectations from the other gender, our own gender is happy to kick the shit out of itself.

Diodoro · Answer

Sincerely I think we all overplay the idea of societal expectations. They do exist but a lot of what we call aren't expectations just ideals that receive a level of praise because we tend to have primal attraction to those things

You don't get an over 50% population that's overweight by having societal expectations of physical stature. If anything we lack societal expectations of what guys and girls should have

Because expectations are reinforced by those in society both overtly and implicitly. When telling a friend they're beginning to get overweight is socially considered "mean" or that really even talking about it is fat shaming oh, you basically have the opposite

The societal expectation of men and women as far as Fitness is concerned is that you'll figure it out if you want to, but if you don't you should accept yourself as you are and no one can tell you otherwise

Now that doesn't mesh well with positive life outcomes in dating. But society at large does reinforce that expectation.

ohshee · Answer

To be 100% honest with you I don't face any pressures whatsoever. I could care that's who Society wants to make me into if I have this if I don't have that if I look this way if I don't look this way I could care less I'm happy with me I know exactly who I am I know exactly what I can do and what I cannot. And the things that I cannot I will find a way to do it I don't have to look a certain way my cock is what my cock is I don't care. I've been blessed in so many different ways just unreal. And I don't need to become somebody else or try to be somebody else because of what society says I say fuck Society what's up people who are going to judge me. I don't know you but I guarantee you I can look deep into your eyes within 3 to 5 minutes I can tell you exactly who you are or where you been what you've done how happy you are how sad you are. And then after I did that I could look at you on the outside and I I could tell you exactly how beautiful you really are if you'd only look all the time you worry about what other people think should be all the time that you put into yourself and love yourself for who you are on the inside not what you look like on the outside. And I hope that you understand that the outside is just a bonus. I cannot tell you who to be how to be what to be but I can tell you this if you love yourself you are perfect and you will meet the right person for you. And I guarantee you if you wouldn't had work done to you you're still going to meet that same person except for you're not going to be real you're going to be something else it might make you happy if it does then more power to you I guess for me I just love natural beauty and who you were meant to be

Rachelspiks · Answer

You do of course realise that all of the "pressures" that society apparently places upon individuals can be completely and utterly ignored, and that the only reason they have any effect upon anyone whatsoever is simply because people take them at all seriously in the first place.
I don't have most of what you describe above, but, more importantly, I simply do not care. Why should I worry about whether or not I have a fat (or skinny) ass? Why should I care about crap like that?
I had to look up what a "cyborgian face" was, and I still don't understand the concept.

t-8900 · Answer

Making money and working hours at a job we hate to please women. Being physically strong and emotionally solid stone with no ability to show emotion or ever break down. We can't cry, we can't complain, we must be honorable and chivalrous, we need to push forward always and we need to protect society at large. We are not allowed to choose our relationship dynamic and always dominate the woman in it. We need to be ready, willing, and able to lay down our lives without question for home and country. We are to accept being expendable and put ourselves last in every situation. Anything less than this makes us "pussies", "betas", "cucks", "rejects", "losers".

Nightless · Answer

As a man, you're expected to be smart, good with money, relentless (in all aspects), strong in mind and body, hard-working no matter the circumstance, even if you lost someone dear to you, or were in a terrible accident. You're expected not to complain, whine, or cry. No weakness is allowed to exist in you if you are a man. Even if you somehow manage to achieve all of this, you are seen as 'toxic' because you are a man, thus by definition, toxic masculinity is in your blood. Thus, you are evil. and so many other damn things (the list is ridiculous and long).
Lastly, you must do all these things alone. Because that shows 'true strength'.

Yes. Society in general is a toxic mess. Admittedly, I have seen perhaps some of the worst society has to offer, so take what I say with a hefty bit of salt.

Oigit · Answer

I don't feel any pressure from it. I think the idea of society can create a line of thinking where we end up putting a lot of pressure on our own shoulders. Because we end up creating a mental narrative that if we do not live up to the pressures of society, we are not a worthwhile member of it. Mental narrative can be extremely dangerous be can we can start seeing them despite them not even being their.

So you should ask yourself do you honestly think society is putting that pressure on you or is that a negative mental narrative speaking?

ShadezMcgee · Answer

That is merely physical. There is more pressures than physical. I have a list that I am sure many men would agree with below. These are some of the standards that follow us every day.

1.) Be in shape
2.) Be confident
3.) No emotional weakness/Have emotional control at all times
4.) Have finances in order
5.) Be a productive and recognized member within social circles and society
6.) Be a leader
7.) Be on your purpose/grind
8.) Be self dependent and a self starter
9.) Achieve results with goals set
10.) Be a an unshakable rock for those around us that we care and provide for

This next bit below is what tends to happen if we don't do this.

1.) We are invisible to many
2.) Low value and self worth
3.) No dominance or assertiveness
4.) Lack of romance/sexual life
5.) Lazy and out of shape
6.) No purpose or reason to be ambitious in life
7.) No social proof, friends or good relationships
8.) Broke

TonyV · Answer

Well I had a female friend say I'm not masculine cause she's never seen me yell fight or argue with anyone at work, so i geuss we're expected to have short fuses while at the same time not being "toxic masculinity "

Also expected to make the first move 9n women and just be ok with rejection from all the women that dont think we are worth the time of day, just keep asking them all out, but then doing what y'all want we get labeled a creep.

Also seems popular to expert men to use their bodies in ways they are capable of weither they want to or not, like I'm expected to fun some armed attacker, so we have to use our muscular bods for you but we can't expect the same of you.

Oh were expected to shit up and expect double standards, like y'all can publicly talk about "sweatpants season", but I'm sure y'all be pussed if we made a yoga pants season

Slartybartfast · Answer

Pressure to earn, it's why men are %98 of workers killed on the job, it's why men work more overtime, stay at jobs they HATE , take jobs that expose us to chemicals, radiation, temperature extremes , take jobs with longer commutes etc etc etc...

I knew this FACT of life before I hit puberty.

Men earn more to attract women.

Bricealan · Answer

Well, I don't know. Rosabelle, I have had more plastic surgery than Michael Jackson, before he died, and don't have any regrets for any of it.

I profited by it, in appearance and self confidence. I work my ass off in YOGA, have a lean body (5'8" - 138 lLBS) have a flat stomach, decent biceps, etc. etc.

As a guy, I feel as much pressure as anyone, to not only appear attractive to a woman, but for me to be happy with how I appear to myself.

Hanrej · Answer

1. Make stuff happen (like everything)
2. Take responsibility for everything.
3. Defend (with your life) your family and nation.
4. Work yourself to death to support your family.
5. While simulataniously doing number 4 somhow also be a present father in your childrens upbringing.
6. Pay for everything.
7. Approach women.
8. Bend to womens will.
9. Accept that all laws are written to your spouses benefit.

Honesttguy · Answer

Those women celebs look like shiit. I dont know who follows them must be bunch of low IQ wannabees.

Pressure guys experience from society?
Be rich millionaire, be famous celebrity, be 10/10 social skills, be leader, be smart, make no mistakes and ofc good hot looking over 6ft strong muscular body and nice kind father to kids.

b5fan · Answer

Men are expected to be in the top 10 percent of all men. We must prove that we can provide, protect, and procreate. Most gyms are full of men working out to get their body in perfect shape. In the gyms I visited there were around 2 to 3 men for every women working out.
The prototypical man is expected to have:
6 pack abbs
6 figure income
6 ft tall
6 inch member
6 cylinder engine
6 years of college

other wise you swipe left.

SuperDupper10 · Answer

through out life I have felt some pressures to be perfect in so many ways. At my age I have found that you can drive yourself nuts trying to fill the bill, so to speak. Those pressures are still there, but I dont concern myself with it anymore. I am tired of that stress and I am now more than willing to tell people who push thee social expectations were to stuff it. I figure I am who I am and thats either good enough or its not, I dont care either way. If im not good enough for some, they should feel free to leave me alone!

boggboss · Answer

Most of the time those stamderds are pushed by women on women although I will say women are targeted a lot by showing advatisment which is done so well it makes women believe if u don't look like other women that have bought into what they are selling then you won't be as good so it makes your customers also free advitisment for other women who are then scared to be the odd one out

BeMuse · Answer

Those are just superficial things you do to compete with each other to attract a mate. It’s not like people tell you that you’re suppose to die for your country, save your family from a burning building, stay behind on a sinking ship or anything with any real consequence... Get over it, you’re just trying to get laid more easily than the next girl.

Anonymous · Answer

Guys have it a lot easier or a lot harder depending on how you view it. Basically women are much Pickier than guys. So while a woman is expected to have a perfect body. Guys are expected to have a perfect EVERYTHING. Body, mind, attitude, social life, job etc.
Women's expectations are so high I don't even bother anymore.

NewgodX · Answer

Girls always demand
Good jawline, tall, fair skin, good hair, colored eyes, well built, attractive personality and big pockets

Very big pockets

Full of money
Not empty big pockets

And yeah funny as a joker sensitive as a military motion sensor and supportive as a base of the pyramid and available as the oxygen in the air too

If you think my answer is a mess then it is

markayd · Answer

what you have listed is not nearly all what the problems that women face in society. If you think all the problems women face are limited to those , its a sign you're an overly well pampered girl who never had to work towards anything or survive on your own in life.

Chthou95 · Answer

Guys need 6 pack/abs
Strong jawline
6ft
6 inch penis
No facial imperfections (Scars, Crooked teeth, acne etc
Good income
High status
No mental health issues
Confidence
Good personality

I feel like generally men are pressured to have these things to attract or just be attractive

clampfan101 · Answer

I don’t have high expectations in looks. If she’s healthy with a pretty face and pretty hair, she’s got everything in the looks department checked off for me. Plus what’s most important is her being a good Christian and being easy to talk to and have fun with.

Phoenix98 · Answer

To be basically a paradox.

on top of that it’s always fun to be called a rapist and sexist because you have dick or be told that you perpetrate a culture of rape, fear, violence and hatred towards women

among a million other things. Just so much fun bring a man.

FinalFantasyBro · Answer

We are expected to be always prepared for the worst possible scenario. We can't honestly show any weaknesses because we might end up being mock for it, us guys had to get a good paying job while hopefully financially watch over women and children.

Celtero · Answer

An extremely broad question that would take a very long time to answer properly... But standards for being attractive? Make a lot of money, dress well, be charming in all the ways, be just the right amount of aggressive. Never show any weakness and have your life together in every regard.

Anonymous · Answer

"If we don’t have all those we are considered unattractive by society"

That's not at all true. It's nonsense. Men do not "expect" women to have big boobs, flat stomach, big butts and and hourglass body any more than women "expect" men to be tall with a six pack, a high paying job and a really nice car. Those things are the ideal, but most men and women do not get all those things in a mate, nor do they expect them. That's just silly.

MCheetah · Answer

Everything. Plus not being able to complain or cry about it.

Spyre · Answer

Mostly the big pressure is confidence. Men who show hesitation or insecurity around others will be bullied and disrespected, by women and other men. You have to always seem like you have your life together, that everything is easy for you, and that you're not worried or bothered by anything. You also have to be socially extroverted and always speak your mind immediately, yet always say the right thing. Women can get by acting shy and reserved, men will be constantly punished for it.

Sillyboi98 · Answer

Men are judged harshly on both personality and looks. There is pressure to have a great body, flawless face, being physically and mentally strong, and having the right charisma. When men feel like they don’t own any of these characteristics, men begin to question their masculinity.

captain_voidwalker · Answer

Guys are expected to be 6' tall or taller, we are expected to be muscular but not too muscular. We are expected to make more than 100,000 dollars per year. We are also expected to solve all of society's problems whilst simultaneously bieng blamed for all of society's problems and we are not allowed to take any credit for problems we solve

Truthatanycost · Answer

I do not have any pressures from society because I don't pay attention to how they may want me to live, only how I want to live.

Dchrls78104 · Answer

1. Approach women (a minefield, this one). 2. Earn a good salary.  3. Carry every burden on your own.  4. Step up and raise other men's children.  5. Be the strong, silent type.

FilmGuy93 · Answer

Pressure to settle down, pressure to provide, pressure to take responsibility for things that have nothing to do with us, pressure to not express emotion.

Soremain · Answer

I don't think I've ever felt any pressure. I've never even met this "society" guy. I hear people talk about how demanding this society thing is, but I'm having doubts it even exists.

Anonymous · Answer

They get cuckshamed just because they dont mind dating non virgin or promiscuos women while women dont even get cuckshamed for still dating his cheating boyfriend. Guys also get virgin shamed and get also called simp just because they dont hate women- every random nice guy get called simp by immature guys nowdays.

humanearth · Answer

That you have to lights, cars, big house, bank accounts, cellphones and a bunch of useless shit to live

shepardmaddison · Answer

I'm told 5 times a day that I should join the gym haha

Anonymous · Answer

Being tall is about the only unrealistic one. But I believe people create their own pressures. Plenty of girls not wearing makeup are pretty. Plenty of skinny girls getting guys. You're confusing the media with society.

Anonymous · Answer

Fortunately for me I live in a region, where none of this crap happens.
Society here expects you like everybody else to at least pull your own weight in life.
Anything more than that is complementary.
But perhaps it may partially be due to me being a lone wolf and a money maker and a go getter.

KingofCups · Answer

I'd say the biggest pressure is just to have a huge income. Then you can interact with way more women and treat them however you'd like. Otherwise you're just incredibly lonely.

Anonymous · Answer

LMFAO! You're not "expected" to have any of that. It's just that there ARE girls who do and THOSE girls are really, REALLY freaking hot. In fact, they're models. We don't EXPECT the rest of you girls to be models any more than you "expect" the rest of us guys to be billionaires.

This idiotic notion that ideals don't exist or that somehow ideals have become expectations is just completely moronic.

exitseven · Answer

I don't know. I never really cared what society wanted me to be.

moviedude714 · Answer

Be valued and judged by our finances or career so much and having certain social behaviors

Andres77 · Answer

Pay for everything and everything is still my fault.

Paul09 · Answer

To go on dates, to meet new people. So much pressure. Am I good enough? What will I say? Will I sound stupid? Yap yap, dam brain.

Sidfawy · Answer

Every one want me to be perfect but no one is perfect, i only like to do my work and mke my life perfectly as i want not what people want to

anylolone · Answer

Six pack, big pecs, big butt, big shoulders, big arms, big everything, big earnings, etc.

M0use · Answer

Some times I feel like I'm automatically like bad cuz I'm a guy. I don't know its hard to explain. But I feel like pplon the internet just try to make me feel like I don't belong

Starman5 · Answer

I do not face any pressure in the society. I've been told to lose weight just because I'm overweight.

sattii2607 · Answer

For men the two biggest pressures I feel are earning without a break and not allowed to show emotions in public especially when you are sad

Aiko_E_Lara · Answer

*cough*

OnTheLevel · Answer

What I've learned over the years is that the pressure you feel isn't from society, but rather from within you. When you become comfortable with who you are, the pressure vanishes.

Anonymous · Answer

Thats not a pressure. Literally 90% of dudes are considered unattractive. And you think its a big deal if people dont think you're a model. If you're in shape as a female thats all it takes. there's no other pressure 😂

ChefPapiChulo · Answer

somehow guys have to constantly prove they're not rapist. Because women are insane and they think every guy is a rapist.

yesyesyeysyeysae · Answer

must be strong and athletic must treat all women like queen must have good job don't have emotions "be a man" "men are bad"

JesseJayNeak · Answer

Too many to count

Guys what kind of pressures do you face from society?

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Social pressures and expectations?

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