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Why don't more men learn how to flirt? (Page 3)
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I don't know man, I had to deal with a lot of craps in my life. I am even dealing with one now. My mind is full of problems. I can't even conceive the idea of flirting. It's just something I am not interested in.
Well, I am not saying it is easy. And if you have some issues you need to take care of, definitely take time out for yourself. When my sister's passed away man, I was a wreck.
I couldn't even decide how I wanted my eggs in the morning. Much less function like a human being.
Because intentional flirting doesn't work... At least not in my experience.
Well, my experience is very different. I just think this is weird. It isn't like there are women who give men good information on how to get dates, right? If a man is taking instruction from a woman, that is the surest way to getting no dates at all.
No idea...
I don't understand what "no idea" means. Truth of the matter is this, you won't find any man here saying they were taught how to be successful at dating women. . . from another woman.
That simply is not a thing. We have millions of young lonely guys in our society because no one tells them that developing social skills is a must. And in order to be good at something you must practice over and over again.
You're basically arguing with yourself here, hun.
No one ever taught me any social skills either and I've had both parents.
Darling. . . you ain't a man. You don't have to have those social skills. You can be as dumb as a pile of rocks. Guys will still come calling. Men have to have a different skill set than dressing up, putting on makeup, etc.
They have to develop confidence, charm and other masculine qualities to be successful at dating. And this nonsense that all they have to do is "be themselves" is a flat out lie.
So basically, what you're saying is that, as a woman, it is okay for me to end up with any kind of a psychopath (due to a lack of social skills), but men do need those social skills so they can deduce whom to end up with and try to get the best woman possible.,
Nice to know you're so feminist in your thinking... :)
First you must define flirting, everyone has a different definition of what it means to "flirt". To me Craig isn't flirting, he is just being social. Just because a guy is socializing with you doesn't mean he is flirting with you.
How do you define flirting? I just gave hints about what I do. Every guy has to find what works for him. But it has to be playful.
Dude everyone who has watched his show knows he is flirtatious.
You seem to have a definition that includes wanting sex. Craig didn't want sex. He was just flirting.
You know. . . flirting is not serious, right?
I just did, Socializing and flirting are completely different. You an speak to someone and joke around with them without wanting anything more for a relationship. There is such a thing as a friend zone.
Nothing you say has to do with my "take".
I suggest for men use flirting as a way of building confidence and social skills.
Your take isn't accurate,
Craig Ferguson is married.
He isn't flirting with girls, the idea that a guy is flirting with a girl anytime he is speaking to a girl is just some moron trying to push Hookup culture.
Yeah, I don't think you understood a single word of the take.
You don't seem to have a point.
But you can write here to your heart's content.
Thanks for the support!
Because, believe it or not: Some people in this world don't care to communicate in the same manner you do. =^)
We boys are taught to be more aggressive and dogged in our pursuit of girls, whom society socialize to be coy and subtle rather than overt about their desire to bond with guys or they're labelled sluts.
Why are you so judgmental towards the end? I can't flirt, and I don't care, because there's more to life than just trying to impress women! Besides, I actually enjoy being single.
I am "judgmental" because a lot of dudes pretend that they cannot be successful so they don't even try.
If you don't want to try, just admit that. But stop pretending this is something you cannot control or correct.
Man, I hear you. I am so shy in a dating situation and can't get away from it.
Honestly I have no need, I don't see the importance in it. I also don't trust those random guys on youtube who either come up with the cringiest stuff of just give advice so vague that its just practically useless.
Nothing I said was vague. But those excuses young guys give for being alone definitely are.
Frankly I was scared of getting into trouble if I tried in nearly all circumstances. There was just little to no opportunities to safely learn.
There is plenty of opportunity if you can take the seriousness out of it
How do you take the seriousness out of it? I felt I would be facing legal and financial trouble if I did not do it right.
And that's the problem.
A recurring theme in this thread.
1. I zoned in on one women. And I bet the entire farm on her.
2. Either I was going to have success with this one woman or the entire night was going to be loss.
3. So I go slow. Painstakingly slow, I nibble around the edges of every conversation. I play four dimensional chess, I call for a lifeline, etc.
I am just saying maybe that's a plan for failure. Now this could be cultural. But I am thinking not. But most women from my experience, determine within the first few seconds if you are worth it and if they like you. So if they like you, if you keep it light-hearted, flirt for a few minutes, then get out. . . that is not going to destroy anything or ruin you chances. And if they don't like you, you won't be wasting time.
Because my point is to keep it moving. Keep it light-hearted, have a good time. They will signal you if they want something serious.
Some people just can’t or they not good at it so they’ve given up on it. Others are low confidence self esteem social skills etc etc. And some just don’t need to.
it's not something you can learn as it must come naturally or it sounds fake which sounds shity.
I never said all women were great people. Many women are just as shallow, driven by instincts, and fake as the men who are plowing them.
Are you kidding? Most guy that aren't 8/10 or better will get called creeps, called misogynists, humiliating rejection, or get in a sexual harassment claim. it's all bases on if the target of the flirting likes us or not. so we just don't.
Because I don't want to pretend to be someone I'm not. If that doesn't get me girls then I'll just have to come to terms with it. I am not changing who I am.
How is flirting changing who you are? It is like a woman claiming putting on make up changes her personality.
Flirting actually reveals who you are to woman who could be romantic partners.
@RolandCuthbert I don't want to learn how to flirt because I see flirting as underhanded & repulsive. I'd rather date AI Chatbot than flirting with a woman.
Hey dude, I am not going to join your pity party.
It is your party and you can cry if you want to. . .
cry if you want to.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mtCIdpnQoWk
@RolandCuthbert I'm not interested in flirting because it doesn't fit with my core values.
No one is trying to force you to flirt, dude.
Just deal with the consequences like a mature adult.
GREAT QUESTION!!
I think flirting died with the advent of the dick pic. These kids can't have a convo, how are they supposed to flirt?
I wish I had learned. No confidence - late bloomer.
But I am a late bloomer too. In high school and most of college, I sucked!
Don’t think I know how let alone speak to women. Could be gay easier to joke and talk to other guys.
This is so weird to me. I don't get it. I have never had to encourage a woman to talk. They are gonna talk and talk often all by themselves.
Women don’t seem to want to engage with me in convo they are much happier avoiding me entirely
I don't get it dude. You are way better looking than me. And what you are engaging in right now, is social interaction.
Believe it or not.
Just do this with a woman.
I don’t even know what to say to a woman like what are we to even talk about. Being socially awkward all my life I never learned to get along with people especially with women now I’m 28 so it’s much more difficult as you can expect. Never had female companions growing up
Again, you are saying stuff to me right now. I was socially awkward. And believe me. I still am. But I know how to navigate circles with females.
That did not happen overnight. It took years of practice.
If you are a woman, take off your clothes. 99% of men agree with me.
I don't think flirting is as much a guy thing as it is a girl thing.
Because being good at flirting doesn’t matter if she thinks you’re ugly
We have had this answer a dozen times already.
It simply isn't true. Flirting is a gateway to acquiring social skills. In order to date successfully, you have to be able to socialize.
Not true I’m very awkward and stand-offish and women love it
Of course. Women are breaking down the door to get to you.
Nice!!!
No it’s super Annoying because I don’t really want to talk to people
I know dude. Thanks for stopping by to let us know that your issue is too much attention!
Wow. . . that kind of contradicts like 90% of this take. Good job. Stop by some of these thread man.
Help some of these guys out!
I’m just a loner I don’t know if it’ll help them out haha