How do I get a shy guy to ask me out? (Page 2)
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you have a right to simplicity you should not have to do back flips and lower yourself as a person just so he does not feel like you are doing it... . asking him out is not offensive. if he can't handle and appreciate that you have the confidence to go after what you want, he should not be dating.
Its like a game of catch and he's going to copy your level of interest. Always look for ways to step closer and if he steps back take a half step forward, in talking or physically. Its going to be a bit of a long con if you really want him. That will be the best way to pry his shell on his own.
If the guy desires you, he will disregard his shyness. Another way of making comfortable with you would be perhaps do group study, homework, sit with him in lunch, just something that breaks that barrier between you two. Another thing would be to make him feel like you need of him. DO NOT PLAY GAMES. BE SURE THAT HE IS THE ONE YOU WANT AND MAKE A MOVE.
i once liked a shy guy. i'm not the forward type of chick coz of my own insecurities. but with the way we spent so much time together he never made a move and he would put in an effort to hang out. but he suddenly freaked out and i just realised that shy guys were not for me. i can't ask a guy out; it's just not who i am and shy guys want chicks to ask them out first. so if he never makes a move; it's not you... he just isn't confident enough to do it.
I am fairly shy but I don’t think I like the idea of my crush asking me first it’s sets the wrong dynamics from the get go. I might be shy by I still like to be leading things. Just opinion though but something to consider he might react badly if you do as well out of the blue.
I have been there in this situation. I was a shy guy, and it was the first time fir me to take the step. Although we were good friends, but never talked about each other's (I hesitated).
As a person who is shy, the boy will think much and try to know your opinion indirectly either by indirect chats or from mutual friends.
But he will find it very hard to approach you since he likes you and won't risk the friendship bond that easily.
As it happened to me, when I took a step forward risking the friendship bond, I eventually found she also liked me very much. If girl had talked to me first then it works have been perfect as per condition during that time, but it didn't happened.
I don't know why girls wait for boys to approach.
If girls also started taking steps its no harm. Everything's gonna be ok.
Go for it, may be you could gain the best relation ship any one can have.
My best wishes
#justdoit
Well just ask him for coffee or something casual. You don't have to ask him out like bf/gf. Keep the approach casual and make it so that he feels like he's doing most of the work, even though you are. You're a smart woman, and smart women are usually good at making men feel like they are doing the manly whatever when they are really helping them out.
Invite him somewhere, don't make it a date, something small. Go for a little walk, go bowling, something with some interaction. Make sure he knows you enjoy it, maybe ask him to take you somewhere again sometime if he doesn't mind. Compliment him as an individual, go out of your way to do little things with him.
Right don't ask home out, but you can drop hints like telling him you like him or you think he'd make some girl happy and you'd feel luck if that girl was you if he wants to date you he'd probably take that as a chance to get in clean and not get burn shy guys are paranoid of pain
Some males thinks so, like if a girl asks me out I’m not a man and things like that but honestly, I think that doing that only means that she likes him and specially for shy people it could work.
Another option is to the the normal things like expending time as friends, touching her hand, coffee and all those things but to a shy person, probably taking the first step would work the best just make sure you do it without his friends knowing cause they may push him out of the group a little
women should think twice before asking a guy out. In his mind she is temporary/second choice as she picked him. Way better if she makes herself irresistible so he is compelled to do something... and even shy guys will when they meet the right woman. But as a woman you will never know if you are ‘right’ for the guy or not. Only he knows.
That’s extremely dumb. So the woman just has to wait around until the guy has the nerve to ask her out?
Ps. Women usually have more options than men do.
Uh, exactly because you have more options is why you don’t need to wait or ask. Read comments by shy guys in here and you will see it supports my claims.
Ok fair enough
I'm a shy guy myself.
But if a girl liked me, I'd prefer her to approach me/ ask me out if she knew I liked her as well and knew I was too nervous to do it myself.
Wouldn't make less of a man.
Its just that way, I'd defently knows she's intrested insread of it coming across as mixed signals.
*wouldn't make me less of a man*
*intrested instead*
I have to say i am a shy guy myself and i have been in his place before it took me only 1 text cause i said i was such an idiot she repleid with your my idiot so just let him know with a text or personal not straight tell him you like him but say something so he knows you do
If you plan to wait for a shy man to 1st know you're interested in him and 2nd to gather the courage to ask you out, you could wait for a LOOONG time.
It's better to be straightforward and tell him "would you go out with me" or something like that. If he says yes, he's interested.
As look at some opnions I see many so called men who need to grow up, there's nothing wrong with a girl asking a guy out, of course then certain things are reversed in that situation, feeling... excetea, excetea, but I've met very few guys who went through such a situation, and everyone was happy about it.
Unfortunately this is one of those situations where you will have more balls than him and ask him out.
Yeah like it's the same thing of course if she asks him out facing roughly zero chance of a no. Exactly the same as him facing in his mind not only 50/50 but probably being arrested on sexual harassment charges if he misjudges it. Yeah, she's got far more balls than him.
Whoa Chiral, that escalated quickly, sexual harassment charges? Guess you speak from experience.
A guy with anxiety can go from asking out to tripping and stabbing her inthe wrong parts pretty quickly in he's head.
That's what anxiety is. Unnecessary negative thought on a big scale
@BlueDream no I'm not speaking from experience. I'm speaking as a guy who's only ever made the first move once in my life, after several years of agonising self doubt.
I get annoyed easily I'm sorry.
It's one area in which women have a massive advantage and when they don't acknowledge the fact it kind of just seems rude. I don't know. I'm old and bitter.
why is it 'unfortunate' for her if she has courage.
@Analinda1999
Well spotted, I knew there was something else bothering me about that comment..
@analinda if you read her question it sounds like she didn't want to be the one to have to ask him out, didn't want to make him feel less of a man. It's pretty unfortunate to me that its not going her way.
@Chiral, your cranky old ass is looking for ANOTHER reason to disagree with my comment. I got it the first time, you disagree.
You basically need to tell him that you think he's cute and would love to go out sometime. Boys, regardless of if they are shy or not, don't take hints well. Be bold. It's scary but do it.
I'm more reserved myself, but I will work up the courage to ask girls to hang out.
He might be wondering if you really like him vs. just being "nice" and looking to friend zone him. Try complimenting him about something and make EYE contact. Give him a stronger hint.
As a shy guy my best advice is to approach him by telling him how you feel, because that takes the pressure off of him questioning if you like him. I disagree with him feeling like less of a man. It's a compliment to get asked out regardless of gender. If he hasn't done anything yet hints and signs will wear you out and won't get you anywhere
Honestly if he's a shy guy, you should ask him out yourself. Some guys really dig it when girls lead too. I kissed my boyfriend first and he loved it!