Why don't guys ever hit on me in public?

[Anonymous]

it seems like guys in school or in public (at work where I cashier) rarely hit one me. the only guys who have ever come up to me were to ask me for directions while waiting for the train or male professors who make small talk (+50age). guys my age rarely approach me at university, they will sit next to me in class (I don't know if that means anything) or make eye contact but rarely initiate a conversation. I am not by all means ugly, but not a bombshell either. I've only had one relationship so far (im 22) and that was a long distance relationship. I'm worried that if guys continue to ignore me or not approach me, I will be single for quite a long time, and I feel like a need a close, intimate companion. I rarely approach guys (if at all) because I'm terrified of rejection.

people say that I look shy and look like in deep thought all the time, but that couldn't scare away guys could it,if the girl is at least a little bit attractive?

Updates

+1 y

btw, why am I always approached by people for directions? I'm so sick of being a direction giver!

Updates

+1 y

if a guy decides to regularly sit right behind or besides you one day as class progresses, and I always tend to sit int he same seat, can I safely assume that he is interested and he wants me to approach him, or should I just take it as a happenstance?

Every friendship I've made was based on my first approach, rarely anybody approached me first they just give me strong hints...why am I cursed to do all the approaching! geezus.

[udolipixie]

I use the deep in thought look to stop guys from approaching.

It's annoying to be interrupted and intruded on just because some guy is attracted to you.

I don't get why you want to be approached.

But if you do just don't look deep in thought.

[udolipixie]

There's a difference between approaching someone for help & approaching someone for sexual intentions.

[Asker]

well I guess that's true sometimes for me as well. I just want to know why guys my age never approach me AT ALL (twice a semester is the most I'll ever get), it's always the really old guys or random guys who ask me for directions...whatever, I guess it's a good thing actually, in a sense where they don't see you as an easy prey.

[udolipixie]

I gave you why they don't approach

deep in thought = doesn't look approachable to sexual intentions

smiling, eye contact, flirting = looks approachable to sexual intentions

For why old guys approach

deep in thought = doesn't matter if you look like you don't want to be approached I need help

[Anonymous]

If you don't look open to conversations, most guys aren't going to approach. When they make contact, smile and wave at them. You have to look approachable.

[Asker]

does eye contact from a guy (let's say ..when he looks at you when you enter a classroom) for more than 3 secs usually indicate interest? I'm not going to assume that every guy who looks at me is surely interested in talking to me...lol.

[Opinion Owner]

It could, but it doesn't necessarily mean that he is interested. If you catch him looking at you somewhat often, it could very well mean he is attracted.

[Opinion Owner]

Don't most people tend to sit in the same area every time you go to that class? Does he ever try to talk to you?

[Shaun]

I wouldn't hit on a waitress or cashier or bartender simply because I figure she gets it all the time.

[Shaun]

Yes, and the 'deep in thought look' is a typical female tactic when she doesn't want to be approached.

[Asker]

no, actually I tend to do that a lot, and it DOES NOT mean I don't want to be approached. it's just my natural facial expression, and my friends think that I'm in pensive mode...lol, what am I supposed to do about that?! ha.

[Shaun]

If you see a guy you fancy. Look happy to see him.

[Asker]

i have to do a lot of practice flirting...even smiling at a guy takes some sort of immense courage for me. what if he doesn't smile back or initiate a convo...i would take that as a form of rejection.

[Shaun]

That's how it goes.

[Shaun]

Update: Because you're always 'deep in thought' so they think you know your ass from a hole in the ground? :D

[Shaun]

If he goes out of his way to sit next to you, he likes you.