There's this girl who I had a crush on when I was in the 6th grade and I started hanging out with these guys who were bad kids. We were bad kids.
I was kind of a loner and I was sort of becoming part of a group. I knew she was into me but I was just really wild and I always thought that I was going to change something about myself so that I could be worthy of dating her. Because really, I liked her a lot.
I didn't understand all this at the time, but looking back she wasn't the most developed girl for her age, and I was not yet the incredibly attractive man you would meet if you ran into me at a bar today, back then I was a round little umpaloompa who took his bike to get Chinese food and a 2-liter brisk iced tea home so that he could watch movies and fuck around in After Effects.
So what my underdeveloped head (and this by the way is why children are insane) was fail to realise just how maybe I should have been more proactive about someone, who was objectively better than those other people I was hanging out with were and was also really interested in me. Especially since nobody else was back then.
Years later, I matured (just a little bit) . I found myself a little, and decided I was "ready" for her. By then she was smoking hot, I mean, this girl looks like a Instagram model.
I still don't have the balls to talk to her because I feel like she's gonna think I'm only talking to her because she's a bombshell now. She's probably used to tons guys who have so much to offer talking to her. I'm not far from being a starving artist at this point in my life right now which sucks because I actually wasn't doing so bad about two years ago.
The part that hurts the most is that she seems exactly the same as she used to be. And I never see pictures of her with a guy.
I haven't spoken to her in probably more than 10 years. And I really want to tell her how I feel. But I just don't feel right doing it. My last memory of her was her smiling at me and feeling seen.
The big lesson of the story is fuck, all of the people who don't see you. Don't chase after people who are not drawn to you and love the people who love you today because the thing about today is that you have that, you can hold it in your hands and everything else is literally as real as a figment of your imagination. So if you want something, come up with a plan, ask yourself every day "what am I doing to get myself one step closer to what I want today" and do it.
u I had a couple of girls telling me about this, but we were way younger back then... one girl from elementary, a couple from middle school... one in high-school, college, we were all young even kids... and these talks happened when I was early 20's and they just wanted to "let it out" like "finally say it" and in all cases it was just a fun talk about it, something to laugh about
mostly because back then I wasn't only shy AF but I was also clueless about these things so then, you just have a way more casual and relaxed talk about... "did you know? could you tell? did you have a crush on others?" stuff like that
I think most people do not like to hold onto things... and also, don't enjoy having doubts or wondering "why"
in my case, these talks happened because they came out after one or two times going out to catch up and they just came out eventually, and it wasn't awkward or anything
and in couple of cases I even said "I kind of liked you too, but I was just too dumb for, to ever do something about it" lol
We all want to live and want to be loved. Knowing someone had a crush - especially when there is no future is a huge compliment! It takes the other person to surrender their ego to share something as intimate. So yes! There is a point- and that is to make the person feel good.
now, if there was mutual interest and the other person is unhappy in their current relationship it can lead to regret and pain..
so it’s important to understand the current situation of both before expressing..
but I think it can be cute and may even lead to a strong friendship - especially when expressed in older/ more mature age..
Im a tease so i did that a lot in HS just to get it off my chest so that i felt better. Its a selfish move. But its also a way to see how they’d respond. One guy asked if he could kiss me while in class when we say close to study. I said “I dont know.” He goes “you know you want it, i heard you used to like me.” Immediately i got mad deep down becaus i felt like this was a manipulation tactic. (I learned later that my friend told him i liked him.) Anyways, i responded “Key word USED TO.” He then got mad but constantly asked “Why dont you like me now?”
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Because it feels good, I guess. It's something that you'd rather get it off your chest. It makes you feel free. R
Quite relieved.
I was thinking about reassurance or shooting their shot again
I think it can be a nice compliment.
It's probably not for your benefit as much as their own, but if you now have the kind of friendship that's almost more like brother and sister, then it might be funny to look back on.
Also, even if they have no interest in being in a relationship with you now, they probably can't help but wonder what would have happened if they had asked you out, just out of curiosity.
It's like sometimes, when you're pretty sure a girl is interested, you ask her out, but you get rejected - and then you're left wondering if it was your timing, or if you did something wrong, or if she was simply never interested at all and you misread the signs. Honestly, sooner or later, if we were still in contact, I'd probably be very tempted to ask.
Maybe they feared rejection during the peak of their interest in you. That's why they didn't say anything. When they finally confess, they're at a point where they may still find you attractive, but no longer concerned with being rejected. Maybe it's something they just want to get off their chest and were at least curious to hear what you'd say. I've had that happen plenty of times. When asked if I liked them back... I just tell them, "Since you didn't say anything then... I'm not saying anything now. So what we learn?" 😁
I did this to an old crush a few months ago because they showed up in my dream and it brought up those old feelings. So to rip these feelings i told him and complimented him. And he was so nice about it. I felt peace for my younger self. 😌 he said i made his day. Now those feelings are gone. I am free.
I don't see a point in it, but I have told someone I used to like them because they specifically asked.
I didn't like them anymore and wasn't going to like them again because they boasted and made fun of me for liking them.
Then he proceeded to tell me that he knew I trash-talked about him. Yeah, maybe if you didn't stomp on my feelings as entertainment maybe I wouldn't have.
Well, gets it off your chest (1),
(2) you two can laugh it off, (3) you might grow either a new friendship or a stronger one, and (4) honestly, it’s just a compliment to someone that you liked them enough to want to have them in your life more and make time for them. 🙂
I can only think of one circumstance where I did this. I found someone who I knew from college on social media. After exchanging texts with her for a few months I mentioned it, but it was just for amusement sake. The story surrounding it was a fun story.
Outside chance that the other person may come around to crushing them back. Obviously if you had a crush on someone and you seriously do not have any interest or desire in them now... there is no pion to telling them unless you still have an interest... or your just a mean person trying to make them jealous.
If they used to have a crush no longer do than it serves no purpose to inform the other party you might as well just keep your mouth shut now if you still feel that way then you shouldn't say I used to have a crush you should say I still have a crush and maybe you can progress from there
There's this guy who had a crush on me in highschool. I always had a good time around him, we had the same humour, he was always sweet and flirty to me and he looked cute but I friendzoned him because he would've been my first relationship and it freaked me out to not be good enough compared to his exes...
He switched highschools before our last year and I didn't see him again till 3 or 4
years later. I just ran into him with mutual friends and i could see by the looks he gave me that he was still into me.
I was taken by my now fiancée by then so I'm not attracted to this old friend but I just felt the need to open to him in private and let him know I did like him too back then. The reason wasn't cause I felt too good for him or whatever he could easily get any girl with his sweet behaviour it definitely worked on me back then lol although now he should use his charm on another lovely lady who will surely deserve him more than I did.
It was for closure and peace.
I think some people do this because they’re still interested and want to see how you react. Also in the past a guy told me he used to have a crush on me but now that I’m ~older and wiser~ I realised this meant he had a crush on me but didn’t want to ruin the friendship. So he essentially said that to see how I’d react and take the next step if I was interested too.
Once to me. She was even awkward as an adult. It was honestly cute how she told me but I was unsure how to respond. I tried to be as nice as I could and made a joke about young love and tried to change the subject to how she was currently and just the play it off.
I sometimes wonder what happened to this girl who had a crush on me during my sophomore year in high school, at the time I thought we wouldn't make a good connection or fit but looking back I sometimes wonder how my life would have turned out if I had pursued things further with her
I think it's about getting that off their chest. They might of become more comfortable around you to tell you that now, but they also might still have feelings for you. This is my own experience, I told her that when I knew her better and I did hope she would be interested. Otherwise, I wouldn't bother to say anything.
It's possible that they just want to get it off their chest and give the person a compliment. It's also quite likely that they might want to give it another shot if the person said "I had a crush on you too".
I used to be interested from a sexual perspective , some that I suspected I could have slept with , Id go back and say " Do you remember , this particular event " ? , Had I tried a bit harder , would we have been happening that night? , rarely has the answer been NO , virtually always YES , which Id suspected , but of course there were always other reasons too , boyfriends , girlfriends , general circumstances , I find it interesting.
Its kind of the same thing.
I've had this once, 1 woman had a "baby crush" on me once.
My first thought was "What? Not anymore? Is your interest in me now officially gone? Why are you telling me about this now? We could have had a lot of fun together, but you didn't do enough to act on it. What am I suppose to do about this now?"
A popular girl that my dad had a crush on in high school told him years later that all through high school she had a huge crush on him. As is the case with most girls she never asked him out. As is the case with most guys, any signals she gave him, he missed. So they never actually dated, and they were in committed relationships when she told him, so there was no chance they'd ever do anything about their feelings.
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