When dating how soon should a guy wait before making a move?

Question

I was just wondering how soon should a guy wait before making a move on a girl when they start dating. I am interested in comparing what men and woman have to say about this.

hungergames22 · Accepted Answer

So... the first date, I think is WAY to early.  Sometimes, the third date is too.  But you can usually tell by body language, and inferred meanings, that a girl who doesn't want to make the first move wants you to.  I think it is classically fashionable to let the guy make the first move... but what is the first move to you involving?  Is it a kiss, or just putting your arm around her?  Holding hands, or even more?  I think more than holding hands for extended periods of time is a little too much for a first date.  Though, I don't think there is a set mathematical equation for how many dates it takes before it's okay to make a move.  Just watch what she says and does and supplement what you think she would want you to do!

DishLady · Accepted Answer

They THINK they want her to make the first move only because then they get to feel flattered AND they don't get confused by the loathsome "mixed signal"... Only scientific research shows that men are more likely to leave the women who initiated the relationship in pursuit of a woman who requires them to make the first move. Hmm.

Personally, I still think that there are as many types of men and women as there are grains of sand. In the end, who and when to initiate anything really depends on the type of guy and girl involved.

xobrowneyedbeauty · Accepted Answer

wowww a quarter of the guys want the girl to make the first move?! no wonder nothing goes anywhere. the girl is (in most cases) not going to make the first move! in my experiences, if the guy doesn't make a move the girl assumes he's not feeling it. so she's not going to do anything. I say third date is good. but hey a kiss on the first date isn't a BAD thing. :)

stubbsy · Accepted Answer

There is no move to make, you should wait until the girl is ready for your approach, and that I am afraid is something you need to work out when that is, because classic signs are not always the same with a girl with talent, so spend some quality time with her getting to know her, because this is what allows you to know when she's ready for your move, don't ever rush or push a woman into something she is not ready for, because this usually ends out with someone getting hurt, be cool, be respectful and let her hint to you she is ready and not before.

bauer · Accepted Answer

You make a move when she wants it.  That can be anywhere from within the first 5 minutes of meeting a girl to several days.  It really all depends on the girl.  I've hooked up with girls within 10 minutes of meeting.  It just depends on the situation.

TheoryOfAvarice · Answer

What does make a move even mean?

Also we're all different, it totally depends on the two people and what they're comfortable with, how well they know each other, what their ideas of how things should go are... if you feel like kissing on the first date then just go for it. If you're not sure, then wait. If you want to try more but she seems hesitant, either ask or talk about it, or just be safe and wait. There's not like set rules and stuff about how all this should go. Just base it off of what you're feeling, kind of go with the flow.

If you're going to sit around and wait for two and half months before you "make move".. well that's just dumb.

lananoel · Answer

It is always polite to wait until the lady is ready. When she can't stand it any longer she will take the lead way and kiss you. I'm tired of this " a gentlemen does..." BLAH BLAH BLAH... Yes it is okay for him to lead sometimes. Others why not let him relax and the lady go to him.

MWalsh89 · Answer

Don't let her make the first move.

It also depends on your comfort with one another. If you guys are feeling it on the first night, go ahead, if not, wait it out until you think you're both ready I guess...but don't wait too long. Definitely by the third date I'd think.

hot_princess7 · Answer

First date = too soon.

Second date = she will be expecting it.

Third date = pushing it; borderline acceptable.

Fourth date and beyond = she's moved on, dude.

Exception is if you are very young and/or this is your first relationship - then I would tolerate up to one month, depending on how often you see each other.

l-hedoniste · Answer

As of my reading this, about 2/3 of women are expecting a move by date number three. Listening, guys? No going around in circles for months; first, second, third date, a fourth if you're really smitten. After that, raise the sail and cast off. If she wants you, she has your number.

P.S.: Don't even consider waiting for her to make the first move. Not gonna happen. Grow some stones, take the heat.

Roseliver · Answer

Depends what move? If it's a hug... first date and second date... hmmm, I think third date should be a kiss. Eugh, I've had a guy fully make out with me on the first date in his car. It was horrible, I couldn't even breathe because he had me pinned down so hard on the seat! So it's now changed my perception of it all!

jeffr · Answer

You pretty much have to treat every situation differently according to what's going on or not going on. If you don't know what's going on then waiting a certain amount of time probably isn't going to help you.

typicalgal · Answer

Honestly in the day in age we live in our expectations of each other has change, yes I would love for a guy to show some class and chivalry knowing I would be very greatfull. How ever if I knew I wasn't losing a whole lot I would muster up the courage to make a move on this amazing man, so to speak.

ImALuvrNotAFighter · Answer

It depends on what you mean by "making a move."  If you're referring to kissing her after a date, I would say date number 1 or 2.  If you're referring to going beyond that, it's probably best to let the woman let you know when she's ready.

malekoniky · Answer

What exactly is "making a move"? Is it trying for having sex with her?

I think that it's very individual from situation to situation. But I won't do it before like a month of dating. Few months is best option I guess.

I-B-C · Answer

Men want women to make the first move so that a woman doesn't cry rape. Even if he doesn't rape her, she can still plead it in court and she'll win...because she's a girl.

Mr_Solo_Dolo · Answer

What do you mean by move? Like try for sex or just a kiss? If it's kiss I say third date. If it's sex I'd say  month.

Anonymous · Answer

When you say "make\ing a move" what are you implying? just a kiss, making out, sex?

TheGodEmperorLeto · Answer

First move? As in towards sex? I'd say a few months, personally. No need to rush anything. But in the end it's however damn  long it seems to take until she's that comfortable.

Elmo420 · Answer

I refuse to make the first move.  Id rather be alone than pissed of for being rejected and lose a possible friendship.

rory520 · Answer

I guess this depends on what move you were referring. Kiss first date. After that I would say yes let the woman direct the speed.

PinkcupcakeXD · Answer

Well depending on how things go..i would say that you could make a move on the first or second date.. depending on what kind of girl you're dating.

ZoesFine · Answer

If you are both feeling something and the time and opportunity are right then lean in for that kiss.

drummerdude25 · Answer

He should make a move when it feels right...

lapa5 · Answer

What move? There are many... =/

WeaponZero · Answer

What do you mean by move?

sikoo31 · Answer

as soon as she's comfortable with it.

InMyHeart · Answer

third date.

Anonymous · Answer

on the 7th date

When dating how soon should a guy wait before making a move?

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