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Never...Ever...Date...A...Damaged...Girl...! (Page 3)
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Same with guys, don't waste your time on damaged goods.
As a female, I applaud your judgement on this. I have done a mytake that sort of around the same subject. THose girls should just seek a counsellor, get better and move the f*** on.
I would also add a 5th, which is the never end cycle of the “pull away”. Because her her negative experiences, she has formed a method of pulling away whenever the guy gets too close. This is primal and can only dealt with by a counselor. With out therapy the rotation never fails and the girl will retract whenever things get too emotional or you get too close. She has to maintain control for what she believes is her own safety. You could be the best guy but to her you’ll still somebody who can hurt her.
This makes sense... I would just advise damaged people to let go of the thing from past, and just care and show love to people, that are presently with you... but if you're paranoid about getting hurt again, just don't get too attached, so in case you actually do get hurt, you can just say f*** it, and move on
Wow this reminded me of my ex. He would constantly tell me how all his ex's cheated on him. How he would never buy another woman anything. So I broke up with him, he begged me to stay and still trying to get me back. I left because I got tired of paying for everyone's else mistakes.
I find this very rude and insulting! Yes I can admit I'm a damaged girl, but my boyfriend is changing me for the better! He's strong, tough and inspiring! If it wasn't for him I would still be the girl who sat in the corner and didn't let a damn person near me! Only weaklings run away from a "broken girl"
Your boyfriend can't change you. You change from within by yourself. It this relationship ends you're back to square one. You have to work on yourself by yourself and be content with who you are.
Don't you think it's kinda sad that you rely on another person to change you? I certainly do
He's opened up my eyes, he didn't change me exactly but he helped me change and even after he leaves I will be a changed person
Yeah that's good the real test to see if you have changed is if your relationship ended. Not saying it will though
You don't know, a lot of these bitches just put on a damaged act for fun. Generally speaking women have it much easier in our society than a man does, and there is much less chance of any REAL damage occurring. If they can hold a job and keep a car, there ain't a damn thing wrong with 'em and they need to quit screamin'. These are the bitches that get good decent well intentioned guys busted for shit they'd ordinarily never even DREAM of doing to anything that wasn't the spawn of satan himself. "Ohh, he beat me!!" Maybe you shouldn't have tried to kill his dog?
"She told me that pretty much every guy that she's dated never did anything nice for her. They never took her out to a nice restaurant to eat, they never bought her anything on holidays like her birthday"
Warning flag in itself if she put up with that for a year+ lol.
Interesting article
". You stand there like a retarded bag of sand" made me lol
Well this is pretty depressing, since I am a damaged/broken girl myself. Not all girls are like this... I never use guys as my punching bag. It's pretty sad that your telling all the guys not to date us. Damaged girls can be fixed if they take the right actions in terms of whatever made her damaged in the first place. For example for me, I go to therapy and counselling and it has improved my state of mind so much.
He's warning fellow men about a danger. That's not "sad" that's "considerate."
Hurt people need attention but if in the cases you described then they are worrying over pointless drama and should definitely be left to themselves. But a REAL damaged person would apologize for simple things like "wasting you're time" when you talk to them and would say thank you for pretty much everything. Because often times the person who gives out the most love really needs it most.
Girl #1: She measured her love based on how much money someone spent on her.
Girl #2: If she was really hurt after that other relationship she wouldn't have snogged you in your car, she'd probably avoid the whole relationship all together.
Girl #3: If she lives by the half-thought-out assumptions then she's a sexist but if she later calls to "cuddle" then tell her to **** off and call her a drama queen if needed because if she was really hurt she wouldn't have said anything angry unless you told her that she can vent on you. If she yells like that for no real reason and still expects you to be faithful then she doesn't deserve your time. And make sure you let her know that.
most of them are damaged. i see so many damaged here as well...
the answer is the love them and choose to love someone that you think is worth it. the world is broken and people are cruel, its more common than not. but if we have a hedonistic self seeking/opportunistic attitude, thats what make things worse. one doing whats best for themselves continues this cycle.
I don't believe that this is true. I am troubled, have had a horrible past with guys but I don't throw a guy around and fuck him over. I take my past to make my future better. Though I do agree that you should be careful but don't completely disregard a girl all together
"Damaged" doesn't have the same meaning for everyone. I think of damaged as: even though it happened 3 years ago, you still can't quite move on with your life. All humans need repairing, but ya gotta know how to repair yourself.
You're an unattractive nice guy. Women aren't dumping you because they are broken. Any woman would dump you.
lol, u r very unfair
@Tormentarian I am just telling the truth. All those women gave him a shot, which indicates he has a decent level of attractiveness. Maybe he's smart, interesting, handsome... Who knows.
But as soon as they dated him for a while, they lost interest and dumped him even though he "did everything right".
I did the same to a few guys and I know MANY girls who did it as well. It's not because we are all damaged, it's because dating a nice guy doormat who doesn't know how to assert himself, lead and be a man in the relationship is like dating a plush toy with a strap on.
Girls settle for guys like this, they don't stay with them.
Especially if their ex "was a jerk" (read: a man with balls who wouldn't put up with her shit) and in order to heal, the girls were dumb enough to overcorrect by dating this kissass.
LMAO OMG I burst out in laughter after reading this! This is sooo golden! You will definitely be one of the comments I direct my response to in my next followup to this topic. Look out for "Never Ever Date A Damaged Girl! (The Follow-up)" Sometime today you guys. Stay tuned!
More self deception in the form of a myTake?
Well if you're having fun I guess it's ok... :/
well said but i don't think this only applies to woman, i dont think people should get into relationships if they have emotional or psychological damage,
only people who are healthy should enter relationships
We will always carry baggage but I think youd need to be in a place where your mentally and emotionally strong to be with someone
exactly bro =)
Some of us chose to alone and do the healing first. I recently dated a guy who himself was damaged as well. It turned out bad, thankfully I took responsibility for my choice and ended after 6 months. I realized that I need more time to work on myself.
Date them if you are good in challenging. It's more of a challenge but rewarding if you can get her out of the shell she made for herself.
And IF you are good in challenging means you are damaged too. Some girls might say they don't need to be fixed but the same girl still has that dream of loving someone and getting her emotions fixed. If you can't challenge an emotionally damaged person then yes stay away.
Your bad experiences with "damaged" girls doesn't define what others' relationships with "damaged" girls will be like.
I really like this MyTake! This applies only to chicks, but to any manipulative person. I think you summed everything up really well with:
"This is REAL LIFE, and the reality of it is if she really wanted to be emotionally fixed, she would seek professional help and wouldn't be dating to begin with. "
Yeah. If people want to fix something, they can take personal responsibility and not USE other people. Great MyTake dude.
I have a question though: Out of all the people you dated how many crazy ones did you meet? I always though dating was a simple thing, but are the crazy people common?
This is one of many reasons I do not ever want to date. Too used to being single and like it too much now , I don't want to carry another person through life ( did that with my ex wife ) , single dad , working FT , so have enough work and commitment as it is.