Girls, why do guys have to be perfect for you to date them?

[Anonymous]

Talking very good looks (Six pack muscular, lean, slay facial structure, jawline)
Over 6ft
Extroverted high social status.

It's like the tides have changed and now girls need a guy to be perfect to be dateable. I already know what kind of comments I'll get but I'm genuinely interested to know why. Thanks

[Anonymous]

That’s inaccurate. What matters most is how a man treats you. I have dated many men and most of them were nothing like that. Most of the men I’ve dated had only one or none of those features. I didn’t care, but most of them were off putting because of the way they acted. Some of them were VERY clingy and told me they loved me after one date (red flag). Some of them treated me poorly or were too distant (were always “too busy” for me, even when they literally had little to nothing to do on a daily basis).
The only man to ever break my heart was my height, dad bod, decent face, somewhat social. He has a large social media following though, probably the reason he thought he was hot shit and treated me poorly. After about a month, he expected me to stick around and make time for him when he stopped doing same and couldn’t commit. I really liked him but had to end it.
The only guy I’ve dated that fits your description is my current boyfriend, but what drew me to him was our connection and the way he treated me. We met on tinder, his pictures were ok, no pics of his body, I never asked how tall he is, knew little of his social life. This is all I had to go off of for almost a month before we met in person. The conversation flowed smoothly. He always texted back within an hour or two (even though he goes to uni, has two jobs, and is the frontman of two bands), always asked me about my day, pretty much just showed me I matter while still having a life outside of texting me. He is the ONLY guy I’ve dated to treat me like that and he continues to treat me like that.
He treated me like a priority as opposed to an option while taking things at a reasonable pace as he got to know me. That’s what matters and that’s what’s rare and difficult to find in men (and women!).

[FictionalCharacter]

Yeeeeeah...

Guys with ‘good looks’ like Six pack muscular, lean, slay facial structure, jawline
Over 6ft.

Don’t exactly exist to me or I don’t exist to them lol. Either way, never came across to one of those ‘gods’ and interacted with them. I mostly have talked with awkward, shy, funny personality guys. But, sometimes I develop feelings for these guys. That most of the time they reject me cause of my ‘unique’ personality. Or they’re not ready for a relationship.

So, from then on I’ve separated two different category guys: the looks and the brains. Found out I’m not compatible with either lol. I’m too ugly for the looker and too dumb for the brains. Or I’m just ugly and dumb 😅. But either way, I’ve accepted this and I keep to myself. Cause I know who I am and what I like.

[jaybee281]

Great thing we don't have to be perfect😂🤦🏻‍♂️it's all in your confidence and the only true part is your social status as in being respected not being the loser of your social circle that's it.. Like an introverted person can be more confident than any extrovert it's just that he'll need time alone after interacting with people and you'll be amazed at the number of guys who have never hit the gym barely workout and always get girls and don't let me get started about the looks like a guy that you see as a 3/10 in a girl's mind he could be an 8/10 because of how he attracted her (behavior and interaction around and with her) and the over 6ft is ridiculous superficial girls say it then probably fall in love with a 5'7 plumber.. If there is one thing I've learned it's that women don't know what they want it's not an insult it's just real

[Anonymous]

Not always. Money can comp for some things. I think it has to do with women like the alphas.. Not just about strength.. Like you can be alpha in other ways to and be super powerful in other ways. Like you already said social status for example. If you are really powerful and popular or whatever that will attract them. Sure they might want to use you for it, but I think that's how most are wired right? To be attracted to that sort of thing. Not really smart tho falling in love with somebody like that tho cause they could potentially hurt you. Just keeping those types as just friends probably is more helpful.

[Alice2398]

Why do all chubby bitter men who blame women for their issues stereotypies us of being shallow when the skinny hot blonde model girl rejects them? 🙄

My boyfriend is over 6ft yes but he also doesn't have a six-pack and is extremely shy, still lives with his mum and dad, has a struggling business at times and a receding hairline but i still love him for him and support him no matter what because he's better than prefect to me even if he doesn't fit stereotype because he is kind hearted, hard working and responsibility for himself amongst other great unique qualities he has that make me love him so much.

[Asker]

I'm not chubby though. And i approach all kinds of women. Not just hot ones

[diamond567]

To be honest sometimes I think that sometimes the pretty face isn’t the option to go for in certain circumstances a guy who maybe might not be like super hot, but really values you for who you are is a true gem. I talked to this guy who was attractive had a very good body, but I later found out and realized that I was just one of his collections of the many girls he had. I am not saying that it’s always this case, but it happens. So don’t feel bad about yourself don’t think that you aren’t attractive believe I struggle with this myself. It’s all about learning to accept ourselves and chin up don’t loose hope you’ll find someone that will truly love you for you someday.

[Cherokeehp]

It’s this sort of sad and pathetic attitude that prevents you from getting a date. Literally NO WOMAN EVER is looking for the perfect man because he DOES NOT EXIST. Everyone has flaws, and that includes handsome men with high social status. Women aren’t looking for perfect men. There are ugly men with girlfriends. There are poor men with girlfriends. There are men who cheat that have girlfriends. Women are just looking for a partner that’s compatible with them.

[Asker]

Then most guys who are not good looking or quote "hot" are not compatible with most women

[Cherokeehp]

Then why are there plenty of ugly men in relationships?

[Asker]

Where do you see that?

[Cherokeehp]

Literally everywhere

[Asker]

Okay but it's not often. Usually the guys are 8 9 or 10s the girls dating

[Cherokeehp]

That’s legitimately not true. You’re just trying to come up with fake to proof to validate your defeatist attitude. Any man can get a date.

[Asker]

I'm not saying every girl is like that. But most girls need the guy to be perfect & have perfect physical qualities

[Cherokeehp]

I am literally a girl, and I’m telling you that you are wrong. But, believe what you want.

[Asker]

Will do 👌

[Mystic_Nova]

Makes me wonder if men like you go outside. Like, do you never see regular guys having girls or something? Am I living in the only town where guys of all shapes and sizes still find partners? Maybe guys as you described have an easier time getting girls, but other guys get girls to.

We all have our tastes, we all do t like the same thing

[Asker]

Most girls do like the same thing though. Tall muscular guys with good facial symmetry. I guess it's hardwired into the brain. Human nature can be cruel to average looking guys

[CarpetDenim]

Are you stupid or something Anon? If women ONLY ever went after attractive men, unattractive men would have been bred out of existence by now.

[Mystic_Nova]

Also, I'm the same can go for men who like women who have curves, thin waste, etc. But we all dont just leave other people with other features out. Everyone dates and marries people who look different and we care about who they are.

If you're unhappy with what and who you are, thats on you.

[Asker]

Nope. You're in the minority then like i told the other girl. Girls want perfect looking guys while us guys we don't care. She doesn't have to be perfect or a model. Girls though see it differently

[CarpetDenim]

They don’t. My boyfriend doesn’t have a six pack (he’s actually kinda chubby), he’s 5’7, and he’s from a relatively lower socioeconomic class than I am. I love him a lot. We’ve been together for years, and I hope we’ll be together for the rest of our lives.

[CarpetDenim]

Judging by your exchanges with the several other women that have answered this question telling you you’re wrong, I’m concluding that you’re a stubborn, closeminded asshole who’s only asking this just for ONE woman to agree so you can say “haha, look, I’m right, all women are like that,” despite the dozens of other women who disagree with you. That’s probably the reason you can’t get a date, dude, not because you aren’t unrealistically attractive.

[Asker]

All you have to do is be an average looking guy for a day and you would see the difference. Not saying all women are like this & maybe you're an exception, but most girls do go after only 8s 9s & 10s. The perfect looking guys

[CarpetDenim]

Shut the fuck up.

[Asker]

You shut the fuck up Bitch

[CarpetDenim]

No..

[Asker]

Okay...

[CarpetDenim]

Okay

[AzureGirl]

You do realize that everyone has a different taste, right? The guy you described doesn’t attract everyone. My fiancé is nothing like the guy you described and I’m obviously very attracted to him. People want someone they’re attracted to but they’re not all attracted to the same type.

[Asker]

But a lot of girls are attracted to that though. And it seems like i have to look like those guys to be accepted or worthy

[AzureGirl]

Maybe a lot but certainly not all. And don’t feel the need to change yourself into something you’re not to try to impress girls. You’re worthy just as you are.

[Asker]

Society & the real world say otherwise

[AzureGirl]

Eh, I’ve found society isn’t always correct.

[AaronKrieger]

You do realize the average height is below six foot for a reason; women prominently have children with guys under six foot. Most people that are married aren't perfectly good looking or have the best social skills. Most people that have kids aren't perfectly good looking or have the best social skills.

Yet somehow guys must have to meet those standards? Yeah okay, in most relationships guys don't meet those standards. Look around at relationships in the real world and you'll notice that.

[CarpetDenim]

^^^^^^^ Exactly this.

[AaronKrieger]

The only reason this guy posted this is probably because a girl got to him, so now he's having a hissy fit.

[likelyOK]

It definitely depends on the girl most girls don't have high standards like that anymore, it may just be the girls you are approaching, that being said if a girl is beautiful too it's perfectly reasonable to want certain attractive features in mind. Tall and Attractive is important to me but the guys I date definitely don't have six packs LOL. I feel a lot of those types of guys seem like they are only after sex.

[Asker]

I don't go after just hot girls. I go after all kinds. And she doesn't have to be perfect. But it seems like guys have to be perfect to you women

[likelyOK]

no that's definitely not the case

[Tamera952]

Have you seen the guys that girls date? Are you kidding me 99.9% of them are not anything close to as you described perfect. What you described is the unattainable unrealistic highly idealized perfect guy which doesn’t exist in reality hello? So the answer is no of course I don’t have to be perfect none of them are and none of them are even close

[boggboss]

Yet this is false for the most part yes women Alan be picky with who they pick but that's because they get that chance with how dating works many guys that don't fit that criteria get women or find love my brothers 5"4 and is a player I'm fucking overweight but found a girl that's stunning and loves me

[Asker]

Sp you're saying that most guys are fucked?

[boggboss]

How are most guys fucked if I gave 2 examples of guys that don't fit the mold u posted getting women many guys cry and complain how hard it is but you don't realise that complaining like that is what drives women away

[Asker]

Or looks lol

[boggboss]

Yet looks are not objective what I find unnatractive u may like or fire versa it's shown many times that a person's attraction goes hand in hand with how someone feels for them yes that don't mean u can make every girl like you but vary few people are actully that ugly that no one will date them for that reason

[peacchyy]

They don't. My boyfriend is 5'11 and really skinny. He doesn't have a lot of money, and he doesn't have a high social status either. He is such an introvert, it's insane.
But to me, he is perfect. I wouldn't want anyone else, nor do I notice anyone else.

[TheLittleInnocent]

They don't (¯―¯٥) my current boyfriend for example; hez not some jacked golden haired Lancelot who comes from a family that was noble in the middle ages and still has wealth from then. Hez about 5'6 not at all jacked he can be slightly extroverted but also introverted he doesn't really have a high social standing. Hez still funny and sweet and devilishly sexy etc. The Lancelot thing is BS

[heavyjordy]

This is a super interesting question! I was all of those things and got hit on at least twice per day - I lost the six pack and suddenly nobody ever asked me out. I feel like guys need to be absolutely perfect for attention these days, just as has been the case for girls for the last few years too. I'd say the cause is the internet and social media making everyone look more perfect than they are.

[Midnight_Kiss]

Sounds like you're focusing on the girls who want to date the text book guy they think will boost there worth.

Most of us don't want the action man built, pretty boy whose generally vain and selfish, on actual fact we would like to meet a guy whose genuine, honest and doesn't look for social acceptance or internet likes to boost his ego.

[Ellie-V]

Sweetheart what work do you live in?
Open your eyes and look at all the dudes with nothing going on for themselves, some ugly, and barely put together in all aspects of life... they still get girlfriends and hoes.

[Asker]

I see with my black pill eyes

[Isten]

Most probably you are going after the 8+ ones in looks, from which you shouldn't expect lower standards.
But if you are geniunily going after average girls, then you must do something extremelly wrong.

[Asker]

I approach all kinds of girls. I don't just approach 8s & to be honest she doesn't have to be perfect. But it seems like girls only want the best looking guy

[Isten]

That's far from the truth, which just proves my point. Maybe you don't even realise what average is, because of all the pics on social media. 🤷🏻‍♀️
I don't want to sound all bitter, but the first step for improvement is always realising our faults. Insanity is when you do the same thing over and over again and expect different results.
Women are not an entity, just like men aren't one either, everyone is an individual.

As far as my experience goes, guys often make the mistake of underestimating us when it comes to intelligence/accomplishments. Once a high school dropout started explaining EVERYTHING to me to try to show off his intelligence and win me over. Fun fact: I'm an engineering student.

[thegirlfromthething]

They don’t. Every day I see girls with normal, unremarkable boyfriends who don’t look like models and aren’t very popular or influential. They’re just regular people.

[Asker]

They have to be good looking though. They have to be. No girl will date a guy unless he's perfect

[thegirlfromthething]

Where do you live? Most guys, including ones with girlfriends and wives, aren’t good-looking. Most of them are average looking people who make mistakes and you’re kidding yourself if you think they’re all perfect.

[Asker]

They're good looking then. Most girls won't date a guy unless he's quote "hot" & very attractive/perfect

[thegirlfromthething]

Most of these guys are average looking by conventional standards. Most women would not say they look perfect, so even if their girlfriends think they’re hot (and that perception is swayed by personality), they’re not as physically flawless as you seem to believe.

[Asker]

That's just you being nice & trying to politically sound correct. But in all reality and from what other guys have seen, girls have higher standards & it feels like even if it's not perfection 100%, the guy still needs to be at least an 8 or over

[Jemini_Crocket]

They don't have to be perfect. This is maybe what primadonnas want but not a normal girl. You may be going after the wrong girls I believe.

[Asker]

But what do you mean by wrong girls? I approach all kinds of girls

[Anonymous]

Here we go again, another short chubby loser bitter at every girl that ignores him because he chooses not to take care of him self then blames it on women. 🙄😄

[Asker]

I'm not chubby though. And i approach all kinds of women. Not just hot ones & honestly they're the last kind of girls I'd approach since they don't have any personality

[Opinion Owner]

Right... so maybe being rejected by all of them might be telling you something about yourself. Fix yourself.

[Asker]

Fix what though? I have to improve for them?

[Opinion Owner]

Lol duh. Girls don’t want trash. Grow up, stop complaining online and make shit happen.

[Asker]

So dating is a contract? I need to meet the requirements to make the contract work?

[Curiousgirl122101]

To be completely honest with you I don't want a perfect guy. I want someone loyal who I know I can trust. The perfect looking guys tend to know they are perfect