Girlfriend of 3 years now wants to sell nude pictures. Do I chill or freak out?

[Alex____]

So i'm in a serious relationship with a girl for for over 3 years, we basically moved in to my place after we knew each other for 2 weeks. We had HUGE up and dows since then and were about to fall apart several times out of jealousy and other drama, but are still together. I'm 30 and she's 23 and i feel like she became very mature in the past year or so and we have WAY less drama but still love each other for sure.
I have to admit that often i kinda fell in her trap so to say by reacting to something which was supposed to test me. And in the end the little problem became a huge one because i was obsessing about it. I learned a lot trough this relationship, and a big lesson for me was to chill out when she says something which threatens my picture of out relationship that she is potentially my dream girl for life.
So now she came up with the idea to sell nude pictures of her to someone who she doesn't know via a female friend of hers. He pays a lot (and seems to be a creep by the way) and since my girlfriend currently struggles financially and i'm not really able to support her, she thinks about actually doing it.
I almost weirds me out how i'm chilled about it, but also i know that when i freak out about the fact that she even thinks about it i'll most likely dramatize things. Of course i don't want some random creep pay my girl for her nudes... And when i asked her about it she told me ''it's not your business...'' ... and i know it's some sort of game again and i don't want to fall for this shit test. I could go on and on about presuppositions etc. but i'd like to get some opinion of you girls about this situation. You can ask me about details of course. I just don't want to fuck it up. Kinda think that if i just chill out and make her do what she wants, maybe it's a wiser approach... kinda can't imagine her to pull it trough, feels like a shit test. What do u think?

Updates

+1 y

Aigh, thanks guys. I had to hear it.

[Daniela1982]

I think you moved in together before you really got a chance to know each other. I'm sure sex had a lot to do with it. Guys think with their smaller head most of the time as you have demonstrated. You are not in what I would define as a true relationship and I don't think the love you feel is anything but sexual considering what you have revealed. I think you are in for a rocky ride and are being used to an extent. Her selling sex to pay the bills makes her a pseudo prostitute and you a pimp. I honestly think you teamed up with the wrong person and the drama will only get worse. I'm hoping you know what you have to do. Because if you don't you are in for a hard fall.

[Kiss_Me]

I could write a book why this is broken on so man levels. Kick this girl to the curb so fast she bounces. There is a HUGE "I told you so" waiting to be said from virtually everyone you know. Most will be polite enough not to actually say it, but it will be there.
First, grow a spine, then... and ONLY then... find a new girl.

[TheFlak38]

Selling online porn has become the norm now. If you dont like it then stay single. You thought tinder was bad for women? No man. Here comes onlyfans to completely destroy them. Give it another 3-5 years and you won't be able to find any young woman in her 20's that hasn't done online porn.

[ValleyofDrakes]

Neither.

If that bothers you to such a degree, you should have no problem saying "You can do whatever you want with your body but I can't be with a woman who does that type of thing".

Period.

[MannMitAntworten]

If this is a shit test, you are failing. The correct response would be “No” or to inform her that her other option is to pack her bags. Even if she doesn’t have any self respect, at the very least you should for your own self.

[Alex____]

Ya man, i think you're absolutely right by the book. The first time she mentions this ''opportunity'' i laughed it off and told her that it's of course not ok. But then she came with some past stuff how i hurt her by by also keeping secrect blabla. Don't want to go into details but i didn't cheat on her or so. In my opinion it's just overdramatized shit that she is still butthurt about which was harmless and isn't comparable to selling nudes (short: i'm a photographer and made nudes of a female friend, and i even asked her if it's ok, and i assured her (and i assure you), it was just for artistic purposes. I of course quit shooting any kind of stuff once i realized her passive discomfort with it.)
But well, if you say i'm failing the shit test, not sure how to come back other that just tell her ''it's not my business? Aight - let's see what you do.'' While she of course knows my position and that i'm not comfortable with it... I don't want to see all of this as some soet of strategy game and her as an enemy, but in my mind i think, if she pulls it trough i will react heavily on that, just not sure how yet. At least i will see her in a different light for sure if you know what i mean.

[MannMitAntworten]

I know plenty of photographers who have done the same. A non issue and you even just stopped for her piece of mind. That aside, her wanting to do this as some sort of reciprocity or for money, still is a no go in my world. I would have been quite candid with my no and pointing to the door which she would be welcomed to walk through after leaving her key. Again, that is just me. I am aware and so should she be so that she can be replaced by someone with enough brains to earn the money she requires without resorting to making her ass public. If she does not, she is not the resourceful woman I thought she was and time to part ways... again, this is just me speaking for myself.

[FreshOutaIdeas]

@Alex____ Your girl is likely still just menstural about what you explained, and has suggested this to goad a reaction out of you. You politely but firmly tell her no it is not ok, if she wants to do that then she knows where the door and her packed bags are. If she backs down, ask her to stop being a child and tell you like a grown ass woman of what she still feels hurt over. So many guys miss this in modern relationships - you NEVER put up with any shit testing, you nip it in the bud and if she can't wind her neck in, get rid of her.

[Gisellefox]

@Alex____ It sorta reminds me of the shit I say to my boyfriend to constantly test it I still have the power between him and me. I say something along the lines of me wanting to “fuck someone else”, when he behaves in any sorta way that I don’t like. Then, he immediately caves and gives me all his power and I feel good. Then, somehow I get this urge to see how far I’m able to push it and say some other inappropriate shit. It’s something I know I am doing and am aware of, but can’t stop. So, I’m thinking your girlfriend is passive/covertly (but deliberately) saying/doing things to hurt you. Trust me, it will get worse in time.

[Gisellefox]

@Alex____ You should let her do it and that will show you that she’s bluffing.

[Gisellefox]

Many typos. My apologies!

[RastamanJah]

Remind her that it was your idea, have clients lined up; get your cut off the top, make her get a second job selling nudes to buy the film. In the camera

[Gisellefox]

Weird advice.

[Avicenna]

That’s worth freaking out about

[JFelix]

I personally would freak out can't lie

[startingfitness]

A couple of slaps should set her right.

[Iron_Man]

You freak out and do something about it

[Alyssa11]

Freak out lol.

[Alyssa11]

I want to add that I am about the same age as your girlfriend. I think the drama you're describing in your Q is basically her, and I can see that you really want to maintain your RS. The thing is there is no need for so much drama anyway, she sounds very immature. Secondly, idc how broke she is that is morally wrong and actually disrespectful to you. It is your business because you are her boyfriend and not just boyfriend but someone she has chosen to commit to and someone she even lives with. Don't be afraid to speak up, it's not fair that you have to keep your feelings bottled up just to avoid the drama. That's not a healthy relationship.

[TeeSquare]

Chill

[newfreshstart]

your age says 42

[Gisellefox]

That’s what I was thinking!!