Girls, Girl busy, ignores me or has lost interest? Yet follows me and chats with me?

[johnskog88]

I'm a guy in my late 20s. She's in her early 20s. I don't like to rate myself in looks, but I have always got girls in my younger years. She's pretty and share the same interests.

So I matched with this girl last week on Tinder. She is cute and on her profile page it says she's introvert. We have only chatted for a week. She also said finding a guy on Tinder is hard. Especially one that share the same interests as her.

We chatted a bit, mostly flirty stuff, I asked for her Snapchat and we went over there to talk, chatted there a bit, this time also flirty but also asked her about her interests. Turns out we share the same interests. She told me where she works and where she lives and stuff like that. And I tell you, finding a cute girl that shares a guy's interests is something special! We chatted a bit her interests and I asked her some questions, sometimes open-minded questions mostly from me but sometimes from her. I'm also a introvert. I don't like talking or praising myself. But when I meet someone like this, I can't hold back.

She asked for my Instagram (she's got over 1000 followers on Insta). Lets say that ever since that day she seems a bit uninterested in chatting with me. Since I'm a car and motorcycle-guy just like her, I kept up sending pictures of cars and bikes that we both like. Something's up with her now and

She hasn't removed/blocked me or anything on any of the sites. She occasionally watches my stories on Instagram but has not liked any of my pages.

Yesterday I wrote to her if everything is alright with her and what she is up to after work (haven't chatted with her for days on any platform) on Snapchat and she replied immediately with a happy text. I wrote back to her and she left me on "Delivered" on my messages on Snapchat.

Is she busy or playing hard to get? Why does she still follow me and reply me?

Updates

1 y

I'm tired of these "hard to catch"-games. Should I ask her in a good way, what my intentions with Tinder is, "to find a relationship"? It hurts not knowing what she feels.

Updates

1 y

I wrote to her yesterday on Snap. I asked her "Hey, what's up, you don't seem talkative. Has anything happened?"
She replied 1 hour later with "Hi! I've been really busy. I'm really sorry for late replying 😂. Not ment, I just have a lot to do right now :)"

[PrettyPriya]

There is no way for anyone here to know if she is busy or not. We are just guessing. If I have to guess, I would say yes. If you have had pretty steady conversation with her and then something changed, something could have come up in life that required her attention.

Just reading through the details, I can see that you place way too much importance on follows, likes and all that other social media nonsense. People who try to base someone's feelings about them on whether they forgot to click a like button will drive themselves nuts.

I think that is what has brought you here with this long story. You are overthinking this by a ton. Now, does that mean 100% for sure she didn't just lose interest? No, it doesn't. However, basing this on social media clues is not a good idea.

Give her some time to respond to you. She could be busy with work, school or even a family emergency. Don't write someone off just yet until they have a chance (and the time) to explain.

[johnskog88]

The thing is that something tells me people will many followers doesn't see when someone send them an Direct Message on Instagram. I've had that experience so many times, mostly girls. Pretty ones. I replied to a story she put up on Instagram, but she hasn't seen it or replied, or can she see it without me seeing that she has seen it? I don't know Instagram that good.

[PrettyPriya]

Sorry. I know insta probably less than you do. I can't answer about the mechanics of who sees what and when. One thing would be to exchange phone numbers and communicate through text at the very least.

It isn't like you haven't seemingly exchanged every other form of communication at this point. Yes, I know that she isn't responding at the moment. If she does, perhaps suggest chatting through text or calls. Might clear confusion.

[johnskog88]

I feel like asking for phone numbers in an early stage is creepy for her and will probably spook her off for real.

[PrettyPriya]

Really? Sounds like to me that you have every other form of communication going.

[johnskog88]

I don't know. I don't wanna spook away this catch. This is probably the most perfect and beautiful woman I have chatted with in my entire life, so I'm extremely careful on every move I do.
We spoke on Tinder first as I mentioned and when we first started chatting and I asked her where she works, turns out she works in a car part dealership/shop so she's a seller and hands with customers. I told her "How come you work there when you look like a model. I wouldn't be thinking about buying motor oil if you were standing at the counter." Implying that she's cute. This was during her work hours and she told me to "Stop, you're blushing me. That's so nice of you to say." and gave me kiss emoji back. Probably she blushed and her co-workers saw it. Then we swapped to Snapchat.

[johnskog88]

And by perfect woman I mean that she shares my interests and seems a bit naughty/lawless just like me. I ride a Harley and hang with one of the biggest biker clubs in the world. Lets say I don't always follow the rules and laws...

[PrettyPriya]

Maybe I am misjudging the level of communication you two have but it would not spook me if I were that involved. Go with your gut though.

[johnskog88]

Can't do that. I'm totally confused about her and her will/intentions.

[PrettyPriya]

Thank you kindly for the MHO 🙂

[johnskog88]

Sure. No problem!

[SueShe]

You state that you are in your late 20s yet your profile indicates that you are in your mid 30s. Could that be the problem?

If you are not honest with her from the start, then you have your reason why she got cold feet and left your messages unanswered. I mean, if you give us wrong information, what prevents you from twisting the information you give her around as well?

She may have found out when she investigated you that you are perhaps not the person you pretend to be or at least, to have hidden a number of facts about you from her.

I personally don't think she plays hard to get but let's face it. People go on those dating sites for one main reason and she could have changed her mind about you and so far, there is nothing unusual about that.

I would say that your best option is to give her some time and the distance she needs. If she does not contact you first, then you have to forget about her as she is obviously not the right person for you.

[johnskog88]

I'm almost 30 yeah. She's almost 24. Is that a big deal? I use my photos from Instagram, the ones that I had. I don't have that many pictures of myself and many pictures overall on my Instagram. But it's the same ones. Tinder shows the age of the person you swipe on and the profile you view. Which she probably has done a few times if we had a good chat on Tinder.

[sassymoon]

Your an option if I were you I would treat her as one too

[johnskog88]

I wrote to her yesterday on Snap. I asked her "Hey, what's up, you don't seem talkative. Has anything happened?"
She replied 1 hour later with "Hi! I've been really busy. I'm really sorry for late replying 😂. Not ment, I just have a lot to do right now :)"

[johnskog88]

She asked where I wanna live in the future and stuff. She even asked "when does the engagement ring come on". And we chatted a bit about that whether it should be white gold or gold.
Should I ride the storm out? She seems nice and we share the same interests. She seems a bit naughty too and I like those kind of girls. Lawless.

[Anonymous]

I stopped reading at "Tinder."

Some people never learn.

[johnskog88]

I wrote to her yesterday on Snap. I asked her "Hey, what's up, you don't seem talkative. Has anything happened?"
She replied 1 hour later with "Hi! I've been really busy. I'm really sorry for late replying 😂. Not ment, I just have a lot to do right now :)"

[johnskog88]

Can you be more explaining, please? You're sounding a bit annoyed or something.

[johnskog88]

Also why the hell does she still chat with me and follow me? Occasionally watches my stories on Instagram?

[johnskog88]

She says she's "introvert" as well.

[johnskog88]

Please explain yourself when you mean "I stopped reading at Tinder". You have no idea what we talked about or what type of conversation we had.

[Anonymous]

Something turned her off but I don't know what

[johnskog88]

Ok, but why is she still chatting with me and following me everywhere (Snapchat, Instagram, Tinder)?

[johnskog88]

Now what turned her off, if she was flirty all the way? She knows I'm hanging with 1% bikers and she accepted that. We share the same interests also.

[johnskog88]

She shares the same interests. Cars and bikes. She wants to take a license for a bike and she told me what her dream bike was.

[johnskog88]

Any ideas? She seems busy for real. She does not use social media so often it seems. She does not have Facebook unlike me for instance. I can see that her distance on Tinder has not changed for over a week. Wouldn't that change if you check Tinder anywhere?

[johnskog88]

Why is she still chatting with me, following me and not unmatching me on Tinder, if she got turned off? Maybe she is busy for real?

[Opinion Owner]

Look at how you’re blowing up my notifications. If you do this to her as well, I see why she left. You spam text and thats not cute

[johnskog88]

This is a question forum. Bit of a difference. I have not spammed her. We replied to each other's chats. Why is she still on my radar if she finds me needy (she follows me on Instagram, has not unmatched on Tinder and we're still friends on Snapchat)? I asked her yesterday: "You don't seem very talkative with a laughing smiley" in a flirty way and she replied "Hi! I've been busy all week. I'm sorry for not replying (laughing smiley)" Then a follow-up chat to me where she says: "I did not mean to be like that, it's just extremely much to do right now". She works in a car spareparts shop and delivers parts to the nearby car workshops that needs the parts. She's never online anywhere. Occasionally. When I send her a chat, she pretty much replies to it immediately. She's never rude when she replies.