Why do girls friendzone the guys that are most useful?

[Anonymous]

I gave great advice, flirted well, made them comfortable, I fixed things for them, and... friendzoned. I know the main one that crushed me was being spiteful. Effing 4 years of mixed signals. I know she wanted to marry me, but she was too stubborn about a conflict. The other girls make no sense. Like do you know what you're missing out on? Especially when the cream of the crop is that I'm very affectionate and have had no complaints so far in the bedroom.

[_Maya_]

The imfamous friendzone. You say you gave great advice, flirted well, made them feel comfortable, etc. According to whom? You? Maybe they didn't think your advice was that great or your flirting technique was weird. How do you know they had the same view as you. Did they actually say "damn you flirt so good"? You seem awfully full of yourself. Arrogance is not a turn on dude. You think you are something special. Maybe you aren't all that.

[Asker]

Hmm you're quick to judge. I bet you don't have much luck either. Maybe luck getting laid, but for sure not getting loved.

[_Maya_]

How the fuck would you know? 😆

[Asker]

It's just, you really think I'm full of myself? I can't even take a thank you very well. My advice is pretty good since I am good at observing and analyzing. Good for figuring out what kinda person someone is and learning that way instead of the hard way. Somehow, I can't learn for myself how to simplify and start small with people.

[Anonymous]

maybe they just weren't interested in you... you can do all of those things, but that doesn't guarantee they'll like you... now, mixed signals is a completely different thing than friend zoning. also, your attitude of "do you know what you're missing out on" is not very attractive...

[Asker]

So knowing what I have to offer is not attractive?

[Opinion Owner]

lol the sentence comes off as very narcissistic so yes, narcissism is very unattractive.

[Asker]

You sure you know what narcissism is? Because a narcissist wouldn't use that line. A narcissist would say something like Pfft whatever I'm so much better than you, why waste my time with trash? I am saying "I can be better for you, why not me?" Being confident in what I have to offer is not arrogant nor narcissistic. It's just being aware of what I got despite how others treat me.

[Opinion Owner]

any girl would be completely turned off after hearing "you don't know what you're missing out on". it's one of the most unattractive things to say that insures a person to be single until they change their attitude.

[msc545]

If you aren't a fuckboy or you don't have a 6 figure income, aren't at least 6 ft tall+, or don't have at least a 6 in+ penis - forget it.

Welcome to hypergamy.

[Asker]

I have 6+, 5' 10", 40k, ehh I've been told I was an 8 or 9 face/body wise as long as I shave, just my teeth are in the process of being straightened. I'm awkward tho so I kill the rizz I have sometimes, but I was also told I was surprisingly great in bed.

[msc545]

I listed the minimum requirements. 40K and 5'10" puts you in the friend zone.

[Asker]

Damn 85% of the population is screwed.

[msc545]

yes, exactly. 80-85 % of men actually. Make friends with a cute local prostitute.

[Asker]

🤣 thanks

[msc545]

Thanks for MHO

[boobliker]

I have been told they can make good money at it.

[Asker]

Yeah and they can have more than one source without getting in trouble.

[Ez-Bri-Z_v2]

Just because you do those things it doesn't make you dating material necessarily. Maybe she doesn't find you attractive. Maybe she's just looking for someone to be her friend and not as something more. Maybe you overestimate your skills.

[Asker]

I at least don't overestimate my tinkering abilities because of the results. I also don't overestimate my ability to show affection. I'm not really good at the getting out there to meet someone special part, just the communicating, and doing the small things, showing affection, and being there part after.

[Asker]

And this isn't the point. Why is everyone thinking I'm overestimating my abilities? Wtf? I am very level headed thank you. What is so bad about knowing what I have to bring to the table?

[Ez-Bri-Z_v2]

Because nobody is that objective to know exactly how others perceive them and their abilities. So for you to say you are good at it but your dating record says otherwise, just goes to reflect that there is a disconnect somewhere. Either all those girls are the problem or you are and in playing the odds I'd take my chances saying you aren't as good as you think.

[Asker]

Well I know I can at least be helpful, but maybe I just don't seem mature enough? Maybe I sell myself short and when I like someone I don't show my best side, by my sad side? Maybe I just don't get out there and the girls that come around on their own just see someone they can use without having to have sex for once?

[provokeesmokee]

You're not as useful or as "good" as you think you are.

And no amount of "usefulness" means you're owed a relationship.

[Asker]

Hmm. I know what I am because I face the bad and the good in me all the time. I try to have an objective view of myself. No it does not mean I'm owed one, but I also don't deserve to be messed with. Because I don't want to waste my valuable time chasing her when I could be working on myself more and finding someone who actually values me.

[REX_JSWL]

They keep us as a backup plan
Like plan B

[barn_stormer]

stop doing shit for girls. make them chase you

[barn_stormer]

have you read anything on Game or PUA?

[Asker]

No. Maybe I bombard them. I can be a hot mess.

[barn_stormer]

read up on it

[In_Trance]

Because they don't like them