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Holiday Contest! Caption this Picture with your Funniest Line! (Page 4)
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What Girls & Guys Said
Grandpa : Happy birthday! *Sighs* hmm... I've notice you been only eating orange foods lately.
Grandma: mhm...
Grandpa: Not this again... last time you ate all of the orange fish out of the fish bowl.
Grandma: mhm...*Looks at cat*
Grandpa: *Looks at cat*
Cat: *Eyes get big*
Grandpa: Cats are not food!
Grandma: *Licks lips*
Grandpa: Ohhh sweet baby jessus... Welp there goes my appetite... No cake for me.
Grandma: *Loudly burps*
"Wherever you go or wherever you may be, always let your wind go free"
He is letting out a silent and deadly fart and wondering when they'll notice.
Guy- "What's a girl like you doing in a place like this?"
Girl- "I've been asking myself that same question for fifty years!"
(Inspired by my 90-year-old neighbor's.)
My Viagra just kicked in, going to be the best New Years ever!
Grandpa: *Farts loudly*
Cat: O. O
Grandma: *Drops orange slice*
Grandpa: Oh dear god... not again.
"I hope she don't eat the ring I put in the orange."
"Who is this lady and how did she get in my house? Present from the cat?
Well, happy Christmas to you too then."
... Don't look at me like that. I'm kissing the cat at midnight.
[look at how scared the cat looks]
It's New Years now but guess what I got for Christmas? Let's just say "Hoe, Hoe, Hoe!" Merry Christmas to me! 😉
I hope that cat isn't the only pussy I get his Christmas!
ha! that picture had your comment coming to it
She's giving me that look again😳
But why?
I got her her favorite food...
I got those slippers she wanted...
I've been so good to her all day.
Oh well. I wonder what's for dinner?
"Just for the record, this is my party not yours, so pass me the food! And I'm really going to win this staring contest!"
The cat is thinking:
"Ahh, why do I have to be in the middle of this? Bah Humbug!"
😝
"We have eyebags on our eyebags... this is why i love you"
Are you planning to share that orange with me? My stomach is kind of empty.
"I thought you said you are allergic to oranges in one of your GAG messages to me last year."
Lol at the downvotes :-P
"I wonder if this old bat would be for a little coitus under the Christmas tree "
When I asked Santa for pussy I didn't expect him to give me a cat!
Husband: I want some pussy
Wife: Oh darling, look what I got you!
Cat: Meow
Husband: This wasn't the pussy I wanted :\ Santa and I need words!
The only reason I'd ever get a sex change operation is to see what it's like to be right all the time.
Should I ask her out.
I've known this girl for 74 years, we live together and have 5 kids and a cat! Should I ask her out?
I believe the kids call it Snapchat not Snack chat but oh well, I hope she does not realize that I replaced the cat today after it died from eating one of those snacks.