What you girls say vs. what guys hear?

[Jackblue]

Please understand I am not saying this is true of all guys just a good many of us. I am also not saying that girls should change what they say, if anything guys should change their perceptions.

What you said: Not tonight dear, I just don't feel like it.
What he hears: I am so sick of you, you have lost any of the charm you had when I married you, I am only staying with you because divorce would reflect badly on me. If I ever do have sex with you again I will hate every moment of it.

What you said: Am I getting fat.
What he hears: I want you to look carefully and tell me if I have gotten even slightly fatter even if the difference is so minor that nobody will ever notice, and I want your completely honest opinion.

What you said: Hi (with a smile on your face)
What he hears: I totally like you even though we don't see each other much and don't really know each other please ask me out.

What you said: Your penis is too big it is making me uncomfortable.
What he hears: Ooh I am so unworthy of you, you manly stud.

What you said: It's fine (with a frown on your face)
What he hears: It's totally fine.

What you said: She is pretty.
What he hears: I am totally thinking about a threesome with you me and her.

[Cookies_AndMilk]

From all the girls I've met, this is what I've found most of them mean:

Not tonight dear, I just don't feel like it = I just don't feel like it

Am I getting fat? = Tell me how much you love me/give me compliments and kisses

Hi = Hi

Your penis is too big it's making me uncomfortable = ? I'm not sure about this one, I don't talk to other people about their sex lives but maybe she's telling the truth.

It's fine = It's not fine, it's never fine, talk to me about it xD

She is pretty = I think she's prettier than me and I want you to say she's unattractive and I'm gorgeous.

[SuitAndTie]

So needy 😛

[Cookies_AndMilk]

@SuitAndTie Yes, yes it is! :D

[Mesonfielde]

You say 'it's fine" when you don't want to discuss it, why would I pry further

[Cookies_AndMilk]

@Mesonfielde I think most guys feel that way but maybe the reasoning behind is to be romanced. If she's upset she's probably feeling a little down and if you show interest and pry further it shows her you really care. I know that doesn't entirely make sense but it's an explanation. lol.

[ThisDudeHere]

Here's how I see it:
"What you said: Not tonight dear, I just don't feel like it."
And so the 'fun' part of marriage begins...

"Am I getting fat."
The only answers I can give is no and yes and neither of them will work.

"Hi."
Hello.

"Your penis is too big it is making me uncomfortable."
Bullshit. She's hiding something.

"It's fine."
Absolutely nothing is fine. But I don't give a damn. If she can't tell me what's the problem, I'm not going to care.

"She is pretty."
Yup... she is [what is she getting at?]

[Tanuron]

I dont even think the majority or even many is really this.. how to even put it.. crazy, lol. My take on all of this.

"What you said: Not tonight dear, I just don't feel like it. "
What I hear, is exactly that. "Not tonight dear, I just dont feel like it". This statement is true for all of them, I dont hear other words that is not being said, but I do think from this one. "Are you okay?, Is something on your mind?, are you feeling sick?". And thus might give hugs and kisses to make sure she is okay or just offer an ear to listen if there is anything and just respect what she said.

"What you said: Am I getting fat. "
What Im thinking.. "Whaaat?, you are not fat at all!!" "You look very sexy". Which is probably what I would say. "You look sexy/ You look beautiful" Maybe adding"no worries" to it.

"What you said: Hi (with a smile on your face) "
I think and say Hi with a smilie face back. Why does hi have to mean anymore than a hi? If people think as such just from such a simple word, they are over analyzing, even if people have ulterior motive for contacting you, you are still over analyzing.

"What you said: Your penis is too big it is making me uncomfortable. "
What I think "Well at least its not too small", lolz. But more importandly, I would try to make it more comfy in that case, naturally.

"What you said: It's fine (with a frown on your face) "
You got to be pretty braindead or clueless to not know fine is fine in cases like that. What I might think, if I have failed to just communicate and talk about whatever is bugging her (even tho in cases like that where people use the word fine it can be pretty obvious what bothers them) but sometimes they just dont wanna talk about things either which I might think if it dosent help or are able to simply talk about it. In that case she can come to me when she is ready.

"What you said: She is pretty. "
What I think, "Not as pretty as you".

[93stepsawayfromhome]

I'd say this take is bullshit, but it's probably very real for some percentage of men. Anyway though:

"I am so sick of you, you have lost any of the charm you had when I married you, I am only staying with you because divorce would reflect badly on me. If I ever do have sex with you again I will hate every moment of it."

Oh so if a girl doesn't feel like having sex on one single fucking evening, she's sick of you?

"I want you to look carefully and tell me if I have gotten even slightly fatter even if the difference is so minor that nobody will ever notice, and I want your completely honest opinion."

Just say no if it's not noticeable, how hard is that?

"I totally like you even though we don't see each other much and don't really know each other please ask me out."

Anyone who thinks that is just dumb.

"Ooh I am so unworthy of you, you manly stud."

If she says that it makes her uncomfortable, HOW IS THAT EVEN A POSSIBLE INTERPRETATION?

"It's totally fine."

I'm bad at noticing facial expressions, but if you frown when saying "it's fine", I'll notice it, and no, it's not fine.

"I am totally thinking about a threesome with you me and her."

Doing all the clichés today are you? Holy shit. Thinking someone is pretty doesn't make you want a threesome. For a heterosexual male an FFM might be an exciting fantasy, but why would a heterosexual female want sex with another woman? And even if she's bisexual, just saying somebody is pretty doesn't immediately equal wanting to have sex with them.

[Anonymous]

My take on your take

1. I feel so sick/tired/angry/bummed out that I may vomit/fall asleep/bite down/cry on your fuck if we try to have sex.

2. I know I'm getting fat, please say something nice.

3. I'm so awkward. I guess I'll just smile aimlessly and look pleasant.

4. Holy hell!! My cervix!!! Stop impaling me, please!

5. I'm not sure how I feel right now. Let's leave it be for a while and maybe I'll forget it or maybe I'll bring it up later.

5. I get it, she's hot. So is that guy with the bulging biceps. Let's just move on, ok?

[Opinion Owner]

Hahaha! Dunno why dick autocorrected to fuck on #1, but I guess it still works ;)

[9mfeo]

If men actually think that "not tonight" means "I hate you and never want to have sex with you ever again" then they are bigger, whinier pissbabies than even I dver imagined.

[OnceUponADream143]

Lol yep

[9mfeo]

@OnceUponADream143 like maybe she has gas. Maybe she has something to do in the morning. Maybe she really just doesn't feel like it. It's not an automatic "i hate you go die now" situation.

[OnceUponADream143]

Exactly.

[0112358]

While he's exaggerating somewhat, it's not totally inaccurate, so basically, assume men are bigger pissbabies than you ever imagined.

We also intellectually know it's not the case, and try to accept it, but how do we feel when rejected? Totally rejected as a man. (Assuming she's not unusually sick/tired, etc). I mean occasionally saying 'not tonight' and then initiating the next day herself is one thing, but frequent not in the mood -feels- like 'you're simply a helpful non-human object who i keep around for entertainment/to run errands'

[9mfeo]

@0112358 work on your own insecurities first, bro.

[0112358]

I have. But that changes more how I handle my feelings, not what my initial, instinctive feeling is.

[9mfeo]

@0112358 then you haven't really worked on your insecurities, have you?

[Prettygurl12]

Here's one from my boyfriend like 4 years before we started dating. Keep in mind he was taken at this time... also, he was 13 so his relationship wasn't very serious but still. Taken. lmao

Him: I like you.
Me: Don't you have a girlfriend you should be saying that to?
What he heard: I hate you and you are the scum of the earth; how dare you talk to me - go die.

[jjmarvin]

Lol ok i dint agree with really any in the actual take but this one is legit for the teen years, even adulthood for some :p

[Babyapple]

It's more like
She says: hi/it's raining/oh/the suitcase is blue
He hears: did she just say sex?
😜

[WhatTheHellAmy]

"Your penis is too big, it is making me uncomfortable".

- Said no woman ever XD

[Jackblue]

I have heard plenty of women say that online.

[Jackblue]

I am sure women say that to Jonah Falcon and Roberto Esquivel Cabrera (who lives alone by the way)

[WhatTheHellAmy]

I was kidding lol

[LittleSally]

That dude in the pic is adorable. =)

As for the 'Hi' thing... then why aren't guys asking women out more? Hahaha xD
Some of it doesn't make sense... some of it was quite clear.

[ceative__very]

the girl is way more adorable

[LittleSally]

@ceative__very The girl looks like a dude. o. O

[ceative__very]

umm.. i still like her #nohomo

[Anonymous]

I want to stay anon so to answer Little S: because "hi" does not mean that to most guys; to most guys it means absolutely nothing at all. Until she is at the point of forcibly wanting to french kiss me, I read nothing into that sort of thing whatsoever.

[AleDeEurope]

This is so stupid that it's hilarious xD You seriously think "Not tonight" means that? Oh god, you're gonna have a shitty marriage XD

[RachelBrigs]

if You actually interpret any of those statements that way there's something wrong with you

[Tomsta]

"I just came out of relationship and i'm not ready to date yet"
What he hears: "I don't want to date YOU"

^ That one really annoys me, if you don't want to date us, just say it and don't play the "just got of a relationship" card

[OnceUponADream143]

Well actually, they migth just not be ready fro a relationship. They could of been hurt badly and afriad of getting hurt again.

[Tomsta]

@OnceUponADream143 Then why go on a date with someone...

Yes this happened to me and yes i'm still hung up on her

[OnceUponADream143]

Oh she went on a date with someone? Then it could of been she didn't want to date you beacuse I doubt if someone really wasn't ready to date someone, that they would date someone. If she says that to everyone and avoids dates, then she isn't ready.

[Tomsta]

@OnceUponADream143 Yeah it was me, and yeah hence my annoyance at the line

[Bandit74]

What you said: Your penis is too big it is making me uncomfortable.
What he hears: Ooh I am so unworthy of you, you manly stud.

lmfao, that was definitely the best part of this take 😂

[HarmoniChaos]

First thing I imagined when seeing the tittle. Old Cartoons for children. Where boys and girls had entirely different languages and needed a fancy gimmicky Boy to Girl translator device.

[gapminder]

I hear this 99% of the time.

https://youtu.be/rRh6rLVl2U4

[lilac_flowers]

I am too fond of South Park to get butthurt about this. xD

[gapminder]

@lilac_flowers I love it too!!!

[Nik1hil]

What girls say
What boys hear
And please add this category to
WHAT GIRLS MEAN (it's really confusing)

[ConsultantIsBack]

Guys: Dude, clean the damn dishes you slob (very direct, crude)
Girls: Heyyy honey, those dishes look kinda dirty (subtle, hinting at what she wants)

[jjfrancis]

they try to be so nice about it. honestly i prefer the "fuck sake, clean the dishes" than beating the bush around. hbu?

[ConsultantIsBack]

@jjfrancis well if you ask me the best way to say it it would probably be "hey babe, clean the dishes and I'll make it worthwhile WINK WINK" lmao

[jjfrancis]

yeah but your more likely to get struck by lightning than having that happen more than twice :P

[ConsultantIsBack]

@jjfrancis haha. yeah, i need to find a girlfriend that absolutely hates doing dishes.

[jjfrancis]

hahaha now your thinking! :P having a little leverage is one of the best things in a relationship :P

[Anonymous]

My girl friend claims that I don't really listen to her... or at least I think that's what she said.

[Anonymous]

So when a girl says hi guys automatically assume she likes them?
lol um ok

[Dipsy]

With a smile! Don't forget the smile!

[Opinion Owner]

So friendliness= attraction?

[jjfrancis]

in a nutshell, yes :P woman aren't as obvious as us when they flirt so we will take everything as flirting until we get to know you hahaha

[Opinion Owner]

Lol interesting
I've heard it's the opposite with shy guys. Like its hard for them to realize you actually like them?
I don't know just what I've heard

[Northeast106]

That's true. Cocky guys think every girl wants them, shy guys think no woman wants them. They downplay everything as her just being friendly, or just doing her job or something. Some guys are in a healthy balance between the two. Not too cocky, and not too shy.

[Anonymous]

hahaha lollll!! the she is pretty one and the hi one i have experienced and realised this