My boyfriend and I broke up a few days ago after a year and a little over 8 months together. We were so in love, and extremely happy together, and were very comfortable around each other's family and friends. In the fall of last year, when I was a junior and he was a senior in high school, we talked about him leaving for college and I told him I thought it would make the most sense for us to break up before he left. At the time, he was very upset that I would suggest that, but as time went by, he decided I was right.
So all this summer, we spent as much time together as possible, up until our very last day together. Our feelings hadn't changed at all; we were still so in love. But we stuck to our original plan nonetheless. He's a very social guy, and he's going to a big city school, so I knew all along that trying to uphold a long distance relationship wouldn't work for us. I would get too worried and jealous and it would just end badly. I thought ending on such a positive note would be a lot better, but it's been the hardest thing I've ever done. On our last day together, all we could do was cry. We couldn't even be together for longer than a couple hours because we'd just look at each other and cry. We could hardly even kiss. He drove away and I just collapsed in a heap and cried for basically the rest of the day. I've been trying to distract myself but so much of my life was focused around him and now he's six hours away. During our entire relationship, we ALWAYS had a Facebook message going as a way to check in with each other. We lived about five minutes apart, so we could see each other all the time. We were friends first too, which made our relationship even stronger. I told him that I thought it'd be best if we went awhile with no contact. We're still friends on Facebook, but we have no messages going and we don't talk on Facebook chat. It's incredibly weird, because we both have albums of pictures of us together and comments from each other on them, and a wall-to-wall that covers our relationship from friends up until our last week together. So many things that I have were acquired with him or from him or just while we were together. I'm rambling, I know, but it's just so hard. Anyway the point is that I told him no contact is the way to go, and he said "sure, whatever you want is fine with me, I just want you to be happy." But honestly, I don't want to be the one who does the contacting first, if at all. I don't like the idea of being the one who has to initiate it, like I'm weaker or something. I know he's the guy but still, he was just as upset as I was when he had to go! Do you think that he's just saying that because he wants to appear stronger? Does he REALLY not care if we talk again or not? I can't figure this out.
So all this summer, we spent as much time together as possible, up until our very last day together. Our feelings hadn't changed at all; we were still so in love. But we stuck to our original plan nonetheless. He's a very social guy, and he's going to a big city school, so I knew all along that trying to uphold a long distance relationship wouldn't work for us. I would get too worried and jealous and it would just end badly. I thought ending on such a positive note would be a lot better, but it's been the hardest thing I've ever done. On our last day together, all we could do was cry. We couldn't even be together for longer than a couple hours because we'd just look at each other and cry. We could hardly even kiss. He drove away and I just collapsed in a heap and cried for basically the rest of the day. I've been trying to distract myself but so much of my life was focused around him and now he's six hours away. During our entire relationship, we ALWAYS had a Facebook message going as a way to check in with each other. We lived about five minutes apart, so we could see each other all the time. We were friends first too, which made our relationship even stronger. I told him that I thought it'd be best if we went awhile with no contact. We're still friends on Facebook, but we have no messages going and we don't talk on Facebook chat. It's incredibly weird, because we both have albums of pictures of us together and comments from each other on them, and a wall-to-wall that covers our relationship from friends up until our last week together. So many things that I have were acquired with him or from him or just while we were together. I'm rambling, I know, but it's just so hard. Anyway the point is that I told him no contact is the way to go, and he said "sure, whatever you want is fine with me, I just want you to be happy." But honestly, I don't want to be the one who does the contacting first, if at all. I don't like the idea of being the one who has to initiate it, like I'm weaker or something. I know he's the guy but still, he was just as upset as I was when he had to go! Do you think that he's just saying that because he wants to appear stronger? Does he REALLY not care if we talk again or not? I can't figure this out.
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