likei tried breaking things off but he argued me back to pull me back in but constantly says he doesn't want to lead me on i think he is a narc , and i have been loved bombed for past 2 years we aren't even in a relationship but one day he wants to break it off but when i agree he gets mad
Sounds like he's screwing around with your affections.
I recognise the situation, it means you've had too many fights over time and he's wondering if he should leave the relationship but still feels love for you.
there's two possiblities:
1) He will realise his love is stronger than the fights you've had and make up with you and regret saying or speaking of leaving
2) You will fight again, before he's recovered and he will try to break up with you and succeed.
I can't say I know which outcome is ever best. The way I figured it out to get my ex-gf was living together with her for 3 years of relative hell until I realised we where in a bad cycle of fights and make up sex. Realised I couldn't honestly say I didn't love her (then) and decided to lie to her and say I realised I never really loved her (because I saw that as the only way to break the bad cycle). I feel it was the right choice, but I disliked having to lie to her. I explained later that it was a lie that spoke to a greater truth. I'm glad, she's now with a new boyfriend and I'm happy with that because he truly loves her and in a way I would never be able to sustain against how she is. This might speak more to my own personal weaknesses than right or wrong.
So, yeah. Work out if your in some predictable cycle like I found myself, give it the time that your love/relationship deserves to figure out where your at. Then, if you have to, lie to end a bad cycle (hate to give that as advice, because lying is never right... unless, like I say, it speaks to a greater truth, meaning there is loving someone, and there is 'being good for someone' and if you love them but KNOW your bad for them, for whatever reason. Its fair to say you don't love them when you still do. in my opinion.
Seen that more than once. I dont know about narcissistic with just the above. Id say broken hearted child that saw relational stress and divorce… his viee of love is division from examples he saw or he was abused emotionally bynothers such that his self worth is low. So when comes to ‘being the man’… he's confused… can't go fwd… but hurts to leave. Probably has trouble making decisions.
Now if he had no dad and mom was weak to his power… he learned to use chicks and dis nit get disciplined then yes, may be narc. That be more ‘self loathing’ feel where hed intentionally go fing with you and hurt you. I dont sense that… but maybe… kinda can look the same.
Seek help because you are in trouble. It ain't that hard to figure out. If need kore lmk. Getting iut if the fix can be some work cause that is ‘you’ stuff.
Could be he is just keeping you an option until he finds something better or he could be scared to commit. You never really know with guys that fuck around like this, but if he isn't willing to commit after 2 years he doesn't really love you because most men would want to lock you down if they had any fear of losing you but clearly he doesn't.
Huge red flag. He doesn’t want you but he doesn’t want anyone else to have you either. He wants to keep you on a leash just in case he can’t find another victim. He keeps you around, entertain you a little bit until he gets bored. Run away, change your name and just forget this guy! He doesn’t want you at all!
Opinion
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Ηe is manipulative, toxic and he thinks he has got you wrapped around his finger.
u This is some low level manipulation he wants to keep u around but make it seems like u are not a option when that's all u are
Lol, he just told on himself. He is a narcissist and he is trying to keep you when you are drawing a boundary.
Leave.
There is a simple solution for that, if you feel that this relationship can't work you should break it off, even if he feels mad about it, you can move on from that.
But just break it off with him by telling him not by radio silence or ghosting, it doesn't work I have tried.
Means he’s a fool and thinking with his head… not his actual head.
Cut him off and don’t waste your time. I’ve wasted years on guys like that and I regret it. They won’t change and they definitely won’t change for you.
I've known a few guys who pull stuff like that. I don't think it's a narcissism thing though, because the guy is being very honest about what he can't give you.
The guy enjoys doting on you, but he doesn't want a relationship with you. I would think a narcissist would try to be your everything.
That sounds exactly like he's leading you on but keeping you to the side as his back up. Run from that shit, you don't need it and anything good from a guy like that won't last
He’s just wasting your time and using you for his own needs. When he get better option he will eventually leave. Been there. Trust me. When the guy said he wasn’t ready believe him and just run
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Cut ties for him. He's going to drag it out forever as he won't himself. Thet would drive me crazy.
Seems to me he is playing games keeping you where he wants to. Mixed signal and messages , I’m surprised you can tolerate that
Ew lol he’s leading you on to hold on for bare minimum
Sounds like he's immature and doesn't really know what he wants
He doesn't want to commit but still wants to keep you around probably just for sex
He is immature and will string you along
It means he is using you for his need, does not care about yours. He is also telling you this in code so he can do so without feeling guilty.
He likes you but not enough to commit because he has options
Sure seems as if No one understands others now days.
that's toxic , and he's playing games , just leave
Nah don’t waste your time ! Keep that guy as a friend or just move on. Trust what a guys says there is no hidden meaning to it
mean u needa cut him
a little slack
if u want him coming back
😉👉
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