Office crush giving me mixed signals?

[NXTMD]

So i met this guy at work place situation. From day 1 i knew there was some kind of energy between us. He would stare at me , we would have lot of eye contact. He would pass by me so many times while i was there. Like he literally made it known that he was around me. We didn't talk in begining since other coworkers being around us. But one day we ended up in lunch room alone and strated talking, pretty much knowing about our lives and future stuff. He would always try to impress me about his future plans, he would talk about his family and so on. I am thinking he is shy. He would always talk to me when we are alone but when we are around others , he won't talk. Also, when he comes to work he doesn't say "hello" to everyone but me. I have even noticed that he doesn't talk a lot to any of co workers.

Fast forword, one day i was asked to work under him. We were alone in room so we started talking, just getting to know each other more. But then i noticed that he was getting distracted so i made excuse to leave but he kept me there by saying that he needed my help. Then when i was about to leave he said he can't get anything done.

So i guess he was telling me that i was distracting him? I think i tottaly annoyed this guy and lost my chances. Now when i see him yes he would say hi but nothing else. He no longer stares at me, when i would ask him if he needs any help he would say just no. I guess he just want to avoid being distracted or something. I understand work place romance is never good idea. And i feel like this guy has realized that so he doesn't want to go with it? I tottaly thought we both can have something special and wanted to take it slow but now he is acting like this... I feel like to stop going to work because i like this guy and wanted to ask him out. But this guy doesn't seem much in for it.

by the way we work in healthcare so its pretty stressfull work environment. What do you guys think?

[AthleticMom]

Paragraph 1
His obvious goal is to get closer to you and he cares little for any other coworker

Paragraph 2
Distractions are left vague, no mention of phone ringing, etc. so agree it must be you making him tongue tied and thoughts jumbled between intimacy goals & work team goals. It's obvious he arranged for this help in the background, then screwed it up... unless you kept getting the work train off track with tangent quips?

Paragraph 3
Alas, he feels defeated and now ashamed of this last failed opportunity to get closer to you. With so few social skills, not to mention gal skills, he won't feel happy about addressing you, now the distant wish goal, until someday he arrives at another plan. Since he feels you will be swooped up by others prior to this eureka, he's in the dumps and prefers to bury his failures.
Asking if he needs helps is a stick in this wound, hopefully he doesn't think this having fun at his expense.

Quitting this job would be immature and foil everyone's goal, as I assume you would go out with him if asked... for your writing. Since opposites attract & I am reading both are shy people, this may never work BUT if YOU could muster up enough gusto to ask him out for coffee, dinner, I-have-to-go-to-this-but-need-a-date-thing, etc. You might well have solved the problem of ice breaking once & for all ala priming the pump.

by the way a lot of jobs are stressful

[NXTMD]

Actually, i am very out going and not shy at all. but i am bit hesitant to pursue any guy at work place thinking about future consequnces. I barely started this job 2 months ago. But thank you for detailed response. I think that he is being cautioned from that day experience but i may be wrong. In fact, yesterday we happened to be at work same time. As usual he greeted me to make it known he came to work area. I was pretty busy working in different areas but i notice him going around (may be trying to look for me?) Toward end of shift he was working with other co worker. I wanted to avoid asking him anything so i asked that other co worker if they need any help. So he told that other co worker that i should wait for him. He specially came outside to say that he doesn't need any help and thank me for asking. Wow, he could have just send this message through that co worker but he personally came out to tell me lol

[AthleticMom]

so what's your next move to get to know him better, since he's into you but doesn't have a clue how to move closer, other than speaking to you personally/professionally?

[NXTMD]

I actually have no idea what to do next to be honest. I mean i can make move but i am scared for my job. What do you think i should do? I guess i will just take it slow and see what happens. Also, i don't know if this info will help but he is from Europe, very traditional and manly man. He always has serious face on when he is working. When we talk, he opens up he smiles. All these qualities attracted me. And as a woman i want him to take lead in this and i am sure he can do that. Also, he seems like not very experienced with women or may be he is just shy guy. At the same time i do try to give him signals about my interest but i keep it neutral since i don't want to go over board just in case he is not into me that way.

[AthleticMom]

Hey Europe, thanks for walking with me, love that smile of yours
a) I was going to try a new recipe this week but need a guinea pig to give an honest report on it. If you'll come over to judge, you'll get a nice dinner, TV movie, conversation and even name what night is best for you
b) There's a place I heard about recently, am dying to go but not alone, not with gal friends, so I need you to say YES and when you can go with me. Is that against the rules?
c) I have something that's broken and no one seems to know how to fix it (go break something!). I remember you said once that you were a whiz at fixing such things. Could you come over one night at look at it, bring some tools? I'll cook or order a pizza to make it fun?
d) I need a ride home tonight... once in the car... could we stop for just a moment at this bistro on the way? Always wanted to try it but never all alone.

I'm working hard here... please don't say "have no guts"

[soltyrei]

I am in the same boat my crush is doing that to me too

[Anonymous]

Ask him out girl!