I think guys have less emotional intelligence, but that has little to do with guys not wanting female friends.
Guys - especially younger guys - just aren't nearly as interested in relationships as they are with getting sex. Women vastly underestimate the male desire for sex - including and often specifically casual sex - because women don't lack for those opportunities at all and aren't very interested in them anyway. Guys want to bang EVERY girl he finds physically attractive unless something else really powerful disqualifies her - like dating his best friend.
And most women are NOT easy to be friends with. All but a few of the female friends I've ever had have been incredibly needy, emotionally over-sensitive, far too caught up in other people's lives (and wanting me to get involved too), and are rarely relaxing to be around.
Male friends, on the other hand, are easy, and have very few exceptions and are almost never offended or upset.
Without the possibility of sex to offset the hassle and time costs, most guys do the math and decide that being friends with girls isn't worth it.
Obviously there are exceptions - I've had a few female friends who were awesome and easy to be friends with - but that isn't the norm.
I have several female friends and I do have to admit, the amount of time and mental investment is almost as much as my girlfriend. Male friends are so much more laid back.
Both genders of friends have their pros and cons in the end.
Plenty of guys have the emotional intelligence to have platonic female friends. It is simply that most people in general are asshats. So girls having a lack of emotional intelligence will say things that are glaringly misleading, and guys who lack emotional intelligence will take random things as a sign a girl likes them without any reasoning which girls also do (which you can easily tell from some of the questions by girls on here) it is just that your obviously going to notice the guys who behave that way more, because they are the ones who have the more extreme reactions, obviously you will remember them more clearly than the guy who just said hi and had a very casual conversation and acted normally.
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Anonymous
(25-29)
+1 y
Of course guys are emotionally capable! Just like with any other friend who shares the same interest... guy or girl. If you talk a lot about common interests... that’s just how it goes. Guys aren’t wild predators that lack emotion. They know what they are doing to themselves if they know the girl isn’t interested. They move on, a new more exciting girl who makes them a special kind of happy comes along and it’s becomes less of an issue. More like an appreciation of the friendship.
I mean... I can stare at a beautiful woman and appreciate her in a sexually degrading way internally but no sound person is actually going to do anything about it without her consent and returned interest. I can still be interested in being a friend to her if she is my friend type too. But like.., let’s be honest... that’s rare
Well from what I heard, from other men that is, is that most men don't search for platonic relationships with women cause they don't value that kind of relationship with a woman. They don't want to be seen as one of her "girl". Most men want a romantic or sexual relationship with a woman, and some cases they will stick around as a friend hoping you'll change your mind about them and see them as a potential partner. Now that's not saying men and women can't be friends, they can but there has to be zero and I mean zero attraction on both sides. Cause from the question I answered on here, guys who have a close girl as a friend have secret feelings for her and would jump at the chance at being her boyfriend.
Disagree: I have three women, that I consider platonic friends. We get along well, and all understand, without saying a word, that there can be nothing more than friendship, or the friendship has to end. But it's not like there is some almost tangible attraction among us, etc., that we have to avoid. We are simply friends. We each have our own personal boundaries, which are similar enough, that our friendships work.
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Anonymous
(36-45)
+1 y
Well, that's awfully rude, and incredibly inaccurate.
Most of the guys I know, myself included, have plenty of platonic female friends, and it's never been anything more than just friendship.
Maybe you need to hang around grown men, rather than horny teenage boys.
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Anonymous
(45 Plus)
+1 y
The only males that have a problem with it are the ones generally bad with women. They develop friendships like investments thinking they can eventually be romantic relationships.
Guys that don't have problems with women can easily have strictly platonic relationships with women as they have no problems finding romantic relationships the proper way.
Perhaps you used the wrong wording. For the most part I can't be friends with a woman I'm attracted to unless I'm in a happy relationship. It's easier for me currently to be friends with an attractive woman because I'm not even remotely looking for someone, and stressed from moving.
Guys are capable of platonic friendships with women. It just depends on the guy. If you constantly start friendships/conversations with guys that hookup all the time and act like fuckboys, its not gonna happen. But sometimes people catch feelings too.
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Anonymous
(18-24)
+1 y
In my experience, guys can make pretty great friends and do have emotional intelligence. My best friend is a guy and he has never viewed me in a romantic way. This also isn’t a childhood friend situation by the way, I met him in high school. Most of my good guy friends also view me only platonically and have never pursued me (however the ones who do develop feelings take the rejection well and continue to be friends with me and support me in my pursuit of other guys). Also, my guy friends communicate their feelings much better than my girl friends. They also have been more supportive of me in tough times (note: I’m not saying female friends aren’t as good this is just my experience). A lot of my female friends also have had similar positive experiences with guys they befriend. So personally I believe guys are capable of having healthy platonic relationships with girls based on my experiences. I may just be lucky though.
emotional intelligence is not a form of intelligence. Emotional experience is a better way to put it. No the reason why men struggle to make platonic friends is ancestral. Mens job in ancient times was to reproduce, this is still prevalent today. All though we can suppress this primal urge it's a lot harder than most women think.
Disagree, has nothing to do with intelligence. It has everything to do with self control, perception and awareness of the situation.. if they are, then they will understand... women have to also understand that they have to help by continuing to remind where the line is. But if you don’t, don’t complain
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Anonymous
(25-29)
+1 y
Depends, to begin with I don't want/need female friends, it'd cause problems in future relationships causing jealousy. I don't need to deal with that and I don't really care about having female friends to begin with. If I get a girlfriend/wife that's all the female interaction I need. So in my case it's not about not having emotional intelligence as you put it, but because it's too tedious and complicated.
I agree with the picture so I voted yes. I also agree with the statement in general. But personally? Two of my closest friends are female, although one is a lesbian so that makes things a lot easier. But still.
Guess I gotta delete this template now, fck sakes. Also disagree. If the guys around you seem to be unable to be friends alone, then they're idiots and sucks for you I guess.
I wouldn't say its inteligence... I have lots of female friends and men are just more straight forward and some can't deal with the utter bullshit girls do like emotional drama etc... it's not inteligence its just annoying... also men feel emotions a different way so don't think that boys are just less developed than girls even tho we have a different system that obv this question seems to be ignoring
You haven't met older men and more men with maturity. Platonic female friends are so much better. I don't have them cuz they dissapoint me a lot. But yes, men do have them.
Nope, I have some awesome guy friends as a testament to that statement being false. We've had profound conversations about life and such and we value eachother's opinions.
my best friend is a woman, she has been for 30+ years. i have several other women, who are my friends, and just that. I will never cross that line with them.
I have platonic guy friendships with zero romance/sex because of multiple reasons. Honestly it's great having guy friends but the ones that are just being my friend to get into my pants piss me off.
I have enough emotional intelligence to have female friends. I just also have enough penile intelligence to want to hump them if they have sex appeal. I don't see emotional intelligence had to do with whether or not a guy can have platonic female friends. It has a lot more to do with how much the guy wants to hump the girl. Contrary to popular opinion emotional intelligence and sexual attraction are not mutually exclusive things
Who says? Like us guys can have platonic female friends while in a relationship. Me and my girlfriend are friends with another couple. I'm pretty sure its a platonic relationship xD
It's not intelligence that's the problem, it's physical urges and the fact that we're visual. Something I don't think you women fully understand. You'd have to be a guy to know what it's like.
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