Do girls like guys to hold open doors or not?

Question

Lately when I hold open a door for a girl I don't even get a thank you. And when a guy is behind me I usually do. One girl told my friend that it is sexist to hold a door open for a girl so I stopped doing it. But the other day when I didn't hold it this girl goes thanks a lot in a sarcastic voice. Well at least it was a thank you. So do you ladies like this or not cause it seems like you get angry at us when we hold it and you get angry when we don't.

sage-of-caring · Accepted Answer

bro I understand. when I was in high school and the class (or sometimes the whole school) would go to a meeting or fire drill or something like that I would be the only guy holding the door open for everyone. one time there was a fire drill and I held the door open for the entire school, that's a class size of 800+ people. and I only got 28 "thank you"'s and 18 of them were from guys.

I remember there was this girl who left for lunch out of the same door I did and every time I held the door open for her (I do it for everyone really), and she never so much as gave me a glance. Then one day she went to lunch with a friend and I held the door open for both of them and her friend looked me in the eye and gave me a big smile and thanked me (she was a head of the other girl). as I followed them I heard her whisper to her friend something like; don't thank him he's probably just trying to get in your pants. this hurt my feelings but I still held the door open for her even though she thought I was being overly nice. some time after that incident I was holding the door for her and she said with the most hateful look "your just wasting your time I'm on to your scheme." I smiled and just said there's no scheme I just like to be polite especially to a pretty young girl, she then just stormed off and never said another word to me again.

we don't hold the door open to be thanked and we don't do it to be sexist. people who think we do it to be sexist don't really think that they think we do it with a alter motive but we just to it to be polite. there are very few true gentlemen left in this world and people are often thrown off by meeting one and most don't believe we even exist anymore but my intentions as I suspect your are, are always pure. so I'm going to keep holding doors open even if nobody thanks me even if the ladies do think I do it with the intentions of getting sex.

I HOLD DOORS OPEN 'CAUSE ITS THE RIGHT THING TO DO!

pwl0lwp · Accepted Answer

damned if you do, damned if you don't - sounds about normal for the modern guy dealing with the modern girl :P

holding a door open for someone behind you (male or female) is just good manners (assuming otherwise it would slam in their face :P)

holding the door open & let someone go through first is even more polite, but it doesn't have to be chauvinistic.

in the same lines, not saying "thankyou" to someone who holds the door for you is just plain rude.

lets face it - some people are just jerks :P

jemma · Accepted Answer

I would say you are way over thinking this. But I suggest you keep holding doors for people, male or female, whenever you can, it can nevrer hurt to be a nice person, whether some people view it as "nice" or not.

If you were a mom, would you only be cooking for your children in the hope that they would appreciate it- no, would you stop cooking for them if they didn't say thankyou on their own- no.

I think as a general rule, people should do good things, because its the right thing to do, not because we expect praise.

As a feminist I love it when a man acts like a gentlemen, chivalry is not dead- its still much appreciated. I love it when my guy opns the door for me, or makes sure he cares the heavy bags, you know, many of us women still really appreciate those things, whether we voice it or not.

And as for this "feminist" friend thinking its sexist, maybe she's crazy or odesnt understand that feminism is not about being treated like a man, and having the right to pee while standing, Its the constant battle to gain equal oppertunity in the home, the workplace and greater world.

Good Luck, man, and thanks for holding the door, because at least I appreciate it:)

deratbs · Accepted Answer

I like it when anyone holds open the door, it's polite and I do it myself. However , as a woman it can be annoying if a guy goes out of his way to hold it open. If me and another person are approaching the door at the same time then it's natural that one of us should hold it open but sometimes guys will stand there for ages letting every women go in or he'll run from behind you to open the door and that's uncomfortable and sexist. So use common sense , be polite and don't run to hold it open just because the person is female. For me its holding out chairs at restaurants that I find far more sexist and plain annoying.

stargazer1 · Accepted Answer

I definately like it when someone opens the door for me. Guy or girl. If I am having a crappy day, it makes you feel as though I am actually there, and am not invisible, especially if you are having a bad day. It is nice to feel like you are there. I'd say thank you. But some people may not say thank you because maybe they are thinking about something else and are having such a bad day, they don't want to talk to anyone (even if it is a nice gesture, opening a door).

Cool-Relax · Accepted Answer

It's not sexist to hold a door open, it's common courtesy. If there's someone behind me when I'm going through a door, I always hold it for them. At my school, that's just naturally what everyone does--and the guys are especially good about holding a door for a girl, even when it's kind of out of their way. I think it's sweet, honestly. They may just be doing it to be polite, but it's nice to know that guys are still willing to do that in this day and age.

Captain-Sarah · Answer

Yes do it.  I think women took the whole feminist thing way too far.  I would love for a man to hold open every door for me.  My brother in law opens the car door for my sister every time and me when I'm with them.  I don't think my man has ever done that.  I think it is great for a man to respect a woman like that.  I don't see it as a showing of disrespect but a showing of respect.  What the hell was wrong with women.  I'd never burn my bra!

kgal1798 · Answer

omg so i have this weird thing i think its majorly attractive when a guy hold the door open like literally makes me melt. This really hot guy held the dorr open for me and smiled and i didn't know his name but i like ugh i need to figure it out, i like him, long story short i have have no idea who thsi amazing guy is if he idn't hold the door open for me

Shlei3 · Answer

Sexist? That's stupid. It's not sexist. I think it's common courtesy. I hold doors open for anyone. My fiance opens doors for me. As long as it's not this huge production and cheesy I don't mind. I can't stand it when a guy exclaims fairly loudly "Stop. Allow me" and then holds the door open as if he had just moved a gigantic boulder. If it's casual and he opens the door, lets me walk by and then walks in after me it's nice.

saklea · Answer

I really like it when a guy holds open a door for me. It is such a nice thing to do and I always thank the guy who did this for me, so I think so should def. not stop doing this

Aussie-EP · Answer

dude, I have never had a girl that didn't like me holding the door open for them. Just keep doing it, its polite.

punkup07 · Answer

it's not sexist to hold open a door for a woman, it's nice.

slug_slug · Answer

I like it when ANYONE holds a door open for me, so I do it for them too :) You should try saying to the next girl, who doesn't thank you for holding it open for her, a nice sarcastic 'You're welcome?' lol

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