My boyfriend says he wants to be with me, but I'm not his dream woman..?

[crzmonkey33]

My boyfriend keeps feeling the need to describe what he's looking for in a woman. He says that he was a petite Asian, who doesn't drink and is a virgin...

Well I'm black, not petite, and I drink wine occasionally, oh and I'm not a virgin. This hurts a lot when he tells me this... is he just using me until the next best thing comes along?

He says he loves me just the way I am, then he goes on to say that he lowered his standards for me... should I just break it off?

[MissAlexandra]

Well, I looked at it this way:

He wanted a petite Asian virgin... but he chose you because there was something special about you. He obviously does NOT have a way with words, though. When he said he "lowered his standards" for you, he probably meant he "broadened his horizons", meaning he went for someone he typically wouldn't go for. Some may say it sounds like I'm sugarcoating this to make you feel better, but honestly if he says he loves you just the way you are then it really does make sense!

If this continues, just let him know that he's making you feel inadequate whenever he compares you to his dream girl. He should get the hint. Good luck!

[Anonymous]

Yeah you should he definitely don't deserve you, there is not a thing he should say. Maybe you could say yeah I lowered my standard for you my dream guy is way better than you...And another thing a doctor said that insecure man are the ones that dream for a virgin girl because he doesn't want her to compare him with other guys...

[crzmonkey33]

yeah that's exactly what I'm thinking... he IS very insecure.

Too bad I'm a grown ass woman, or I would have definitely given him a taste of his own medicine, I don't have time for games tho

[Anonymous]

hmm well as an Asian myself, I personally think the kinds of men that deliberately go after Asians are extremely unattractive. you don't deserve to be treated the way he treats you, and that's a good reason to break it off if it's what you want. also, is he a virgin? if he's not, wanting to be with a virgin is kind of a double standard! I think you deserve better, good luck!

[Anonymous]

u should dump him. a woman deserves only the best.