My gym crush hot and cold behavior. How to act towards him?

Question

It is my 2nd week in gym. I like someone. He offers help, inititate talks, and steal looks.
He is always wearing earphones.
yesterday he came towards me saying It seems Im not so well. I respond Im fine nothing imp. then he asked if I would like to join him in the next hall to train some cardio together and we did. We laughed get close and gave me his phone number so he can join me whenever i want to train together.
I didn't text nor gave him my phone number i felt shy didn't want to first make a move and force myself.
the next day i was training with my female friend i tried to ask him about training help me with a move in a very short way just to melt ice but I felt he was cold and taking a distance.
In my area of living, you b hard to get and respectful to win a decent guy. no flirting and stuff
Is it me pushing him away or he's not that interested? and most imp how should I act from a guy perspective to keep him interesred and ask me out?

smg99 · Accepted Answer

I actually had the best time with my gym crush. once upon a time;)

I had a crush but I believe if you live with it you ruminate and it obstructs you from other functions of life.
In my case I was lucky I finished my dental board exams. I had to zone out in that time and be patient. However, after that I wrote him a hand written note,
I think you’re incredibly cute and handsome with hearts. Wonder if you like to go for a coffee sometime?”

I put it in his hands and ran off beet red. I watched him read the note and I was so frightened what had I done from impulsivity?

Then my heart popped out because he approached me I was expecting the worst and went numb.
He had amazing physique and dark hair, Spanish with green eyes and so fair. Omg I could die he reminded me of Superman.

Then he said; I need to talk to you. I was scared 😱 very much so. I followed him and some others were teasing us. Me especially.
Outside he bent down and asked what color lip gloss is it. Before I explained and looked up he kissed me in front of everyone in the parking lot.
Needless to say it led to a hot session backseat of my Beemer.
Then we always were together;) every day ;)

So the message is stop with being proper you will be right to the right person and wrong to the wrong ones.
Or as it’s put : your good qualities will be lost upon those not meant for you whilst your worst will be overlooked in lieu of your favorable traits to the right ones.

This is my guiding star in my own determination too.
You will be right be yourself.

He might have expected you to contact him and felt you weren’t interested. Go clear it up ;) you obviously like him too and he does too.

lovelyhoneybones · Accepted Answer

He's probably thrown off by you not texting him maybe? I don't see anything in this equation that would cause him to become distance and cold. Unless he's a very territorial (?) person and by you bringing another person to the gym he feels you've replaced him. But that's a far fetch and if he's acting like that so early on, run.

Matthieu-G · Accepted Answer

Ok. You did a couple of things wrong here so let's go over them.

1- You did not give your phone number. When a guy asks for your phone number, it's to ask you on a DATE to get to KNOW you. Not fuck you. When you say no, you are saying "Hey... I don't know you or want to know you. You are not the type of guy I want to date but I'm ok JUST being friends." (Which is why he started acting cold. No man wants to be in the "Friendzone" with an attractive woman. It makes them feel like a woman and invalid as a sexual partner.)

2- You went with your friend. A friend ruins 1 on 1 time and will not allow you to get close to him (romantically or on a friendship basis) because your mind will subconsciously try to hold the guy off so you don't come off as an easy going slut to your friend. I bet you can think of several things you would do differently if your friend wasn't there.

3- You did not initiate skin contact. I'm not talking about grabbing his man package or kissing him. I'm talking about bumping into him lightly or touching his muscles as he flexes to say "Wow!" Doing this will convey interest without being easy. He will get the message and try to make things happen with you.

If you are serious about correcting this, give him your phone number, shyness be damned or sit in the corner and forget about him. You missed the opportunity and only you can fix this at this point. Either way, things will be fine, you learned valuable information from this interaction.

djmzes · Accepted Answer

Simple

truthbeknown · Answer

I think he was expecting you to call or text him the night he gave you his number. So to him, that was strike one. Then the next time he saw you, you were with someone else, so strike two. But, I don't think any real damage has been done because this is just moving too fast and it's only been a couple of weeks. He could have had something totally unrelated to you that had him bothered that day. I would just write that day off and try again next time.

spartan55 · Answer

He probably didn't want to play third wheel because your friend was with you that time. If you don't text or call him then don't expect anything to happen. For all he knows, you aren't interested.

sonnysunshine · Answer

Well it doesn’t help that you didn’t give him your number. I get it that you were shy/nervous. But he probably took that as a sign that you are not that attracted to him. Now he’s worried about looking creepy if he talks to you too much

Put your big girl pants on and start a conversation with him and give YOUR number. Tell him you wouldn’t mind if he texted/called you sometime to workout.

He already did his job approaching you. Now it’s your turn to reciprocate.

DWD94 · Answer

The dude is obviously interested but you displayed negative body-language that showed his feelings aren't reciprocated. He gave you his number, you didn't text him. He interpreted that as "She doesn't like me" and now he's keeping his distance.

GraveDoll · Answer

You got his damn number. wth? Text the mutha fucker or leave it alone. this is so dumb...

24brownish · Answer

I honestly do not like your type of behavior, what more do u want him to do, he initiated.. he gave u his number.. what more.. u want him to bend the knee?
Ofc he is distancing now cuz u acted cold urself and did not respond to his moves..

anon1903 · Answer

sounds like a dreamy guy. try doing activities together and a little flirting might help.

Kiran_Yagami · Answer

25-29? Crushes are for 16 year olds. You're an adult now. If you want him, go get him.

bklynbadboy1 · Answer

He might just be into his work out cause that how I am when I'm in the gym I'm serious about my work out

TheFlak38 · Answer

" i felt shy didn't want to first make a move" here is your problem. Fix it.

Browneye57 · Answer

So many games... so little time. FAIL

Joker_ · Answer

Tell him you love his ass

Anonymous · Answer

How can I offer help to females at gym?

My gym crush hot and cold behavior. How to act towards him?

Most Helpful Opinions

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

My gym crush hot and cold behavior. How to act towards him?

Most Helpful Opinions

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

We're glad to see you liked this post.