I need some insight: I recently got hired at probably the first job I’ve ever actually loved and I was lucky to get, working at a middle school as an aide to two male teachers. I am an attractive female (30’s) about 11 years younger than my male coworkers. All three of us are married and have mentioned our spouses. One of the teachers (the one I work with more often) is very attractive to me and I have felt serious sexual tension around him and attraction towards him (I have zero clue if he feels that way back). However I love my husband and have zero intentions of ever cheating on him. However I have noticed that this guy is seriously a charmer and has a flirtatious, and extremely likable personality. Some co-workers have called him “shy” but I actually find him very social, reserved, yet playful/flirty. And it is frustrating for me because of my attraction towards him. Lately he seemed to to be a bit more flirty than before: Playfully pulling the napkins away from me in the break room so I couldn’t reach them, joking with me and teasing me. When we talk, we both hold eye contact a lot more intensely than I think is normal, often standing closer to each other at times than I feel is normal etc. And then there’s days where he seemed flustered and nervous around me. However, he then will come in and suddenly be super aloof towards me, almost cold, like I’ve done something wrong and he doesn’t even like me. My other male coworker has expressed noticing that as a friend he can go hot and cold towards him too. I feel jerked around. I just want to have a professional yet friendly relationship with him. But his playful flirty then cold removed back and forth has me frustrated and extremely confused. I want to keep this job as I love it. And it is not an option to avoid him at work because I am literally his aide and work side by side to him. Why is he acting like this?
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TAKE COnTRol of thE Situation
Abort abort abort. Abort the ship.
Dont trust me but believe that these mind games are fked up and it ain't gonna end well foe your job + family.
Unless you want live on the edge.10
Is this affected by whoever is around? He may not want others seeing him flirty with others.1
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The real question is why do women act this way? Could be your answer.13
Well it's probably him not getting flirting back or its the guy wanting sex and moving on.
Might be he did not feel you two gave him attention back.0
Maybe tell him your frustrations?0
So, what happened after he took the napkin?0
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Honestly... I don't know why he does that but my advice is if you want to keep the job and you think the flirting and stuff might jeopardize it... Don't flirt back anymore... You can still be friendly just not flirty anymore and he'll probably take the hint and stop flirting too... 🤷