I got too attached and pulled away but I still want him, help?

[ErickaM0490]

The guy I like and was talking to is really sweet but I feel like he leads me on. He texts me all the time and never ignores me, tells me what I wanna hear, is really flirty and affectionate when we’re together... but rarely makes time for me unless it’s on his terms and at night when he’s done with everyone else. He goes out with friends and posts on social media, groups of guys and girls, and never invites me. He doesn’t invite me anywhere or include me in his life like that.

I tried to talk to him about it twice and told him I didn’t feel like a priority. He said he didn’t like to make plans because he forgets he made them, he’s not ready for a relationship and he doesn’t spend a lot of time with me because he doesn’t want to get attached. He also said he didn’t think I was very interested and he has said he doesn’t feel like I’m his type or that I’m attracted to him. He said he wanted to be best friends first. So I tried but I still felt like the last person he wanted to see and he was my priority. Even though I made him my priority I did my own thing and didn’t just jump whenever he wanted to see me. I wasn’t clingy and usually waited for him to text me first.

I’ve been ignoring him since Sunday. I need space because I was getting attached and he needs it as well. But I still want him, even if it is just friends for now, but I actually want to feel like a friend. What am I supposed to do now? I want him to miss me and figure out what he wants.

[standingUP]

Not that he's not into you he just isn't THAT into you.

I don't know you but I feel empathy for your rejection (cyber hugs).
Basically he is keeping you on the line to make sure he's not ever lonely once all others reject him first. You're the back-burner girl.
Don't you think you deserve better than this guy? Because you do.
I'm sure this is a great guy and you like a lot of qualities he posses but he doesn't feel the same for you or you would be priority. It's hurtful to hear but you've been hurt enough just by eagerly wanting him more than he wants to give you. This is not what you need.
Nothing is wrong with you either so don't start making excuses for him. The right man would do what he possibly could to include you and their out there waiting for a girl like you. So move on from this dude. Make yourself available for someone to give you the respect you deserve.

[Browneye57]

You CANNOT negotiate attraction and desire. You're a warm place to put it. OR are you not having sex?
This is going nowhere.

[ErickaM0490]

No we’re not, he says he doesn’t like meaningless sex and wants to wait until there is feelings so we don’t ruin it.

[Browneye57]

You're trying to seduce a guy that's just not really into you. I'm telling you that you're wasting your time.

[btbc92]

He's only pulling back because you're pulling back. Take a good look at him. You are who you attract!

[ErickaM0490]

I wasn’t pulling back until a couple days ago. Clearly he doesn’t want me or he would make himself clear.

[btbc92]

You have always pulled back because of your philophobic. I am certain he is not the only guy you've done that to.

[btbc92]

Plus he just said he is not looking for a relationship. You also have attachment issues.

[ErickaM0490]

I was not always pulling back but when someone tells you they don’t want a relationship or to get attached to you, isn’t that the only option left? I’ve fought hard for guys who were like this in the past and only got hurt in the end. The last thing I want is to look needy and scare him away.

[btbc92]

Thays up to you. There is always friendship and trying to get to know a person. Otherwise, your being pretty selfish to try to force somebody into a relationship. All you have to do is move on. You only attract them because your the same way.

[ErickaM0490]

I don’t understand your negativity towards me. I explained that I was trying to be his friend. i never once tried to force anyone into a relationship. He crosses the line of friends all the time and instead of simpler being my friend and inviting me places like friends do he was baiting me and playing games. He would say “I really wanna come cuddle with you” and then when I would say ok he would tell me it was too late and he was going to bed. Or he would say “where are you I wanna see you, and I’d say I’m with friends and then he’d say let me come over when you get home” but when I would text him he would say he was just going to go to bed. He sends me pics telling me he looks rough, baiting me into a response. I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do because none of that looks like simple friendship to me. I clearly like him but I don’t wanna be led on and kept on a back burner just to feed his ego until he finds someone else. A friendship with be getting to know someone properly without all the unnecessary baiting. Invite me places, get to know me, invite me with some friends so it’s casual. No what he’s doing is saying one thing and doing another.

[Avicenna]

Dont waste any more time on him