Guys, why would a guy disappear suddenly if he said he likes you?

[SalamiSalmonella]

A few months back I reunited with an old friend. (I'll be skipping most of details make it fit). He kept asking if i liked him. Eventually I fell for him He lives far, so we werent a thing, but he would wait for me to go there in September. We said we'd share a house and go to the same university. Then some stuff changed. He took up his fathers offer to open his own catering in a different place and moved back with his family. So that plan was dead. Anyway, we kept talking, so he said I could move with him in his new house in the town he was opening his business ( which, by the way, also didn't happen after all..). He was getting stressed, I could feel it. Anyway, I told him I loved him accidentally one time, but I meant it. A couple of weeks later we talked about it and he said he ignored it cause he didn't believe it was real. Even though I had shown him i did so many times, the way I could at least. A few days later he had barely spoken to me cause he had been working. I asked him if he still liked me. He said: hmmm, maybe I still like you. What did that mean? Its highly possible he was teasing me like he usually did, but I kept thinking that he meant that literally. The next morning we texted each other good morning like always. In the afternoon I noticed he no longer was following me on instagram. Neither was I. 'Did you remove me from insta?' 'yes' 'why' ' you keep tagging me everywhere. 'I felt so confused. I had only tagged him in 5 photos and he never minded, i always asked. I said : You said you didn't mind. What happened that made you change your mind? To which he replied 'Too much conversation' and then blocked me everywhere. What bothers me is why he did all this? Does anyone have any idea?

Updates

+1 y

It's been 68 days. And everyday I miss him more. Maybe I shouldn't, but I still do. I have tried a couple of times to call him, but I never got to him, only to recently find out that he probably changed his number since he now uses his old number in his store. I'm out of options I think. All I can do now is wait or give up and try to forget him.

[thisguy54U]

He might have gotten scared and he wasn't sure of himself. If he wasn't sure he could take care of both of u then he would change and not want to tell u he was feeling insecure. That's just what I might do unless he was seeing someone but that's always on in the back of my head. I hope u can figure it out or at least not dwell on it it's not your fault. He has to b honest with himself before he can b honest with anyone else

[SalamiSalmonella]

i dunno, maybe. Other people who have read our conversations and heard us talk before said they believe he felt things and got scared. Even my friends mother who's a fortune teller said he seems to be afraid cause we are a great match and he doesn't know how to handle it. He's been thinking about money a lot. He had told me once that he doesn't wanna be serious yet and he wants to have money before he turns to me. Does he worry he won't be able to afford having me? I mean.. i wouldn't care even if he didn't have a penny, i just want him, is that too much to ask?

[thisguy54U]

I asked myself the same thing when I went through the process of trying to love someone. They seemed to get scared and they pulled away I asked them y. All she said was that she didn't want to b a burden on me. All I wanted was to love her I felt like it was my fault because I had changed jobs and I was not able to take care of us.

[SalamiSalmonella]

I just find this so weird. I never ask anything of him. All I want is to love him. And I want him to love me back. I dont care if we live in a tiny apartment, or in a mansion or in a box in the street..

[thisguy54U]

Yeah I know I don't think it matters sometimes. He might need to hear that but I don't think it's going to b a lot of help. It's hard to change someone's mind if they r scared. I'm so sorry u have gone through this it's hard on a heart to have love so clos4 then taken away.

[SalamiSalmonella]

thanks for your sympathy.. I really dont know what to do anymore. I can't even call him.

[thisguy54U]

I know it feels like someone took everything good in your heart and filled it with loneliness. I hope u can get through it if there's anything I can help u understand I'll b here young lady

[SalamiSalmonella]

Thank you very much, I appreciate it.

[Anonymous]

sounds like he might have felt that you were moving too fast and he wanted to relax and take things slow. Maybe he needed some space and felt like you were always messaging him. Even if it didn't seem like a lot to you, it might have been stressing him out when he wanted to pause and take time to think things over.

[SalamiSalmonella]

that would be funny, cause he was the one who asked me to move in with him and work with him and move all the way to the other side of the country just to be together. And I was the one that said that if it's not going to be serious it's not happening.

[Opinion Owner]

it's common for people to do those things and then realize they weren't ready to do that.

[SalamiSalmonella]

well, he's known me for years. He sould have known by now that I'm not the type to play around with.

[SalamiSalmonella]

i would barely even text him 3 messages a day when he was busy. Just to check that he's still alive.

[Opinion Owner]

sure. people should know a lot of things, but that doesn't mean we always handle everything perfectly. We can still make mistakes, go too far, have plans fall out from under us, and change our minds about things frequently.

[SalamiSalmonella]

well, either way, that was cruel. He can't he cares about me and then throw me away as if i were trash

[Opinion Owner]

yeah I don't like how he handled it either

[SalamiSalmonella]

some people are just... ugh

[Bhavin2184]

Personal opinion leave him he is clearly losing interest in you.
In the end your life your choice

[chriscdi]

maybe he is just busy or lost his phone or some shit

[SalamiSalmonella]

does ANYONE read my post ffs?

[chriscdi]

sorry when i clicked on it, it only showed the updated side, it didn't show me your story, it just popped up now when i refreshed the question

[chriscdi]

alright i read it, the spark just died, nothing much too it, you can see the the spark y'all had faded over time from both sides, he unfollowed you not cause you tag him everywhere but because his ego wanted the last step, someone had to end it and he was the one that chose to do so first

[SalamiSalmonella]

it hadn't died for me, but i thought it did for him. It was so weird. He didn't seem like he wanted to end it. I had told him multiple times anyways. Whenever he teased me and tried to make me jealous I told him that if he wants to see someone else, he can, I wasn't gonna stop him and that all he had to do is let me know. The day before he blocked me, I was on the phone with him. He said he had started not talking to most people and he needed a break from everyone. I asked if everyone included me and he said that he didn't feel the need to stop talking to me yet. It was all too sudden and without and actual reason.

[chriscdi]

sounds to me like he lost interest and doesn't know how to tell you yet, are you still blocked on instagram? cause if so then dont be surprised if he chooses to block you out of eveeything without a peep, all you can really do eight now is either wait patiently for him to come back from needing space or just call it a roadblock and move on, just know if he is just taking a break and you decide to move on then you are gonna lose him, now if you stick around and he is just gonna pook on you, then you'll waste time and probably end up being more hurt at the end, because your hopes would be high of him coming back, its a hard choice for both but i think in situations like this, you gotta look out for number 1

[SalamiSalmonella]

he hasn't blocked me. I'm just not following him and his account has always been private. I've waited 69 days i could wait longer if needed. I told him I always get what I want and I WILL get what I want.

[chriscdi]

well the thing is that if he doesn't want you, thats someone you'll never have, you waited 2 months? thats a long time but you a real one tho, just kinda sucks watching you being put on hold, well if you are gonna wait, dont go full on with it tho just talk to other people even as just friends or something so if another spark starts with someone else then this other guy just loses his chance, i just dont find it fair that you are waiting for him when i have the feeling he wouldn't do the same for you, for a serious relationship to start you need effort from both sides, not just one, if you know what im sayin, either ways, i wish you the best, i hope he comes around no lie 💯🙏👌🏼

[SalamiSalmonella]

thats the thing. I never like anyone. BUt when I do, I only want them, until I dont. And he isn't like most guys. He actually cared. If only he wasn't constantly thinking about money. Can you believe it? 'I dont wanna be serious yet. I wanna make my money and then turn to you' He said that to me.

[chriscdi]

he is making a mistake, i know cause i did that, like straight up that was my mentality, i left school for that shit too lol

thats crazy, but i know what he means, need money to take care of your family, debts and shit, fams gotta eat and shit, can't really bash on him for that cause i understand it, thing is that the mistake is just shunning everyone because you wanna make money, there's nothing u can do trust me, he is gonna be alone like that for a while, try talking him out of it

[SalamiSalmonella]

I wish I could. I cnet get him to talk to me.

[chriscdi]

then im sorry, his mind is set, might wanna move on, as hard as it will be or wait for him to get rich

[SalamiSalmonella]

no, as in, I dont have his new number and i cnat find him in the store, whenever i call his mum picks up

[chriscdi]

then you have a way to contact him, try what you can and if you can't stop him, dip.

[BOYBOYBOYBO]

Guys are scared if you like them or not he didn't want to have to face you if you said no.

[SalamiSalmonella]

did you read my post?

[BigPhatHairycrap]

payback

[SalamiSalmonella]

what for?

[BigPhatHairycrap]

probably the time when u friendzoned him and wouldn't show him any love back

[SalamiSalmonella]

i didn't friendzone him, i didn't know how I felt. And he is not the type to seek revenge.
I loved him shitless, and I still do. He was the one making it hard for me to understand.

[BigPhatHairycrap]

oh, i dont know then... maybe he died in a carcrash or something

[SalamiSalmonella]

he's alive

[BigPhatHairycrap]

no idea... ask him... maybe he secretly found a different girl or something

[SalamiSalmonella]

did you even read my post?

[BigPhatHairycrap]

na, i read a few sentences, the rest was too long n boring, couldnt concentrate so i gave up reading

[BigPhatHairycrap]

u added to much unneccasry details.. u need to get more short n straight to the main points

[SalamiSalmonella]

... You're ideas are useless to me then.

[SalamiSalmonella]

why would you even answer?

[SalamiSalmonella]

those were important details that help make a conclusion. Sorry you found it boring. Next time dont even bother clicking my post.

[BigPhatHairycrap]

points duhh