When being mysterious and aloof is your best asset?

[play-wright-boy]

All the girls who've liked me have always told me how much they liked me because I was different from most guys. They said that I was mysterious, aloof, and even brooding.

The problem is that I lose all those qualities when I aggressively chase girls that I like! Thus, all my life, I've had a lot of girls like me but I never get the ones that I pursue.

I suppose all guys have the problem of never getting the one they truly want. But it seems that my most attractive trait is directly opposed to, well, a direct approach.

Maybe I can be "assertively mysterious" towards a girl I like? My problem is that I lack patience at times like that and rush in, usually pushing the girl away.

So I suppose I need to learn patience and how to indirectly pursue girls while not losing my charms of mysteriousness and aloofness. What do you guys think?

[RedThread78]

Yeah I think you can manage that. I have to say I'm a lot like you. I can be very openly sociable but without divulging to much about myself. My friends actually tell me I'm like a vault because even though I can be funny and hang out in groups they really don't know much about me besides where I work and live. I've noticed sometimes women try to get closer to me to try to get to know more about me so I think it will work for you. The only thing is you have to put yourself out there to some degree or else they won't know what you are like to begin with.

[Anonymous]

Yeah, I think patience would complete this indirect approach that you are trying to master. I mean, the mysterious and enigmatic charm is alluring, but unlike the direct approach, you kind of have to let the girl come to you. Personally, I'd rather get the girl through a more dominant and direct approach, just because I like the chase and I get after what I want. But learning patience and a different approach would reserve these traits. Using some witty humor could also help to attract the girl.

Hope this helps.

[Anonymous]

i think you should just be yourself. honestly. don't you get tired of trying to figure out what approach for what girl? it's exhausting