You can trust people to be people, they're pretty consistent. What you can't trust them to do is behave according to YOUR standards.
There's a parable that goes something like this:
There's a flood and frog and scorpion are stranded on an island. The water is rising and the island is going to be underwater soon. Frog says, well, lucky I can swim, sorry scorpion, it looks like you're dunfer. Scorpion says, please Frog, carry me on your back to safety, I promise I won't sting you. Frog says, no way dude, you're going to sting me. Scorpion says, no I promise, I won't. It wouldn't make sense to sting you when you are carrying me to safety; we would both sink and I would die with you. Frog says fair point, okay let's go. So Scorpion gets on his back and Frog starts carrying him to safety. They are about halfway there and Scorpion plunges his stinger into Frog over and over. As Frog is dying and they are both sinking, he says "why Scorpion, now you will die with me like you said and knew you would. Why did you sting me?"
Scorpion says, "Because I am a scorpion. It is what I do."
He isn't happy with just one, or he just wants arm candy while he is on the hunt for more.
Guys are going to look. Girls need to get over their insecurity about this. You can't stop it from happening, or them browsing and imaging. No one controls others' minds. It belongs to them.
The thing is, he should not be obvious about it. If he cannot control himself, and is always getting busted staring (that's staring, not glancing), then he's probably not worth keeping. He's a throw-back. Re-bait, and try again. They're not all like that, not even close. Especially when you start getting with older guys or more mature for their age guys.
It’s not good looks that keep a man loyal, he has to feel relational compatibility with you and that often means he has to be similar enough with you to find you relatable in his mind. I know guys with gorgeous woman who were not loyal and I know guys with very ugly woman who were. Not to cast any slur on you, since personalities can vary in a myriad of ways.
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I am a religious person and I try not to check out girls. I am not saying I don't totally look at girls or walk with my eyes closed. If an attractive person passes by our eyes will look even for a mili second like a reflex action. The best I can do is turn my eyes away as quickly as I can and avoid looking continuously. It was hard when I was younger but now it's easier to avoid intentionally checking out. I don't turn my head around to look at the attractive girl passing by.
But I don't do this because I love someone, I do this because God told me to lower my gaze. I fail at it sometimes (maybe lots of times but I try not to). I learned that if I had a good reason to not check out girls then I can avoid doing it.
But until I was 19 it was quite hard to resist the temptation. Lots of my friends can't avoid it. Sometimes I even caught married older men checking out and I was like wtf dude.. I realised that you have to try to avoid it since a young age otherwise you can turn 70 and still not be able to avoid checking out.
The majority of men and women are going to check out. You can either remain single or just accept the reality.
Well to be honest to be honest I've had some very beautiful girlfriends and to be honest when a girl is walking by and I was with my girlfriend I would make it a point to let my girlfriend see me looking at that girl but I also made it a point to make sure my girlfriend have no insecurities whatsoever about me but I was doing where I was going and who I was with just like in the same day we would both check out guys checking her out and all I can do is smile or say she's hot isn't she there's two different guys who's the guys that are going to look and respect the way that they're looking at the girl they're just checking it out then there's the guys that are checking her out hard that's one thing I can say that I am I'm going to have a girlfriend I am loyal and I am committed
I have seen both men and women looking. Let Brad Pitt pass me by, i’ll certainly look. But i wouldn't touch (well i mean maybe for a hug and autograph... but i wouldn't get sexual nor intentionally disrespect my partner). My thing is, if you're gonna look, do it when you're not around your partner. And as for touching, just dont do it at all (unless its for a celeb hug and an autograph lol). You honestly shouldn't fully trust anyone but God. Only he knows how things will turn out. Shoot, sometimes i dont even trust my dang self
Ok. I understand why you don't trust your exes and your friends' boyfriends. What about the ones you or your friends never dated because you thought they were losers or something like that? The ones who are in some kind of emotional misery? Guys who were single all their life and would probably give their hearth and soul to their first serious relationship? Would you trust them?
Lol sorry I'm just venting because I'm tired of seeing generalizations because of a handful of pricks. But please, do answer my question, I'm geniunely curious.
good! dont trust us! Lump us all in that box. Think we are all the same! Whatever helps you sleep at night! All of us aren't scumbags. All of us do not fucking cheat on the people we are with, all of us do respect our significant other. Granted - there is.00005% (Im trying to defend you mofos so I expect the same in return) We look.. WE DONT TOUCH.. WE DONT FANTASIZE! WE ARE WITH YOU. We are dating you, we are married to you, we are engaged to you, we are in long term relationships and sometimes LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIPS AS WELL!!!
In your hurt and hubris... you fail to realize that what your Suitor finds attractive in You
is ALSO reflected and represented in myriad other females who are ALSO 'Avatars' of the divine Goddess---
Think of it as him checking out HER reflection of 'You' in the circumstance's mirror.
In so far as HE is going home with... and to... YOU to express his 'worship' to THAT Goddess,
it should be YOUR focus to assure his fidelity is preferentially served in YOUR 'temple'.
YOU are the High Priestess of YOUR 'franchise' of HER adulation. HOW WELL you manage YOUR worship services will determine WHERE he goes to 'church'! to hear the wisdom of her sermon and experience divine 'communion'~ ) O (
You have to risk something when you're dating that's just how it is. My friend was with a woman for 10 years and she just left with no warning and took his car and his dog. A guy has to invest a lot into dating or a relationship and a woman can just decide any time that he's not good enough and think she deserves better (it can be true or not true doesn't matter).
If you only think about the worst case scenario you will never get anywhere in dating this is true even more than in other areas in life. You can play it safe in some places and it will be fine but in dating it just doesn't work that way. You still need to protect yourself and stand up for yourself but you can't stop someone from betraying you if they want to do it. In that area you just need to be strong enough to take the hit.
And a guy checking out girls doesn't mean anything faithful guys check out girls too it's just an instinct. It's the rest of his behavior that matters.
It's a nice feeling to be admired, why can't we enjoy it if girls takes interest especially as we put the effort in to be desirable. Sometimes an insecure girl will have a guy feel undesirable with her coldness. I'm not suggesting to play the jealousy game at all, but a little competition is a positive reinforcement to step up your game before he really does start looking at other options. However, I admit sometimes a guy has to act real fast to stop a situation so that the girl he's out with does not feel insecure. Girls' can't always blame us, if i really think my girlfriend is the hottest girl on the planet, I assume she'll be feisty and tell the competition to back off. But a girl can and will sometimes will be outdone and feel embarrassed for trying to compete. So the guy has a responsibility, just know if a good-looking girl even senses a weakeness in a couple, she's going in for the steal 😅
I get you. It's annoying. Men have to force themselves not to look. They look, they have a flash of the nastiest thought ever and they move on. Whoever was ogling you probably already forgot you. You or a part of you may pop up in a personal moment later on.
You, your friend and the mail lady. Guys will always wonder how would she be. Doesn't diminish their love for the special one.
Others have impluse control issues and women don't have to do much to seduce a man. Men want many partners naturally. They are biologically wored this way. It ensures the human race continues.
But humans have intelligence and societies. This is where the struggle comes in. Enjoy being hot & sexy I suppose.
Well maybe most men are like that but not ALL...
By the way it's impossible for a wise guy to have princess rapunzel with him and cares about others 😊
If i had a girl like miss alyssa rapunzel, i'll be busy measuring her hair length and smelling the garden of flowers which is coming out of it and when she smiles, she will take me to another world where she will be the only female who exists 😌
So since some girls cheat too can I generalize them as well. This is lazy and quite frankly horrible reasoning. All people are different. Some are shitty. There’s also another option here. Maybe those are the kind of people that you and your friends attract. Personal anecdote is never really a good way to come to a conclusion as a whole. There may be common factors between you and your friends that shift which way things are going to go.
Of course we will. Women do it to. Everyone like looking at pretty things. I do it but at the end of the day i like the girl that i dated. So unless she gave me reason otherwise, i have no need/want to change that relationship with her just because i look at other girls
Women also do that. Why are you making a gender thing out of it? Amd what's wrong with checking out other people?
You're entitled to not trust men, but you'll end up miserable and lonely that way. So good luck.
There’s always cuter and better girls around so we can’t help but to look. You’re gonna have sexy tall thick girls you’re gonna have girls in all kind of shapes and sizes. My dad is 65 and I even see him look at women when they walk by. Not around my mom but me
I know lots of women who think about fucking other guys while they have sex with you. That’s even worse in my opinion.
the guy is only looking but after a few seconds has already forgotten all about her.
the girl meanwhile is emotionally sexually thinking about another dude while have sex with you. That’s worse!
Most of the time I don't even realize I'm looking. I'm not even thinking any thoughts at all. It's like watching a bird or moving car. I'm not trying to fuck it. It's just, "hey look! A thing. It moves."
You certainly have very good reason for feeling the way you do. I hope you have better experiences in the future.
Some of these sweet guys talking about finding good men are in relationships.
Ask them to swear on their kids/mothers’ lives that they don’t watch porn.
Almost every guy looks at other women even in relationships. Those guys are mostly full of shit.
It also says nothing about the woman he’s with though.
I find it normal. I mean it would worry me if my boyfriend is into men if he doesn't check out women lol
Of course when you check out other men and your THOUSANDS of other options you see no problem at all. When the man does it it's a red flag. When the woman does it it's fair play. #FemaleDoubleStandards
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