Why do (some) men like materialistic women?

Question

There’s a type of woman where her love and attention comes at a price. You’re probably thinking of a promiscuous gold digger or something like that. But that doesn’t have to be the case. A lot of so called “good girls” in marriages are like this as well.

This woman always wants something that the man has to provide for her. A new car, house renovation, a new pool, luxurious trip. And he does it all. And he respects her, treats her well and even seem to enjoy it.

I’m the type of person that doesn’t ask for much. And I’ve been financially privileged most of my life. In relationships, I don’t get the same appreciation. It comes to the point where I might not even get a birthday present or flowers.

So now I have theory, that men actually like women that want materialistic things? Makes them feel good to be able to provide? Put’s a value to the relationship because they have invested $. But there should be a balance, not too much but not too little.

So how would I be a little more materialistic, but not too much? How does one balance that? Asking for stuff is just weird to me.

DWornock · Accepted Answer

All normal women are materialistic. Therefore, if men like women, they like materialistic women. However, a few women are overly materialistic. Most pretty young women will choose a sexy good looking professional (such as an engineer, accountant, or lawyer) with an above-average income over a much older rich man. Overly materialistic women pretty young women would choose the much older rich man.

Men are attracted to exceptionally beautiful women including those that are overly materialistic. That in no way implies, they prefer overly materialist women.

Wealthy men love arm candy and they love showing her off to their envious friends and acquaintances. Since she is gorgeous, to keep her, they will spend a lavish amount of money on her. If you are not gorgeous, men will not treat you that way. And, since gorgeous women are very rare, almost certainly, you are not gorgeous.

How men treat you is highly correlated with your looks and is very lowly correlated with being materialistic other than the fact that gorgeous women demand being treated exceptionally well. Therefore, your hypothesis (it doesn't rise to the level of a theory) that men prefer materialistic women over less materialistic women is false.

TurboKid · Accepted Answer

I don't and thankfully my wife isn't like that. We both don't like to own so many fancy things even though we both make a decent salary. We do like to spend money but more on things like hanging out with friends, traveling to new countries, etc.

I think both of us value physical touch and quality time as love language more than things like gifts. We also don't compliment each other much (we tend to tease each other far more than flatter). That said I do get her gifts like on her birthday and Christmas (and without her asking), although she's difficult to shop for since she's not into things like flowers and jewelry. I'm also difficult to shop for in the same way so we often just take each other out to dinner and give each other things like food or alcohol. I did surprise her with a new iPad this year for her birthday though since she loves her iPad but hers was getting old.

Maybe guys who genuinely like those types of women and love to shower women with gifts and compliments find it an easy way to show their appreciation. It's also easier if they have very busy jobs than spending lots of time with them.

Breanna_nonbinary · Accepted Answer

Omg yes!!! Men just go around thinking I need to find a woman that’s going to drain my bank account. I need a woman who loves me for my money. I want a woman that is so superficial that if I didn’t have money to give her she’d leave me. I want a woman who will most likely leave me when she finds another man who has more money.
Yeah. That’s every man’s dream.

FoxnEagle · Answer

"Makes them feel good to be able to provide?"
Short answer. Yes

"So how would I be a little more materialistic, but not too much? How does one balance that?"
You don't have to be materialistic to make a man feel good about being able to provide. We can provide our time, experiences, memories, etc. and I would argue the material things are the least of what we can provide. Find something you think you both would enjoy and start talking about it, if he's interested he'll want to do it as well. As for balancing it, you're going to have to find out if he is a "I want to do this, do you want to tag along?" kind of person or a "Were going to go do this and I know you'll have fun as soon as I get you out of your comfort zone" kind of person. The former I would say you should expect to balance it about even, give and take about equally what you want to do. The latter you'll probably have to lead and you'll need to find the threshold of "too much, I don't want to go/do anything for a while."

Anonymous · Answer

These "men" are what I would say are having a "small PP syndrome" (or their fragile masculinity like WTF, who castrated them? Because women, that make more money than men certainly didn't castrate them) and the only way they would feel big and powerful is by throwing money at gold diggers and buying her like she's a submissive slave and he's the master because he can't feel powerful in any other way (which is freaking sad). In other words - it feeds their toxic masculinity and they even get offended if not even butthurt if she wants to pay for herself for once (WTF?). It's a weird fetish, that I never understood what the appeal there is. From my perspective it's just like looking after a child except it's a freaking grown woman and not a child.

But then again humans are weird creatures. At times they can be brilliant geniuses and at other times their stupidity knows no limits. They go as far as paying e-girls on OnlyFans quite the money for some pictures or videos, ordering bath water from Belle Delphine and even cuckoldry gaining acceptance.

Any self-respecting and especially independent woman would do best if she runs away from these "men" that think throwing money at women is fun. They bring nothing but their money, small PP syndrome and unsolicited trouble and fights. They will gaslight you and they will leverage their money to have it their way against your will!

Stay safe!

Gray-Wisp · Answer

It is a man's duty to provide for his spouse. He's basically fulfilling his role in providing resources. There was a study showing that men favor MMOs a lot more than women on average compared to other game genres. They suspected that this is because gathering resources is in a man's evolutionary nature and so he feels fulfilled. There is nothing wrong with wanting nice things but it is often seen as very shallow if that is a primary motivation in a relationship. Just make materialist suggestions, I suppose.

msc545 · Answer

Men don't really like materialistic women because they like to buy them things oh, they like materialistic women because they usually look pretty darn good and I like being with good looking women and having sex with good looking women. Unfortunately as usual there is always a price to pay with women like this. I still stay well away from them

Browneye57 · Answer

Sure, men have a need to be needed.
But putting up with a golddigger? Uh no.

I think you're confused, and here's why.
For the vast majority of women, they are seeking out a man that, among other things, can actually support her and the 84 children she wants to have with him, in the lifestyle to which she is accustomed. She would have to be an idiot to not at least seek a minimum level of success, affluence, for the bare minimums. Like a house and a car. No girl worth her salt wants a dead-broke loser of a guy. PERIOD.

Now what happens is this gets construed into being needy and wanting like a spoiled brat, and I just think that's not so much the case the majority of the time.

rievious · Answer

Giving stuff is easy. By giving an item to receive gratitude makes the entire relationship easier bc the alternative is our time and regrettably I admit that I don't always want to talk to anybody, including my partner. It's much easier to buy her flowers and see that big smile on her face then receive a hug. Instant gratitude and love for a small price of a pretty thing to decorate her life. She's happy and I'm happy I got a hug from the woman I love.

Now, what physical object can you receive that would give you happiness to give instant gratitude like that? That is up to you. For my girlfriend it's food. Easy. We also play video games together but that's time and it's not for everyone (neither is material things). Generic stuff is flowers or jewelry and that's really all I can think of right now.

LZPanzer · Answer

I think you misunderstand what a gold digger is. A gold digger is not just someone with materialistic desires and goals. What makes a person a gold digger is the manipulation and intent behind those materialistic desires. A good woman views the MONEY as a tool to enrich the relationship. A gold digger views the PARTNER as a tool to enrich THEMSELVES.

HawkPerception · Answer

Some men think that they can buy girls. Those are generally the men that think of women as a lesser species and think the world revolves around them. They may or may not believe that money buys love, but the main thing is they think they're on top of the world as long as they have money.

Anonymous · Answer

I think you are confusing 2 very different things.

Some men may enjoy providing because it validates them, people of all genders can like to feel valued and useful etc.

Some men who have money may enjoy using materialistic women because he knows he knows he can get whatever he wants and if she doesn't like it there is another freeloader waiting to take her place.

Silas_153 · Answer

I don't like anyone who is materialistic, because I'm not like that myself at all. Just the opposite, in fact, so I don't know what you're going on about. The best way to deter a gold-digger would probably be to just tell her that you're broke and unemployed.

AmeerX · Answer

Here is problem with financially independent women I have come across.
They are not happy if they get a gift, they don't like to talk about intimacy and when you tell them you want to support them they get all crazy controlling type.
Seriously women, we know you are successful so what? We aimed for you for a reason and that's a family and life. Not your money.

EssenceOfLight · Answer

Those guys assume this kind of woman is easier predictable because they think as long as they have money their partner will remain obedient?

SupremeWarlord · Answer

Everybody is materialistic, it's hard to balance that, but my guess is when it starts bothering your partner, then it might be a time for a discussion.

There's a difference between deceiving your partner, making them believe you love them not for the money primarily, and enjoying gifts when the situation is financially good.

Some people dump their partner at the first opportunity of someone richer appearing, or at the most minimal times of crisis, and that hurts their partner.

bamesjond0069 · Answer

I think a man likes to reward her for her submission. My girlfriend cooks cleans and does literally anything i ask. In another question i asked her to bark like a dog to prove a point and she did it no questions asked. So i do like to show her she's special by taking her out and buying her things and just being good to her.

CentralPerk77 · Answer

I would like to think because they have identified materialistic people need love too but there may be another reason

MotorcycleMan · Answer

Maybe it's just a relationship dynamic that they can understand.

TwistedTube · Answer

I don't like materialistic women, but I do like spoiling my woman and them getting excited over it.

Anonymous · Answer

Your theory is bogus. If you want men to respect, admire and value you, you have to be respectable, admirable and valuable. There are no shortcuts to that.

IAMNathanael · Answer

He's probably the type of man who has money and likes to spend it on his girl.

nikhole · Answer

Cause they get bored, or don't know what real loves comes from

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