A guy didn't initiate touch on second date, is he losing interest?

[Anonymous]

We had our first date, we chatted for hours, we held hands, hugged, and kissed goodbye. I told him I need more time to progress physical contact and he respected it. Then we had our second date two weeks later, this time we had nearly no physical contact. I was expecting him to hold my hand, but he kept his hands in his pockets most of the time. He only poked my waist once, and put his hand on my knee a few times when we were in the car.

Also, he initiates text everyday but the conversation is getting boring. We are just chatting random stuff in sentences, but with no flirting. Is he losing romantic interest? Am I getting friend-zoned?

[btbc92]

I don't think you understand how this goes as an adult. You told him you are not ready for physical contact. He gives you no contact now you're mad about it. Physical contact means actually touching. You didn't want him to touch you so he's not touching you. That includes your hands. You can't be wishy-washy with this. If that's too much too soon you already told him. He's respecting you. Now you think he's so-called friends throwing you? Even in friendships there boundaries. If those are your boundaries then he's respecting them. You are on a date. There is no guarantee you're going to be involved with that person long-term if you do not know if you're compatible or not as people. He is taking the time to get to know you. At least he is keeping his hands to himself. At least he didn't take offense to it. Other men will immediately start growing offended. If he lost interest he wouldn't have continued for a second date.

[rachel776]

i agree with this 100%, you told him not to do it, now you wonder why he's not

[SashaAMB]

Sounds like he actually listened and respected what you said. He maybe overdid it… which probably means he REALLY likes you. He might need more guidance on what you think is ok and what needs to wait. Call or see him in person and tell him what you’d like to do at this stage and maybe initiate. Make sure to tell him that you know he listened and that you love that about him.

[MTC29]

Second dates are always tougher than the first. The initial excitement has worn off, and all if the "interesting" topics were discussed in the first date. On date #2, people become real, and in many cases they prove to be boring and routine.

"I told him I need more time to progress physical contact and he respected it."

Yes, he respected it by backing off on date #2, which is what many guys would do when the subject is brought up at the close of date #1. If you were fine with hand holding, hugging and a goodnight kiss, you should have left it at that. His putting his hand on your knee is intimate. You allowed it, but in the back of his mind he's still thinking about your "warning" from the first date.

in my opinion, you're sending mixed signals on the issue of physical contact. There's nothing wrong with setting a line, but he needs to understand what it is.

[johnsmithjs]

I do not even know were to begin. Then you wonder way men are confused and giving up on young females. You told the guy that holding your hand, giving you a hug and giving you a goodbye kiss was to much for you to handle and now you are upset that on the second date he does not hold your hand. Wow, just wow!

Please do this guy and every other guy on the planet a favor, don't ever date.

[Brianbrake]

I think you did very good asking him for time to get further if he seem to be distant after that , then is his loss. He was not being serious at all with you. You can find someone better that respect your limits and times.

[Birdlegs]

You basically said “don’t touch me yet” and he’s not what’s the problem?

[Anonymous]

It sounds like he's respecting your wish of needing more time to progress to physical contact.

[hm7733]

Why don't you initiate it instead?

[Wise4myage]

Gee, maybe he just respects you.