Why do “hot” guys often become arrogant and players?

[Anonymous]

I know it’s a stereotype for the player-type jock-type of guy to be hot, but it seems that hot guys are more commonly players than hot women are. One of my oldest friends, he used to be really sweet and was a gentleman when he was younger, but he recently had a glow-up after he started working out and his personality has completely changed. Now he’s quite arrogant, competitive and self-obsessed and he breaks girls hearts. I refuse to believe this is his true personality. Why are most hot guys like this even if they weren’t like this before?

[Lionman95]

Because working out has boosted his ego and he now feels like he can do what he wants. Especially the stuff he feels entitled to but wasn´t able before. I don´t think its a guy´s true personality but it´s rather kind of an update to the one he had before now he feels like a plan in a phase where he´s playing around maybe looking for a partner to settle down with.
It can take some time until he has enough of that or looks for something else. It´s something many guys have to go through that comes from a higher testosterone level they get through working out. He probably needs some time to get used to that and then chances are higher than will be more normal again.

[Anonymous]

What most likely happened is that despite being a nice guy he got rejected a lot, maybe got fucked over a couple of times by women he dated, became somewhat bitter, and then he decided to lift weights and be a fuckboy because he got tired of all that.

I was kind of like him, I went through the same thing, although I wasn't lying to women and intentionally breaking their hearts. A lot of those types of guys go that way for that reason.

[Asker]

Thank you this is really helpful! It’s really sad that they have to get “big” to be appreciated by women though. I know my friend was called “too skinny” by a lot of girls he liked when he was younger and was rejected so you are correct. Do you think with you, you are still your old self but putting on a front? Or has your personality changed when you got bigger and more jacked?

[Opinion Owner]

I don't see it as a sad thing. For me, it made me go and get jacked and start eating good food, which I've done ever since. I see anything that pressures me to better myself as a positive.

For me I'd say that my personality didn't change but my attitudes towards women, dating, sex and relatonships did. I'd also say that it had more to do with the difference between the way women acted towards me, and especially options.

A guy with very few options, because few women find him attractive, is probably not going to be very confident at all. A guy with a lot of options is going to be confident or arrogant.

At first it was a front because I was still the shy guy, just trying to act confident/cocky, or act like a player. Then it worked, I got laid a bunch, then it just became real cockiness.

[Biancam13]

Maybe because they have a ton of girls throwing themselves at them thereby boosting their egos. So with that popularity comes arrogance and selfishness?

[Juxtapose]

If the opposite sex completely ignored you until you got jacked wouldn't you not take them very seriously? They are pretty much openly admitting they are only going for you because of muscles.

All of what is inside of your head, all of that unique character and personality did not matter for squat. That is enough to make a man pretty jaded in a lot of cases.

[Asker]

Yeah sounds Spot on! I think my friend is just weirded out that girls would reject him loads before, and now he gets tons of thirsty dms

[Asker]

It’s messed up and tbh he shouldn’t take those girls seriously

[Juxtapose]

Agreed, I hope he can do better in the future with women.

[Mofunfour20]

Because NOW they know that they are attractive to women. Women generally want the man that most women are attracted to. Blame women because if more women liked nerds, or overweight men then the fit guys wouldn't be as arrogant. Survival of the fittest

[Anonymous]

My problem was the girls I like, didn’t like me when I was younger. So I stopped caring about love. Plus, the fact that I meet a TON of women willing to cheat, changed my prospective. It’s also easy being picky. I change girl after girl if I find a single thing wrong about our relationship, then leave.

[Opinion Owner]

I’m not saying I’m “hot,” but a lot of girls have told me that….

[Anonymous]

Because the hottest of the hottest guys usually have a line of women in their DMs. They can afford to be arrogant and players because they know that if they lose one girl they have a bunch left.

I have no doubt women of that league work the same way.

[Asker]

I get that, but they don’t have to be like that. I’ve been a model since I was 17 and am considered cute, yet I don’t treat men like shit. I am still the same person I was when I was a dorky child. A lot of my model friends are also very down to Earth and are in committed relationships.

[Asker]

I guess these players don’t realise that to women with high self esteem and are older, this arrogance and player like personality is a real turn off

[Opinion Owner]

I guess so. They say power is far more addictive than cocaine or something like that. When you know you got a lot more options you are more than willing to be very picky about them.

[HighValue]

Maybe he saw the difference of how people treated him that didn't pay any attention to him before so he figures why respect them.

[Asker]

You have a point!!

[befuddle]

What you thought men where built in factories like automatons and they don’t have a range of emotions and moods? Guys are capable of being different things to different people at different times. It’s all in there, we just don’t show everything to everyone...

[abc3643]

Because they can.

It's the same with beautiful girls too.

[Asker]

I think it’s less common with beautiful women though. As in beautiful women want relationships more than beautiful men do

[abc3643]

No they don't. Lots of them fuck like bunnies and have body counts in the dozens.

[Asker]

That’s only the IG model type though. Most models or regular hot girls and stuff are in relationships, or at least more open to relationships than not guys are.

[abc3643]

Nope. That's regular girl-next-door beauties too. Girls love to fuck every bit as much as we do.

[Asker]

Disagreed but that’s fine

[abc3643]

Well, I am older than you and have experienced these things in person.

[Asker]

😂😂 just take the L dude. We both have experience, I’m an actual woman (and considered attractive) and you’re older. It really doesn’t matter does it.

[abc3643]

I have no L.
Unfortunately, I literally lived this in 1988.

[abc3643]

Don't bother replying.
I am muting the question.

[IMuser]

Because arrogance shows abundance. When you are treated badly for being nice and rewarded for being arrogant, why wouldn't you be arrogant? (At least initially)

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

Having an abundance of good physical looks, knowledge, skill, money etc feeds the ego and most humans cannot control their success and become arrogant.

[jasco]

Why not when sex and women comes easy. If you look good, you become an ass usually. Not all ways buts its getting more uncommon to not be

[Kyle-Jackson78]

my toxic trait is liking arrogant guys 🤌 they so fine. Most likely because due to more girls hittin on em they become more confident and go for hotter girls

[n4meAL]

usually they are either men or women who are like this, will start to panic and stress when people start to lose interest in them

[Shamalien]

Girls love a hot douche who treats em like dirt and fills them with hormones

[Emiku]

Because their assholes

[JustiReno]

Doesn’t everyone go through a go phase?

[jahaims]

Because they can fuck a lot and others can't

[clemdenim]

parents and girls make it too easy on them

[noohair]

Could be steroids.