He brought up his ex?

[Anonymous]

I'm a 22F and he's a 21M. We first started talking 3 weeks ago. the first time we hungout he drove an hour away to pick me and my friends up from the bar to drive us home. i tried kissing him goodbye and he said no cause i was drunk. i've seen him twice since and we have only kissed. he bought me flowers for the third date, has been picking me up, opening doors and being putting in noticeable effort. i know he told his parents and friends about me. My only concern is that during our second date he asked me about my previous ex. i didn't say much, but when i asked about his ex he talked for 5-10 min about how they were on and off for years and she cheated on him. he said he hated her for it. i know this is a red flag, and makes me nervous he's not over her. they have been apart for almost a year. what do you guys think?

[Guy13]

Wow... refreshing to me. No, I am not right-no "sex" while drinking. I'm so sorry about that... do you like flowers? And even after screwing up..."Het Mom-I met someone AND that is not easy for Boy to do... Mom knows this "girl" has to be "watched". I don't know what the women would say but I know a few that would jump on a guy like this... with a heart and a conscious. Seems sweet to me...

[LazerBean]

Which part is the red flag? He is conveying important information related to his relationship history, as he should be. I would say hating someone for cheating on you is pretty dang normal.

[Asker]

I guess i'm just nervous cause he said they were on and off and it's a red flag when people talk bad about their ex's. it seemed like a lot of information for a second date. but maybe that's just me? I don't know!!

[LazerBean]

I do tend to think that being on and off in relationships is a red flag but personally I don't see it as any more of a red flag than someone who's been in a lot of relationships in general. Also personally I always like to find out as much important information as someone as possible so that I can figure out faster if I want anything to do with them or not. But I think being bitter towards someone who cheated on you is perfectly acceptable.

[Anonymous]

Its not a red flag, so stop assuming it is. He was just being honest about his ex.