So I was at the car dealership today getting my car fixed and working on some school work while I was passing time. I deal with a ton of insecurity issues that I hide because of previous trauma from high school or not feeling like I was pretty enough.
Towards the end and after high school and recently I’ve gotten tons of compliments on my looks. I work as a cashier PT so I’ll have women or little girls tell me all the time how pretty / beautiful I am. I have been told I should model a few times too. I’m aware that I’m attractive but sometimes it’s hard to believe it because I still have those hidden insecurities of when I used to get called ugly in 9th grade and wasn’t included on any of the guys “lists” throughout high school.
I don’t think I was ever ugly but I think I got better looking.
Today an older man walked into the dealership and I was sitting down and looking down. He kinda walked past me I don't know if he saw me and went to the front desk and started laughing and chatting with this lady there. I guess he knew her and had been in there many times. And he said she got prettier everytime he saw her. Then he said she might be the prettiest thing he’s ever seen. I think that’s what he said lol but not sure. But I felt like that’s pretty crappy because there was a room full of women. I’ve had men call me pretty before or compliment me but rarely.
Why does this make me feel like crap or feel ugly?
Towards the end and after high school and recently I’ve gotten tons of compliments on my looks. I work as a cashier PT so I’ll have women or little girls tell me all the time how pretty / beautiful I am. I have been told I should model a few times too. I’m aware that I’m attractive but sometimes it’s hard to believe it because I still have those hidden insecurities of when I used to get called ugly in 9th grade and wasn’t included on any of the guys “lists” throughout high school.
I don’t think I was ever ugly but I think I got better looking.
Today an older man walked into the dealership and I was sitting down and looking down. He kinda walked past me I don't know if he saw me and went to the front desk and started laughing and chatting with this lady there. I guess he knew her and had been in there many times. And he said she got prettier everytime he saw her. Then he said she might be the prettiest thing he’s ever seen. I think that’s what he said lol but not sure. But I felt like that’s pretty crappy because there was a room full of women. I’ve had men call me pretty before or compliment me but rarely.
Why does this make me feel like crap or feel ugly?
