If a man keeps pursuing me online, talking about sex and romantic relationships, what does he want?

[Anonymous]

He’s chased me in person and through Facebook for a year and he has Asperger’s. Since I’ve avoided him, he’s made new internet dating profiles to try to find me and talk about a desire for romantic and sexual relationships but not being sure if he’s ready. He hints it’s him and then when asked directly, denies it. Then he makes more to tell me he knows personal stuff about me.

[Zayed_]

“Then he makes more to tell me he knows personal stuff about me”

That’s really a red flag 🚩

Never use personal stuff other people told you about themselves, That’s really unaccepted.

[Asker]

What do you think he wants from me?

[Pacquet]

I don’t feel like this is complicated. Sounds like he just wants to bang. Is there something stopping you from asking him what he’s looking for?

[Asker]

The fact that he’s been stalking me for a year; online and in person. I’m worried about encouraging him.

[Pacquet]

I see. It sounds like you’re interested though, am I wrong?

If you’re interested in dating or just hooking up with him I would suggest to be very clear in your communication about what you want. If you’re NOT interested in him then I would also communicate that very clearly or else this “stalking” behavior will probably continue. There’s no better hint one can give than being clear and direct, it saves everyone time.

I’m afraid that your passiveness might be more encouraging than anything. Don’t people please by trying to spare his feelings if you’re not interested (don’t be mean though just direct), adults can handle disappointment. I hope this helps, good luck my friend.

[prensesmishka]

It doesn’t sound like you’re safe when he’s around you. Be careful. These kind of men are more motivated even when you pay attention. They live in their own imagination. Don’t let him know anything personal about you. There was a freak who tried to sneak into my life. I flirted with him for a while until I understand that he wasn’t normal. He reached out to my mother and sister and asked them to convince me to be with him.

[melanieeeB]

I would block him and run as fast as I can! He seems not romantically interested but obsessed and that in a very negative creepy way! Get away from him.

[Anonymous]

He's obviously very desperate to fuck your brains out.

[Asker]

So he wants a sexual relationship? Why? When he never seemed keen 2 years ago when I asked him out 3 times.

[Asker]

I don’t know if it’s that I’m missing something because I have Asperger’s too.

[Opinion Owner]

That was two years ago, people can and do change their mind.

[Asker]

Why would they change their minds? I always know exactly who I want. I never change my mind.

[Opinion Owner]

Well good for you, he obviously has, so just lay down, spread your legs and let him make the world rock for you.

[Asker]

I was in love with him two years ago.

[Asker]

That complicates things.

[Opinion Owner]

Well it's entirely up to you what you want or do now
Good Luck.

[Asker]

Thanks 😊👍

[Lynnfriend]

Sounds like a stocker and is obsessed with you, that can be dangerous

[Crankor]

It's obvious he wants you... doubt in a romantic way. Sounds like a creeper stalker.

[nawtee_me]

to take advantage of you and leave you afterwards...

[DubiousIntentions]

Seriously? You actually don't know what he wants, or is this just for the conversation and responses?

[Asker]

I actually don’t know what he wants. The trauma counsellor said either revenge or to be in a relationship with me. Which is it?

[serious_miss419]

If you’re replying to him then you’re allowing it to happen.

[Asker]

It’s hard to know if it’s him until he finds ways to tell me that it is. No one deserves to be stalked.

[serious_miss419]

I agree with you. Nobody deserves that.
But ignoring him with allow you to not feed into his behavior. He’s enjoying it and it’s disgusting. It’s like when we respond to a bully, they’ll continue to do so. Find a way to better yourself, so that you don’t end up in a dangerous situation.
Find your best friend or call a hotline or keep venting with someone you trust that you know has genuine supportive responses. He’s evil and dangerous. Please 🙏 remove yourself from him.

[Anonymous]

sounds like you hurt him previously

[In_Trance]

this is a fairly tale. Move on

[Anonymous]

he want sex